SRS You're going to think I'm weird

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Headstrong, Dec 20, 2007.

  1. Headstrong

    Headstrong New Member

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    Ever have deja vu? I have it ALOT. Every time I do, I'm so absolutely sure that I've been there before and I know where I got it from. In my dreams. Now, I'm not saying I'm psychic because I don't believe in them.

    Anyhow, I recently split up with an ex and her child of 2 years. I raised the child from child birth. Since then, she had told the biological father about her and I'm no longer part of her life. This has been since July and I'm ridiculously depressed about it. I'll sit here and wonder if I ever will have kids and a family again because I'm 29. It's getting a little late in the game.

    Also, I've sat there and thought to myself "I've never seen a child of mine in my dreams." Finally, I did last night. It was a little girl and it was almost unmistakable that she was my little girl. Looked just like me. Kind of gave me a sense of hope.

    Commence the "crazy" comments. :)
     
    Last edited: Dec 20, 2007
  2. ChaCha

    ChaCha Active Member

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    lol 29 isn't late in the game
     
  3. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    Hmm...so you dreamed about a girl you've been thinking a lot about and adding to the experience of thought by saying things like, "I'm 29 and it's getting late in the game" which is just a longer winded version of "I hear my biological clock ticking" or is that a shorter versions?? Either way....the dream is simply a reflection of your recent thought processes.

    But regardless....be careful what you wish for, you just might get it. :)
     
  4. polishillusion

    polishillusion New Member

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    do not get desperate or nothing.
     
  5. Arclight

    Arclight Hypercube

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    I've had this shit too.

    I wasn't sure whether or not it came from dreams, or whether it was me imagining it. Eventually I had a dream that felt like it was one of "those" and I made note of it.

    Scary part was, that it came true about 5 years later despite me trying to prevent it. :hs: It really made me think about whether or not we have free will, or whether we are slaves to our destiny.

    Basically the dream involved a crazy blue bathroom, where everything in it was blue. I mean the tiles were blue, the fixtures were blue, the counter was blue. It was memorable, and it felt like a dream that was gonna come true, so I made a point of trying to avoid a ridiculously blue bathroom like that.

    Eventually I was at my aunt's wedding, and I headed up to my hotel room for the night, wasted. Before going to bed, I took a piss and walked into the bathroom without paying attention to it. I turned on the light and started pissing, and fucking BAM, I was there, exactly as I had seen it in my dream. :hs:
     
  6. Guerilla Grower

    Guerilla Grower New Member

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    Since as long as I can remember I've had strange things happen to me through out my life, and frequent occurrences of deja vu. It happens to me atleast every month, either I experience the exact same situation I have had in the past, or experience something I had dreamed about while sleeping. I'm talking the same exact one, I get almost kind of a chill/realization feeling that I am having a moment of deja vu.
     
  7. Ivan

    Ivan New Member

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    It's never late in the game.

    My father had a daughter three years ago with another woman and he was 42 at the time. They still live together and seem happy.
     
  8. Titan King

    Titan King New Member

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    Theres a 90 year old man who's just had a child and he says he wants to continue fathering until he's 100.

    Hope that cheers up your "Im 29, its too late" problem
     
  9. gkremian

    gkremian New Member

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    I'm just going to add that my father was 41 when I was born, so 29 isn't too late!
     
  10. hayes321

    hayes321 A legend of blue balls

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    I'm 16 and have deja vu all the time. Like random instances in my life reappear all the time. Like today, my gf asked me the difference between a phyciatrist and a phycologist was, out of the blue. Today I log on and see a thread about it, out of the blue. Stuff like that happens atleast twice a day.
     
  11. daaarn

    daaarn New Member

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    i get deja vu sometimes too. mainly it's just pretty mundane stuff though that i feel like i've dreamt about b4.
     
  12. Asherman

    Asherman New Member

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    Your post, it seems to me, has two separate topics.

    1. The Deja Vu Experience. There are a number of perfectly rational explanations for this phenomena that don't involve the supernatural. Strictly speaking the stuff of dreams isn't deja vu, though the prophetic interpretation of dreams is quite popular. Your posting seems to sping from a dream experience, so lets just stay with that.

    During REM sleep we experience intense dreams that are deeply personal and pregnant with meaning. The subconscious seems to be in control, and dreams are filled with symbolic abstractions of our daily lives, experiences, anxieties, and hopes. As we sleep, our minds continue to grind away at difficult problems seeking alternative solutions. Dream interpretation is one of mankind's most ancient preoccupations, and we're not that different from our ancestors who were hunter-gatherers. Modern psychologists have a field day with dreams, and there is an extensive body of research available if your interested.

    In the instant case, you've recently experienced a major change in your life; a girl child that you've emotionally become attached to is gone, and what you hoped to be a permanent relationship was a disappointment. You're approaching your 30th birthday, and in our cultural context that is the demarcation point to "middle-age", the beginning of the end. Your mind is chewing on these anxieties and doubts. The dream of having your own daughter is most likely your sub-conscious reassuring you that your future isn't as bleak as it might seem to the conscious mind.

    2. Anxiety over progeny. As has been pointed out, many people have their first child during the middle-age, and men in their seventies have been known to impregnate. We are imprinted genetically to reproduce. That's what all the hormone-driven sexual pursuit games that drive young people to distraction is all about. Men want to have sex with as many desirable females as possible, and women are looking for an Alpha-male to provide a secure nest for her and her babies. Culture and fashion sometimes try to deny those impulses, but ultimately thats what both culture and fashion are designed to achieve. Within our genetic heritage there is variation can be very great from almost zero "need" for reproduction to 100% driven by sexual and psychological drives that dominate a person's life. Most of us are somewhere in between.

    Childhood and adolescence are, as everyone knows filled with progressing from one phase to another. What is less generally recognized is that we continue to evolve through different phases right up to our deaths of old age. As you enter "middle-age" your physical and psychological needs are entering a new phase, and we tend to experience the same sort of anxieties we went through at the beginning of adolescence. That is, uncertainty, a vague sense of not being up to the challenge, resistance to the changes, etc. Most people are ready to "settle down" and adopt more "regular" life patterns than they followed during their 20's. Couples are forming and "breaking up that old gang of mine". That can further unsettle us and cause us question whether we will ever get it together. Most do "get it together", so relax.

    My guess is that you will find a mutual attraction with a woman within your own age cohort in the next few years. Keep your eyes and options open and the "signals" should be relatively clear. At this stage in your life it is more important to find a partner who is ready to settle down into the task of building a secure life than one who is a "party animal" sending out loud sexual signals. Statistically someone from your own cultural- socio-economic class with similar educational background will more likely be a good fit for the long-haul. And, that's what you're looking for now... the long-haul where you build a secure life fit for the children your growing love will bear.
     
  13. Headstrong

    Headstrong New Member

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    Some of you guys take note. I feel as if I just went to an e-therapist. THAT'S how you reply to someone with a problem. Wow, thanks.:bowdown:
     
  14. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    I basically think you are just trying to see the things that you would like to see in your life. Even if you thought you've experienced a scene a thousand times, in the end result it matters nothing. If anything stop living in the past, and start defining your life in the future, remember its you who makes you happy,
     
  15. Steve_O

    Steve_O New Member

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    That happens to me a few times a month, where I will dream of something and it will happen a week later.
     
  16. BigBadJohn

    BigBadJohn Pay-back time OT Supporter

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    I know how you feel about the dejavu thing
    Every now and then I would dream about stuff that seems like it would happen in real life a month later or so, but then I just concluded that I usually dreamed about real life stuff and that some of my dreams just happened to be similar to real life instances
     
  17. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

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    Having deja vu often can be a sign of partial seizures. Actually it is one of the biggest signs for partial seizures, epsecially those comming from the temporal lobes. I know this, because i've been through a couple of studies and clinics after recently being diagnosed as an epileptic after my first (and only) tonic-clonic seizure.

    Almost all of my partial seizures are preceeded by intense (INTENSE) de ja vu, and then a few minutes of just blankly staring at things with a bit of anxiety, and then after a few minutes I barely remember what happened. No one watching would even think I just had a seizure (because most peope think seizures mean twitching on the ground only).

    Also, many other "psychic" phenomenom has been shown to be a result of seizure activity in the temporal lobes of the brain. Its interesting, but sometimes it really really sucks. I deal with these things a few times a day now, and so far meds arent helpful. It doesnt bother me, for years I enjoyed the experiences, but now I just fear going into another tonic-clonic.

    After I was diagnosed epileptic, I had a friend who also reported alot of deja vu experiences. After what happened to me, he went and had an EEG that showed hyperactivity in his temporal lobes too and he is currently working with his neurologist on determining if he is epileptic or not.
     
  18. RedVsBlue

    RedVsBlue Penguins > *

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    Do you write down your dreams in detail, and then go back to them in a week and see what has happened? Or is more like something happens and you are lik "hey, i remember dreaming about that last week"? The latter is very common. It's not dejavu but just some crossed wires recalling and storing information. I know its impossible to convince someone of this if they believe they are really expriencing dejavu and dreaming the future, but that is not really what is going on in this case.
     
  19. Bleed

    Bleed New Member

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    dude you're fine. my boss had kids when he was 40. not a big deal
     

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