your friends & her friends in a relationship

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by NCS, Mar 9, 2010.

  1. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    So when you're in a serious relationship, is it pretty much considered standard that your friends will be around/you'll be going out with them and vice versa, and that most of the time the other half of the couple is welcome?

    Is it considered normal that a girlfriend does her best to get along with the man's peer group?

    Basically i am broken up again and one of the main reasons is "i want to see other people too often, even if i am with her". this translates into i like being very social esp. on the weekends, and she doesnt consider this a good time, doesn't enjoy it. eventually she ended up not wanting to join in on it.
     
  2. THoC

    THoC New Member

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    to me its a MUST.

    i am a very social person. i like to go out often.

    do i expect that my gf come with me EVERY TIME? no. but if she always wants to stay home eventually it will annoy one, if not both, of us.

    i go out of my way to socialize with a gf's group. i will compromise when it comes to hanging out with which group of friends.
     
  3. blackbirdbeatle

    blackbirdbeatle New Member

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    She wants to be with you on the weekends at least as much as you are with friends. You want to go out. You can't force extroversion on many people. Even if she went out with you on half the weekends, that would be a huge commitment on her behalf as an introvert. Did you try not going out some weekends for her?

    Or maybe she tried but just doesn't get along with your friends for whatever reason. Or maybe you just get drunk every weekend and she's over that.
     
  4. reminisce

    reminisce OT Supporter

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    it really depends on your personality types. some people like going out alot and some people are homebodies. if you two are opposite then it will be difficult to work it out because it boils down to you simply enjoying different things.
     
  5. ww_Crimson

    ww_Crimson New Member

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    I don't expect her to always go out with me but I like her to know my friends and be comfortable around them. Vice versa as well.
     
  6. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    yeah she has a diff idea of 'how we should be spending the weekends' but it boils down to just me and her going off and doing stuff

    i love quality time but the weekend is when you can easily do the 'more the merrier' approach, see lots of friends together instead of on a one-by-one basis, so it just makes sense.

    yes i do party. i'm just trying to do a bit of a reality check because my last two relationships had this huge conflict of interest. the girl basically wanted to spend 24/7 together and go off and do things im not into on the weekends, and i am much more social and like to keep a social circle
     
    Last edited: Mar 9, 2010
  7. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    You need someone who is either more independent than that girl was, or less into you. Or both.
     
  8. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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  9. Ago816

    Ago816 New Member

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    My last girlfriend was kind of like this. I would always go and be social with her friends. I even became pretty close to some of them and still hang out with them.
    On the other hand if it came to my friends she would flip out. It was very annoying.
    You just need to find a girl that can enjoy being with you and with your friends as well. Likes to go out, likes to enjoy herself in groups.
     
  10. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    you're right, although i keep beating myself up over it thinking that i should have given up that part of my life and just done everythign to make her happy.

    i know this sounds stupid, because in doing that i would have no longer had a balanced life from my point of view.
     

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