You know you're a bodybuilder when...

Discussion in 'Fitness & Nutrition' started by Frank Dux, Jan 5, 2010.

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  1. Frank Dux

    Frank Dux Guest

    -You see the people at your gym more than your family.
    -When you start looking at everybody's body to see if they workout
    -When you wake up, you check to see if you are sore.
    -The UPS guys knows you by first name from all your BB.com orders
    -You're able to choke down can after can of tuna…with ease.
    -You get asked to flex on average 5 times daily
    -When you pee with a stop watch
    -You wear an large shirt and it's tight at the top, but loose at the bottom
    -You're able so spell Arnold Schwarzenegger correctly
    -Regular gym members come to YOU for supplement advice
    -Your friend asks you what you did today? and you reply back/biceps.
    -No matter how big you get, you will never be "big enough."
    -You have your alarm set for meal times
    -You have a panic attack when you see only one can bison burger left in the freezer
    -When you choke down the most disgusting foods for protein content
    -You think of food in terms of functionality, practicality, and finally taste, rather than the other way around.
    -You think of cardio, not scissors, when you hear the word "cutting."
    -You've learned more about the human body from lifting than in Biology class.
    -You read muscle and fitness magazine for entertainment, not information.
    -You take more pills than your grandma who has arthritis and high blood pressure.
    -You'd rather miss an important meeting or date than a workout.
    -You have a whole cabinet or shelf just for your supplemenmts.
    -You look at the protein content of foods before anything else.
    -You begin to appreciate the taste of water.
    -Your parents can't understand why you won't sit down and have a family dinner and you insist on making your own food.
    -You leave a party or social event because you have to go eat meal 7.
    -When ur pecks are bigger then most girls
    -You won't workout with ur friends because u worked that muscle group the day before.
    -You prefer getting protein powder as a present over clothes
    -When chicks say, "you shouldnt get any bigger..."
    -When people can see your back from the front
    -Your friends make fun of you when you have a head of brocolli as part of your lunch
    -You know that a 2.5 oz serving of Tuna has 32.5 g of protein and 1.5 g of fat.
    -When you can't finish eating your food and so you shove the remainder in a blender so you can just drink it down.
    -When you're asked what day it is and you reply with a bodypart
    -When you can no longer reach behind to scratch your back
    -When u walk by a car and look at ur reflection in the window
    -When u eat 40 egg whites a week
    -You wanna kill everyone who thinks they are cut, built, and have abs while weighing 115 lbs
    -When you are afraid to walk to the store when you are bulking because you will burn calories
    -When you feel like crap the day after a workout just because you missed one minute of sleep
    -When you start guessing how much each person at the gym weighs
    -When you curse after every last set of the exercise
    -When you know the name of every major muscle in the body.
    -People ask you at school and work "what the hell do you carry in that bag??" and it's full of snacks, protein shakes, etc.
    -You feel good when your shirt's starting to get tighter on you
    -After a workout you go take a shower and you can't even lift that soap past your neck cuz it's so damn heavy but it feels so good.
    -You can make exercises with any objects
    -Almost everyone who enters your room thinks yer gay because of all this muscular guys posters on your walls
    -When you miss a meal, you can literally "feel" your muscles shrinking.
    -You avoid intense labor the day before a workout, so you can perform at your peak the next day.
    -You're late for work because you forgot your protien shake, and you had to drive back home to get it.
    -The first assumption you make about anyone is how much they can benchpress.
    -When you feel sick and you wanna puke ... but you keep trying not to because of all the protein in your stomach
    -You get stopped by airport security when they see you with a bag of white powder. Little do they know that its creatine
    -You have uncontrollable gas that smells rancid and you can't do anything about it, period.
    -You want to violently attack the next person who thinks that creatine is a steroid.
    -Skinny kids are always challenging you to pushup/situp/pullup competitions
    -You feel VERY bad after eating something you love E.g Fried chicken.
    -You had a bad workout and literally cried
    -You are asked COUNTLESS number of times whether you are in football/wrestling/boxing etc. even though you have NEVER played any of those sports.
    -When you walk past Vitamin world at the mall, and laugh/smile.
    -When people think every pill you're taking is some sort of steriod, which is obviously cheating.
    -When you keep lifting even though that pain (not a good pain) is killing you. You finish your workout.
    -When u hide food to make sure that no one else is gonna eat ur supply
    -You drink so much water, whenever you piss there's 2 streams.
    -The day after your leg workout, people ask why you're walking like robocop
    -When your neck is the same size as your head
    -When you walk in a room and start to analyze if people workout and if you can take on everyone in the room.
    -When your friends make fun of you eating every 2 hours and you pretend not to hear them but deep inside you are proud of yourself.
    -You could train people without having to be a certified trainer
    -When you get pulled over driving home after leg day; the cop thinks your drunk but the truth is your legs are so fried you can hardly move them
    -When you can look at someone's body and instantaneously figure out their flaws
    -When you don't go to the gym for a couple of days, everyone starts getting really worried about you
    -You weigh yourself everyday and expect to gain a pound every two days when bulking.
    -You'd miss a day in the gym before you'd miss a meal.
    -People ask you "Are you not working-out today?" instead of "Are you working-out today?"
     
  2. deadbolt

    deadbolt New Member

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    -you take it up the ass
     
  3. loading

    loading OT Supporter

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    Lol

    I don't get taking a piss with a stop watch. What is the point of that
     
  4. jokka

    jokka OT Supporter

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    when you visualize the nutrients going into your muscles during a pwo meal
     
  5. RICK RO$$

    RICK RO$$ Active Member

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    I don't bop I do the money dance
    -you let gay dudes worship your muscles and JO to you for steroids
     
  6. jokka

    jokka OT Supporter

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    you enjoy smelling your fart after eating a can of kidney beans.
     
  7. RICK RO$$

    RICK RO$$ Active Member

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    I don't bop I do the money dance
    -suck dick for dollars
     
  8. Adom

    Adom OT Supporter

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    -When you start looking at everybody's body to see if they workout


    i was at a strip club with a buddy a couple weeks ago.. first thing we noticed on her... sexy calves :big grin:
     
  9. retorq

    retorq What up bitch??

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    You know how I know you're not gay??
     
    Last edited: Jan 5, 2010
  10. synthetic

    synthetic New Member

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    its funny, ive been reading a book called biology of emotions.... stated that men who are given testosterone have a higher likelihood of becoming homosexual... they also did studies on animal/humans who are gay and thought by giving them more test would make them less gay, which failed. The book states sexual orientation is more determined by environment than hormones... you have a higher chance of being gay if your mother was stressed during pregnancy
     
  11. Adom

    Adom OT Supporter

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    cause i was at a strip club.

    and i got me a dance. and i said rude sexual comments to the wiminz cause they take off money for clothes and i knew i'd get away with it?


    she had some fucking sexy calves. oh, and when she started shaking her ass, all eyes were there. :big grin: fucking hot.
     
  12. Adom

    Adom OT Supporter

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    i sell my test to homos.
     
  13. NUDES

    NUDES New Member

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    None of this means you aren't gay homeboy.
     
  14. NUDES

    NUDES New Member

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    -You actually step on stage. Until then you're a wanna-be.

    -You suck dick for drugs.

    -You take dick for drugs.

    -You fuck fruit for drugs.

    -You dance for drugs.

    -You eat asshole for drugs.

    -You get your asshole eaten for drugs.

    -You lie down on your stomach and get a prostate massage for drugs.
     
  15. Centipedes? In My Vagina

    Centipedes? In My Vagina It's more common than you think

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    -when you measure, weigh, and record your stools
     
  16. Adom

    Adom OT Supporter

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    one time i had sex with a girl.

    i have never had sex with a male.

    that mean i'm not gay?

    i've never had sexual thoughts or fantasies of men.

    that mean i'm not gay?

    jesus, what's it going to take?! do i have to just fucking suck your penis to prove im not gay or wtf?!
     
  17. Spartan

    Spartan OT Supporter

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    this is so gay
     
  18. deznutz

    deznutz New Member

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    bodybuilding 4 life
     
  19. jdm-cd5

    jdm-cd5 Guest

    pretty funny and true :rofl::rofl:
     
  20. Bodhi

    Bodhi My crotch is red .. my lambos blue .. and ill be g

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    gay for pay
     
  21. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    niggah you lame
     
  22. ices

    ices New Member

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    :rofl:
     
  23. Bodhi

    Bodhi My crotch is red .. my lambos blue .. and ill be g

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    you wanna get together and be body builders in a dark unlit basement somewhere?
     
  24. JeremyD

    JeremyD New Member

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    Theres nothing gay about rubbing protan on another mans balls.






    Just saying.
     
  25. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    sure. you bring the "poseing oil"
     
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