SRS Would you consider this to be a serious addiction? I think my friend needs help

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by JakobwithaK, May 30, 2007.

  1. JakobwithaK

    JakobwithaK Titty fuck for the win!

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    I have this girlfriend who I know (not close friends, but good enough as we have worked together). She is 19, and as oddly as this sounds, she is addicted to her xbox. She used to live in the same city, up until 2 months ago and now shes in Philly...shes alone. She has yet to tell me why she moved, for work, or what? Not that its any of my business but Im just curious. All I know is she isnt working, and shes renting this small apartment with just herself there.

    All this girl does is play Gears of War 24/7. She only plays that one game and plays it for at least 15hrs a day (sometimes even coming close to 18-19). She usually does this with just one break in between. Now I dont mean to get nosey or anything because Im sure its none of my business. But when you move to another city, let alone another country, find a new place...and all you do is play the same video game all day and all night? :hsugh:

    She has been doing this ever since the game came out, which was 6 months ago...so thats 6 months of her life wasted doing nothing but sitting in front of a TV playing a video game for 15-20hrs a day, 7 days a week. She even told me just couple weeks ago that she isnt sleeping well, wonder why :hsugh:...and frankly to be honest with you, I highly doubt she ever leaves her apartment. She wakes up, showers Im sure, gets on her xbox plays till supper....eats....and gets back on till the morning hours.

    She is on my friends list on XBOX live so thats how I see when shes on, and she is always on playing that game. Whether its noon on a weekday, 7pm at night, 2am in the morning or 5 am on a Sunday she is always on. I think she needs help because right now, she is not working, not doing anything with her life right now - she has no life but playing that game.

    What can I say to her without being rude or hurtful? Maybe its none of my business? But trust me, playing for that much a day without getting out of the house and socializing is depressing trsut me....
     
  2. jonno

    jonno New Member

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    wow.. that's pretty fucked up. how is she even affording rent/bills?

    unfortunately, it seems like she will only change if SHE wants to. you're not just going to make her stop playing video games all day. maybe when cash runs short and she has to get a job she will be forced to not play as much.
     
  3. Blahaboxxx

    Blahaboxxx OT Supporter

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    I have, in the past, played world of warcraft like she plays gears. I would have reacted very negatively if I was called out about it by a friend; though I was, and am, aware of just how much of a waste of time it is in the grand scheme of things. She probably feels engaged by the game and it's an easy way to pass time.

    Perhaps she is overwhelmed by the size of Philly and just needs encouragement to find other activities. Unfortunately, that encouragement probably needs to be someone actively helping get her out of the house, and not someone suggesting she go outside via the phone/internet. Tricky when she's alone there.
     
  4. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    Is there a possibility that the xbox shows her as playing when it's paused? Maybe she's out and about but doesn't want to lose her place in the game.. I do that for Red Steel when I can't get to a save point but want to leave for a while.
     
  5. JakobwithaK

    JakobwithaK Titty fuck for the win!

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    thats what I was thinkin too, but she plays multiplayer :o
     
  6. RedDawg

    RedDawg Well-Known Member

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    she has to be working to afford rent here, its not too cheap

    is it possible she's doing something she doesnt want everyone to know about (stripping for example)?
     
  7. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Is she playing other people's characters to build up their levels and getting paid for that?
     
  8. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Addiction is defined by having serious consequences as a result of behaviours.

    Serious consequences such as interfering with your school or putting your job or career at risk.

    She may be very happy doing what she's doing, and while I agree, this isn't a great way to spend your life, if SHE is happy, and it's not creating any serious long-term consequences for her, then it really isn't a problem.



    Instead of sorta snooping in her business or telling her what to do, why don't you express your concern this way:

    Since you think she might not have any other social outlet other than Gears, why don't YOU invite her out to do something?

    Give her a reason to go out. Make it easy for her to go out.
    Don't simply throw some words at her, basically telling her how to live her life.



    Think she get out more? I agree.

    So help her do it, instead of spending cycles thinking of the optimal way to tell her.
    Just help her actually DO it instead.

    Give that a shot. And good luck.
    She's lucky to have you as a friend, even though she may not realize it at this moment.
     
  9. CKGuY914

    CKGuY914 simplicity vs complexity

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    I have, in the past, been addicted to MMORPGs such as Everquest, Final Fantasy XI, and World of Warcraft.

    I was much the same way, would play up to 16-18 hours a day, stopping only to sleep and getting food (then I'd eat while I play).

    Even after I became aware of the unhealthy addiction I still couldn't stop myself from the routine because it allowed me to immerse in that virtual world and get away from the problems of the real world.

    My friends at the time were played these games casually so none of them advised me about stopping. Whenever my girlfriend bring it up I would become really defensive and tell her that I will do whatever it is that I want to do.

    The whole last year, because of World of Warcraft, I rarely showed up to any of my classes and I ended up failing and dropping classes here and there. Now I am 3 credits short of my Bachelors of Science in Electrical Engineering and I am not in school right now. For about 6 months I was not in school nor was I working and I racked up about $8,000 worth of credit card debt due to living expenses.

    Just about 3 months ago I finally was able to quit playing World of Warcraft because the reality finally settled in of how fucked up my life would become if I continued this routine.

    Now I currently work full time as a Test Technician at a circuit card contract company and I am readmitted at ASU to finish up my last 3 credits for my Bachelor's degree this coming fall.

    You're a great friend to worry about her this much, I wish I had friends that would have helped me through those times.

    I hope that you keep it up and don't give up on her.
     
    Last edited: May 31, 2007

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