Why is it that ....

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Riconosuave, Jan 10, 2006.

  1. Riconosuave

    Riconosuave New Member

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    ... a lot of women, after you set up a date with them, will ask you to call them again some time between now and the time of the date to double check that it's still good to go?! WTF? These women just have too much going on and tend to forget easily? Easier for them to come up with an excuse to back out later? What?
     
  2. rasactive

    rasactive New Member

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    They want to talk to you :dunno:
     
  3. Verene

    Verene New Member

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    Well I can answer for all girls, I just know that I like to comfirm things for my own sanity to ensure thatI have time/place all worked out in my head and I know for sure what is goin on. I just have a tendancy to feel like I'm forgetting something or doing somethign wrong, so having double checked keeps me from going into spazz mode and allows me to relax and just concentrate on having fun on the date. And trust me a girl that is relaxed and happy usually means more fun on the date for everyone involved.
     
  4. hawk_196

    hawk_196 Light Yourself on Water

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    just be firm when setting the date and tell them to call you instead
     
  5. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    they are insecure or want to talk to you.

    i like the response of being firm with them on the date

    i have just recently realized what it means when you are supposed to be the "man" in the relationship and its changed my whole outlook on dating.
     
  6. Riconosuave

    Riconosuave New Member

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    All valid reasons. I don't really like the idea of having to call to remind someone. If you like me, then you should remember this sh1t! Write it down or something. He11, I'm excited about the date, and there's no way I'm forgetting about it! Plus, I'm always paranoid that she'll cancel. Nothing I can do about it this go around. I told her I would call her, and I keep my word.
     
  7. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

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    why are you assuming that she's gonna cancel? if i set a date with a guy i really like, i'll call him to ask if we're still on. i guess, well, in my case :hs:, it's more shock and awe... like, "did he really say yes? :eek3:

    :dunno:
     
  8. Riconosuave

    Riconosuave New Member

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    Don't know ... I'm my own worst enemy sometimes. Often times I just overthink things way too much, which is usually not a good thing for me.
     
  9. chica&buddies

    chica&buddies Active Member

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    oh... believe me, i can relate. :sad2: lately i've been misreading EVERYTHING with the opposite sex. :doh: it's okay... i'm still having fun :)

    but yea... try not to assume that she's canceling. to be honest, i set dates fairly close together, unless it's a big event that i'm inviting a lot of friends to. :dunno: soo, if a guy were to ask me on monday if i wanted to go out on friday, you'd bet i'd call him to confirm :)... he'd be ON my mind every day :)
     
  10. Verene

    Verene New Member

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    I am excited about going on a date, that's why I get paranoid about having something wrong. Plus I like being able to "plan" I guess and I do that by talking. Though truth be told, I will call the guy he doesn't have to call me. I just want to have phone/e-mail/IM/In-person comfirmation and communication between setting up a date and the date actually happening.
     
  11. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    just stick to your guns dont let them pull that call me shit !

    if they want to call you, so be it.
     
  12. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Bingo!

    No woman who has a high interest level in you is going to pull this BS game with you. They're going to set a date in their calendar, be it on paper or in their head, and they are going to be looking forward to it all week. They will be ready to go and looking their best.

    The women who says "Call me back and confirm" is saying something like:

    > My boyfriend might take me out, but if he doesn't you're my backup for a free meal
    > My boyfriend may be working late, so I can sneak out and cheat on him.
    > I am waiting to see if another guy comes along who is better than you
    > I gave my number to 4 other guys, and I will pick the best date once I have heard from everyone
    > I might decide to sleep all night since you're not that cool
    > If Sex in the City is on, and I haven't seen it, I'm going to watch it instead
    > The poolboy might stay later than usual and I want to screw him

    Basically, you are her LAST RESORT and that's a really BAD sign.

    If a woman tells me to call her, I tell her it's off. Right then and there. Something along the lines of "I can't do that. I tell you what, instead of going out, why don't you call me when you get things figured out." and I toss her number. If a woman cannot remember when we are supposed to go on a date, why would that be a good sign?

    When I set up a date with a woman, I will tell her that I will call her, or she can call me, *if* something comes up and we need to cancel. Otherwise, I will see you there. ;)
     
  13. BlazinBlazer Guy

    BlazinBlazer Guy Witness to The De-Evolution of Mankind.

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    A.K.A. "Trust Issues."

    Frankly if a girl doesn't give me a valid REASON that she wants me to remind her of the date (I get kinda busy, etc.), I look at it as if she doesn't trust me enough to think I'll show up when I say I will. That is never a good sign, IMO.
     
  14. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    god poco diablo you are the shit. i like people who tell it how it is all the time, every time.
     
  15. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Thanks. I try, but I'm not always right either, so take all advice with a grain of salt. What works for me may not work for you, and vice versa. I do try to bottom-line it, though!

    This could also be a VERY valid reason:

    But at the same time, that is something that I don't want to put up with. If she cannot give me the benefit of the doubt, then she's possibly not interested enough in me. I do my best to date (or ask out) women who have a very high interest level in me. It saves a lot of time and BS. If a woman says "call and confirm" to me I start backing off fast. When I ask a woman on a date, usually it's going to be in 1-2 days max, and for a time frame that small there should be no reason to "confirm" unless you need to cancel for some emergency reason.
     
  16. Riconosuave

    Riconosuave New Member

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    I'm sure that this woman has lots of other guys calling her ... she is gorgeous. I'm also fairly confident that her interest level is pretty high. I'm not going to give this too much thought anymore, cause thinking too much always gets me in trouble. I'm going with the flow with a positive attitude, and we'll see how it goes.
     
  17. dark cloud

    dark cloud New Member

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    I think Poco is right as usual.
     
  18. keleko

    keleko yes, he is

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    i'm gonna have to go with poco's words as well here
     
  19. Riconosuave

    Riconosuave New Member

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    My original thoughts were similar to Poco's. The last girl I dated did the same d@#n thing! Long story short, after a while, I wasn't believing anything she said. She was definitely still involved with her ex some how ... would never let me go over to her place. Anyways, I don't know why I was stressing. This woman seems very cool, and everything is all set. This is the first time in a long while that I'm actually very excited and optimistic about a date. I just hate calling too much! Always appreciate the input guys/gals!
     
  20. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    They are also going to want to have a reason to talk to you.

    As a female... I can definately say:

    If a girl wasn't interested to the point she may not be going... she would not

    1. make plans that far ahead of time because she may not want that obligation. She'd schedule closer to the day or last minute regularly.

    also not
    2. ask you to call and remind her or to call to confirm. She'd just leave it at that so she'd have a reason to say she forgot about it. I mean... if you don't want to talk to her during the week she must not mean that much to you. (??)


    Sometimes ladies just aren't that aggressive and are looking for a reason to talk to you without scaring you off too soon. You don't like to talk? Most females I know are looking for more than just going on a date then... "see you next week." I'm thinking you're being a bit unnecessarily too defensive.
     
  21. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Calling a hot chick too much is a definate turn-off, as is calling her too soon after you get her number. Women like that you have to almost ignore.

    If she's a hottie, you may want to check out David DeAngelo's stuff. He advises to be cocky and funny, which basically means don't let her get away with shit. She doesn't call you? You nail her in a funny way. "Hey, what's your problem? You know it's polite to call someone back. I mean, it's not like I'm your parole officer and you need to avoid me. Sheesh." (Or whatever.)

    Don't be desperate, clingy, etc., with hot women. Make them work for YOUR time.
     
  22. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    I don't disagree with everything you say but just certain things. This for one is complete :bsflag:
     
  23. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Sure, but I think I mentioned that it's smart to set up a date only 1-2 days max before you go out. Talking on the phone (or email, or Internet ... hello!) is completely different than in person. I don't want to make you wait a week, of course, but I also don't want to chit chat online for a week either - that doesn't allow me to show who I really am in person.

    Here I sound like a cool guy who has my act together. Maybe on the phone I'm an incorrigible flirt, but then you meet me in person and I have bad breath and am too shy to talk to you in person. And the same is true for women. I've had amazing conversations on phone/IM etc,. only to be met with a brick wall of silence in person. Or, for whatever reason, a lack of chemistry.

    So, the point I am making is that you need to make steps to meet in person. Everything else is an excuse.

    And, Epiphany, if you thought I was the most amazing man on the planet, wouldn't you just tell me "I'll see you there!" and not risk rejection by saying "Yeah, sounds fun, but why don't you call me just to confirm?" in case it rubbed me the wrong way for some crazy reason?

    To me, it's a sign of lower interest level, and that means she doesn't really want to spend time with me. Maybe she does, but I'm not going to set up a date to get cancelled if I can avoid it.
     
  24. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    No one is right all the time, and situation is key. ;) Keep in mind the word "almost" too!

    But, in my experience, this works better than being desperate and smothering.
     
  25. Epiphany

    Epiphany 78% of all statistics are made up on the spot

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    ok... :) Fair enough
     

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