why is it so much easier to give advice than to take it?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by ForevererZero89, Dec 7, 2009.

  1. ForevererZero89

    ForevererZero89 New Member

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    i can take a situation and analyze it to give some pretty good advice, but when it comes for me to take it i just do my own thing and hope for the best. can i get some opinions on why i might do this?
     
  2. Meblue

    Meblue New Member

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    because your feelings arnt controlled by reason

    if you love, care about, miss, etc someone than any rational thought saying you need to do otherwise often doesn't suffice.

    It often takes a shit load of pain and will power to do the right thing.

    The thing is some people don't have emotions such as this, they manage just to go through life not caring about anyone.
     
  3. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    Because deep down we're all arrogant assholes who think we know better than everyone else.
     
  4. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    The same reason it's easier to tell someone to get off of drugs than to actually get off of drugs yourself. The chemical effects of addiction.
     
  5. CorpseStreet

    CorpseStreet New Member

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    People are spineless or don't actually care for advice if it isn't what they want to hear.
     
  6. Redliner567

    Redliner567 Active Member

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    this. good post.
     
  7. TheStickman

    TheStickman Stump

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    It's easier to believe that you have all the answers than it is to believe that you need help from someone else.

    Especially when it comes to sex.
     
  8. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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    I personally would not take advice from someone over the internet...
     
  9. peoplescar

    peoplescar Guest

    I do the same thing :rofl:
     
  10. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    I don't want to go into this here because I fear it would be a huge thread derailment, but I am exceptionally curious about this post.
     
  11. Meblue

    Meblue New Member

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    people often know what they need to do, but just need reasurance, your mind can become a lonely place. An internet full of people that are 'experts' (i use that word losely, but most in this board are very smart) on the subject is a good place to start.
     
  12. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Yeah, I wonder why.

    No, there the advice is obvious and the follow-through is at fault. But follow-through is beside the point in this thread.

    The advice itself is much better when I give it to other people than when I try to give it to myself. I have encountered so much subjective bias that I've begun to think, "What would I tell me if I weren't me?" by default.

    It's not just me. The advice that others give me is also much better than the advice they give themselves.

    Apparently it's just really, really hard to reason from the I-perspective.
     
  13. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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    There really is not a right or wrong answer....

    Im gonna be honest and say most of what people have posted so far has been extreemly one sided in trying to make themselves look better....

    Its hard to make a clear path or good advice based soley on what someone posted on their idea of the situation. There are like a bazillion sides to every story..

    its hardly ever.... she/he cheated on me.. give it another chance or let it go. Because even then some people diserve 2nd chances... But not most.
     
  14. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    So your argument is against taking advice in general? :confused:

    Of course there are lots of variables in any situation and no one (including the people involved) can fully comprehend all of them. But if we don't take other people's perspectives into consideration, how can we ever hope to achieve even a partial sense of objectivity?
     
  15. ForevererZero89

    ForevererZero89 New Member

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    my good buddy gave me advice, but because of how i felt about the situation i didn't take his advice and i ended up regretting it. has anyone have had that happen to them?
     
  16. infinite.purple

    infinite.purple New Member

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    because often the right/smart/responsible choice is the hardest and the one we least want to make :dunno:

    edit: also everyone likes to think that they are the exception to the rule... "i should probably stay away from this guy because of X & Y, but this is DIFFERENT"
     
  17. CorpseStreet

    CorpseStreet New Member

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    why do you post in here at all if this is an advice based subforum?
     
  18. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh dont tell her
     
  19. greenpillow

    greenpillow New Member

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    if people post all the details insted of the ones that make them look better then im sure advice would more helpful then just genereric dump the person and move on.
     
  20. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Because you're emotionally (chemically) invested in the outcome when it deals with you.

    Look at all the threads where the correct course of action is "dump her, she's a slut" or whatever. But then the people who give that advice, when they are in the same situation, try to come up with 11ty billion other courses of action other than "dumping her" because they are afraid of the pain that it will cause.

    It's like how it's easy to say "dude, just stop using heroin." But the user cannot just stop even tho he knows that is the best course of action.
     
  21. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    That's the problem with your analogy.
     
  22. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    seems kind of a weird thing to say in here.
     
  23. speedy

    speedy New Member

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    My little sister recently got dumped by her boyfriend of 5 years. I gave her a lot of advice & we talked about it a lot. 1 month later my GF of 2 years dumps me, haha. I reminded myself what I told my sis & stuck to my own advice. It is an interesting contrast seeing things from both ends of the spectrum, especially so quickly. It is one thing to watch footage of a hurricane on the news, it's totally different when you're in the eye of the storm.
     
  24. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    well-timed!
     
  25. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    So if woman said her husband beats her, you'd tell her you need to know more about their relationship before you advise her to leave his ass?
     

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