Why is it so much easier for women?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by purebad, Apr 4, 2007.

  1. purebad

    purebad I don't need your approval, right?

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    Alright, I recently was dumped by my girlfriend, and treated like shit during the process, and a few weeks later she is already dating someone else. So I started thinking, and I realized every relationship I have seen with people I know after a breakup, girls usually find a way to rebound back relatively quickly, and are dating again in no time, even if they aren't "looking". Mean while the guys are left, and have a much harder time meeting another girl that fits the bill. Any comments/insight on this.

    and for the record I hate the whole if you are looking for it, you won't find it premise
     
  2. Barbie™

    Barbie™ New Member

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    That's sucky, sorry.

    I dumped my boyfriend in November of 05 for a few reasons, and i've been single since... although i've been on a few dates.

    I'm not sure, but I must be like a guy on this one... It takes me a while to get over the end of a realtionship, even when I do the dumping.


    One of my guy friends is in a very similar situation. His girlfriend, now EX, dumped him saying she didn't have enough time for him.... and had a new boyfriend 3 weeks later. Bad thing is, it has been over 5 months and he's still hooked on her. I don't know what to do for him anymore =/ It's sad.


    Anyway, I digress.

    Good luck with everything, you'll find someone :]
     
  3. purebad

    purebad I don't need your approval, right?

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    well it was only 3 months of a long distance, although apparently she thought we stopped clicking at 2(yet neglected to tell me, and lied when breaking up saying it was only the distance) getting answer post break up was like pulling teeth.

    but back to the topic, many of the ends of relationships I've seen leave the guys much more hurt as well, even though the woman seemed to be the one more attached when they were together. :(
     
  4. Chip Chipperson

    Chip Chipperson New Member

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    uh.. duhh because most men lack the skills to pick up a woman who they are attracted to. Women just have to dress up cute and they will be approached countless times and from among those men, they can choose whoever they like most.
     
  5. Barbie™

    Barbie™ New Member

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    I can't even defend my gender here. Girls are bitches, well... most of them are.

    The ones who get hurt the most, in general, end up the happiest in the end.

    Stay strong.
     
  6. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    generally speaking, girls are very needy, and they need a relationship to define their self-worth. Therefore, whether or not they're over someone, they find someone else.

    This is compounded by the fact that there's countless men out there who will throw themselves at a girl. Odds are, the guy she's seeing now is a guy who she'll dump as soon as she actually does get over the breakup
     
  7. LBFilmGuy

    LBFilmGuy LOL why u mad tho?

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    Very true...but it is also true with most people in general, if they are totally alone they feel like a failure or loser and can't be happy, rather than focusing on improving their lives and enjoying time with friends and family

    also, when girls seem to have "found" someone else so soon after a break up, chances are they found that person a while ago, back while you were still together.
     
  8. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    yep
     
  9. Limited Edition

    Limited Edition New Member

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    You answered your question right there. She was already bored with the relationship and was actively looking for your replacement. At two months her interest level was low once it got lower she dropped you.

    It takes men longer because when the woman left he thought the relationship was fine and still has a high interest level.
     
  10. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    You have no idea whether the girl is hurt or not. Dating someone else doesn't mean that she's over it, just that she's trying to get over it and move on. I always liked the quote "The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else" :mamoru:
     
  11. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    Most girls though just have a bunch of guy friends waiting for the chance to hook up with her/her be single. I don't think in most cases that the girls "found" someone else during the relationship, they just made friends with guys that were waiting for their shot with her.
     
  12. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    not true at all. break ups are a lot harder for girls usually. on the other hand she has been "getting over it" for a month already while trying to get the courage and motivation to bother telling you it was over.

    sucks man.
     
  13. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    Because women will stay in a relationship long after she is done with it. By the time she got around to dumping you, she had been past it for a while, hence why you were treated like shit.
     
  14. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    I think most girls get a rebounder guy because they don't want to appear to their ex and others that she may be hurt about the break-up.

    I think a lot of girls just want to be with someone just to say they have someone..kind of crappy really

    sorry about your situation
     
  15. quadracer420

    quadracer420 New Member

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    Pretty much this had happpend to me not too long ago, was in a 2 yr relationship she diddent even talk to me about the problems we had, found a bs reason to break, up had a bf whom she was fucking the next day. fucking kunt. Oh and i found out she lied to me about a bunch of stuff thats real fucked up which helped me get over her real quick its hard to care about someone when you hate them and want to ki......... umm kiss them yah thats word i ment kiss them :squint: ANY ways be happy your FREE:bowdown: :naughty: :wavey:
     
  16. purebad

    purebad I don't need your approval, right?

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    yeah, the hate definitely helped me move on, but I don't like being free :( in my 21 years it was my first relationship, and it was just amazing to know that I had someone who I could always talk to, and who was just as eager to talk to me as I was to her. Someone who shared so much in common, that you didn't feel like you had weird habits anymore..... sigh. I guess I'm going to end up just a needy relationship person :o
     
  17. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    I have thought about writing a thesis paper on this exact subject, just because I've thought about it too.

    I have broken up with almost every guy I've ever dated, and almost every time I felt that I wanted to just be single for awhile before meeting someone new....but then within a few weeks either a guy I knew or some new guy would come out of the woodwork and express his interest in me, and why should I turn down someone who at least intrigues me?

    However, I have also seen this go both ways (the guy dumps the girl and immediately starts dating/screwing others), but you are right, I too think it's more a girl thing. Basically all I've gotten from it is that women just want to BE with someone, to feel validation, to feel any kind of love. You probably were a very nice guy but for some reason or another your girl didn't feel it anymore with you so she moved on quickly because she had no real ties. She also could have really cared for you, but a rebound guy came along and she thought that by seeing him it might help her get over you; girls do think that way a lot.

    Either way I've noticed now when a guy falls he falls hard. They say women can fall in love over and over again (lots of women wear their heart on their sleeve), while men tend to have a first love or a last love (the women they marry and possibly stay with). My only advice is just that you have to move on, you can never beat yourself up or feel insecure that she moved on. Think of it from a logical standpoint that the two of you just didn't work and now go on your search to find a girl that will appreciate you.
     
  18. Tiresias

    Tiresias New Member

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    The moment a woman becomes single, every guy that ever had an interest in her immediately pops out of the woodwork, because a recently liberated woman is appealling: she's available, she's probably "looking to mingle", etc.

    On the other hand, when a man becomes single, every woman around him immediately becomes wary because he's probably looking to date/sleep with the first woman nearby. Studies have shown that a woman's attraction to a man is directly impacted by her perception that another woman is attracted to him. If a girl just walked away from him, then what do you think that does for other women's attraction the moment they hear a man was "recently liberated".
     
  19. HuskiRuski

    HuskiRuski Cardinal Fan

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    these are your reasons right there.
     
  20. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    :werd:

    The concept here is that they were already tired of your BS, and were getting ready to dump you. Your happy ass had no clue it was coming since you were not paying attention to the clues she was sending. For her, she had already emotionally dumped you 2 months ago, so the final breakup was just a formality.
     
  21. NCS

    NCS Active Member

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    +1 here

    also think about this. girls get approached often. its easy for them to 'pick' a rebounder, while its more EFFORT for men since we are usually doing the approaching.

    i had a male friend who rebounded worse than girls but he knew exactly what he was doing. he'd go into town, have a fight, break up with his gf and said to me "well, i need a new gf." two hours later he has one. for him, being good with the ladies was never an effort and that was the result
     
  22. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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  23. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    I've only had 4 relationships:

    1. 3.5 years - I dumped her and broke her heart. In hindsight, this was probably the worst mistake of my life. She's married now and no one has ever compared to her. See my related thread on the Asylum called First Love Called Me Tonight <-- clickable

    2. 2.5 years - It was a mutual breakup, but I suggested/initiated it.

    3. 3 months - lol this one doesn't even count, but I ended it cuz I wasn't that into her.

    4. about a year - I got dumped on this one. She was immature and not trustworthy, but I was really chemically addicted to her so it really fucked me up.


    But you're right, it usually is the girl who does the dumping and who checks out of the relationship first.
     
  24. Speaking from experience, I got dumped by my first love in August of '06 (2 years in). I have yet to date anyone since then. Not because I am not capable of it, but because I just don't want to. For some reason deep down, I'm not pressed to find a new girl or have sex with another girl. Hell just for a good laugh about it, the last time I had sex was August 14th, 2006, at 3:30 P.M. Not that it bothers me in the least, it is just humorous to me to be at that point that I can look back and say I'm not chasing women anymore, and I'm not chasing sex anymore, which makes life so much easier. If women want to be friendly they are, if not I don't care. I know my break-up was a lot messier than other people's, but when it comes down to it, I feel so much better that it's over now. Do I miss the companionship, at times yes, very rarely though. Do I miss the sex, every now and then yes, but I know I'm so much happier now that I am free from a girl that I allowed to destroy me. From my exes own words, she told me she hooked up with a few guys a few weeks after we broke up, it bothered me at the time I heard it, but it hasn't bothered me since, and probably will never bother me again. Just looking in hindsight, I wish I hadn't taken so long to get over the relationship (almost 7 months). My advice to you though it wasn't warranted is, just get out and move on. Enjoy your life and not being connected to a computer or a phone to talk to someone. Spend time making yourself happy now.
     
  25. purebad

    purebad I don't need your approval, right?

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    as a computer scientist it will be rather hard to unplug :p
     

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