Why does she do this shit?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Athlete218, Apr 3, 2009.

  1. Athlete218

    Athlete218 New Member

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    I'm a pretty laid back guy & try not to get jealous/upset over stupid petty shit, but this has been kinda bothering me..

    I'm dating a new girl & we've been together 3 months... she is very good looking (used to dance for a professional sports team) & literally has all kinds of guys trying to get w/ her that she considers good friends (they all want more).

    well... this one guy who she kissed before i even knew her & he wanted to date her hardcore, says he loves her, wants to marry her etc.....but she would never date him.

    second guy is her best guy friend whom she did date for a short period of time..
    there are other examples too, but i'll jus stick w these 2

    now she says how they are just her friends,but she gets so mad / upset when other girls show interest in ANY of these guys or if they show interest in any girl but her....it's like she needs their attention or to feel wanted by them or something but she doesnt want anything more than friends? tonight she cancelled plans w/ me b/c she was upset b/c she found out guy # 1 had been telling some other girl he loved her when hes been telling my girl he loves her/wants to marry her/always buying her things like flowers etc too. or guy # 2 recently met some new girl & shes getting upset b/c he isn't texting her as much and this girl he met is pretty supposedly. she always says how i'm the only one for her & she only likes me like that, but it still bugs me that she cares so much about these other guy friends & what girls are into them/they are into besides her.

    we did have sex about a month into the relationship....i hadnt had sex in almost a year b/c i'm just not really the player type & i hadnt found a girl i liked yet since my last relationship....well being that it had been so long, i pretty much sucked & got off in like 30 seconds :sadwavey: we havent really been intimate since then. so thats bothering me too...she always is sending me texts like "you are soo sexy" "i miss you" "love you" etc.. but her actions dont always show it.

    what do you think is goin on?
     
  2. Deborah

    Deborah Seeing is believing, but I don't want to know.

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    she is obviously seeking guys attention and need that attention to feel as a princess! what is really fucked up here in my opinion is that she tells you all these, no mature guy would accept hearing those. how old are you and her?
     
  3. Dahlia

    Dahlia Active Member

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    Decide if she is worth more of your time or not.
     
  4. roddick

    roddick New Member

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    so you have been going out three months, had sex one month in and havent had sex again for the next two months? Has this been brought up to her?
     
  5. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    yea...

    I'm thinking she's stringing you along for the attention until another poor sap shows up.
     
  6. T-R-T

    T-R-T New Member

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    She's fucking at least one of them, I'd bet on that.
     
  7. roddick

    roddick New Member

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    ^ Yes i agree...but then why is she still hanging around? Are you buying her lots of shit?
     
  8. Athlete218

    Athlete218 New Member

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    i dont think shes fucking any of them....shes very religious & she told me shes never had sex that soon and felt really really guilty about it. i was pretty straight forward w/ her when we first met & kinda talked her into it....right after we had sex she pretty much said she didnt want it to happen again for a while.

    i do take her out to eat, bought her flowers a couple times & a $50 necklace for valentines day...nothing major though. she spent over $200 on my birthday 1.5 months after we started dating.

    i think she just craves the attention maybe? i dunno... i know the one kid has spent a lot of money on her but she never would date him.
     
  9. 96SupraTT

    96SupraTT New Member

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    A person never has to open their mouth to communicate something. 99% of the words that comes out of someone's mouth is either exaggerated, under-estimated, blown out of proportion or utter bullshit.

    Look at her ACTIONS, not what she's SAYING.

    I couldn't tolerate a girl that NEEDS attention from other people. It screams social and emotional instability and will likely cause problems later in the relationship. I'd highly suggest abandoning ship, but that's just my opinion.

    Lurker out.
     
  10. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    Run. Run and don't look back.

    Seriously though, my gf was the same way when we started dating. All her male friends were either exs or guys who were in love with her. I had to sit her down and point out to her what she was doing. Of course she was oblivious to it and me pointing it out didn't change that one bit. She thought I was being insecure, which I could understand if they were really just friends, but exs and guys who are actually trying to date a girl don't really fall into the "just friends" category in my book. Anyway it took us about a year of drama and a couple break-ups before she realized if she wanted to keep me she had to wake the fuck up and stop hanging onto this need for affection from other men. She finally did come around though.

    Good luck. Personally if I were you, I'd just cut and run now. You have to realize that even if she doesn't see it consciously, she knows subconsciously AND she knows on some level how it effects you and your relationship, which means on some level she is doing it to push you away. In other words- she has some serious issues and they aren't going to go away over night. If they go away at all, it's going to take time and effort on both your parts. So either put up with her issues and don't let it bother you, leave, or be prepared for a long battle that you may not win.

    Just my 2 cents.
     
  11. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    Run.

    Run and Don't look back.

    By: Forgotten Spiral

    Its a great novel, its really a coming of times. The way Spiral captures his readers is just impeccable. His constant twists and barrage of never knowing whats coming next will have you on the edge of your seat through out the whole book.
     
  12. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    :bowrofl:

    If there is one thing I know, it's chaotic women (and that you're supposed to run from them). :mamoru:
     
  13. THoC

    THoC New Member

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    id def be out of this one. she needs way too much attention. its hard enough to deal w. her having friends that buy her shit and want her. but to add that she needs their attention to thrive? thats over the top.
     
  14. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    run for your life

    she wants attention from everyone else but won't even fuck you :ugh:

    this has fail written all over it
     
  15. chlywly

    chlywly Active Member

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    Sounds like she hasn't grown up and is resorting to attention whoring to deal with all her repressed problems..... I would truly move on. What interests you in her truly apart from her appearance?
     
  16. Athlete218

    Athlete218 New Member

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    we honestly do have A LOT in common.... & she is gorgeous, seriously.
    there are things she does that drives me nuts tho..

    ie: ignores my calls / texts when she is overly stressed w/ something
    the needed attention from other guys
    getting upset if her guy friends or exes date other girls (it's not just one, it's ALL Of them)
     
  17. chlywly

    chlywly Active Member

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    A positive long lasting relationship will likely not come of this. You're likely going to be increasingly at her selfishness.
     
  18. Athlete218

    Athlete218 New Member

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    you guys always give the "Run" answer though :rofl:

    is that really what you think i should be doing... i mean there are a lot of good things i see in her....but then some very bad too.
     
  19. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    You tell me...

    Would you expect a girl to be with you/date you if you constantly had 3-4 other attractive women constantly talking to you? Would you think she'd deal w/ it if you constantly spoke about or defended these other women?
     
  20. Athlete218

    Athlete218 New Member

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    i think a lot of my problem is i am so extremely attracted to her physically...gorgeous face, huge natural boobs, thin, nice butt. im also attracted to the fact that we do have so much in common..

    but yeah, i dont like the shit she puts me through sometimes.
     
  21. THoC

    THoC New Member

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    i guess it all depends on what you are willing to put up with to have a "hot" girlfriend.

    i for one would not put in a lot of time/money in this.
     
  22. Ichabod Crane

    Ichabod Crane Active Member

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    You'll get frustrated at this stuff, particularly the ignored phone calls and texts. I'm not suggesting she must reply or pickup whenever you attempt to contact her, but just blowing you off completely a vast majority of the time is ridiculous.

    I've dealt with this before. It's hard not to try to talk to her, but it's the only recourse you have. If she cares for you on some level, she'll get in touch with you eventually after she hasn't heard from you for awhile and act better; the trick is getting her to act better for more than a fleeting moment. It usually doesn't work out.

    It sucks, but you need to move on.
     
  23. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    yes you should

    Having friends who are guys is one thing but getting jealous everytime one of them is interested in another girl is a HUGE red flag. If she likes you then she shouldn't care who they date and she should be happy for them, not jealous.
     
  24. Deborah

    Deborah Seeing is believing, but I don't want to know.

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    I love this, you tell him to run, while you put up with it for like a year yourself:rofl:
     
  25. THoC

    THoC New Member

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    its easier to give advice then to follow it. even your own.
     

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