SRS why can i never be happy with what i have?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by michaele36, Jul 8, 2006.

  1. michaele36

    michaele36 New Member

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    I drive a decently nice bmw, It has its problems but considering i'm young its a nice car. But yet whenever i'm not driving in it and enjoying it i am looking for something else to get. Its the same way with everything I have.
     
  2. michaele36

    michaele36 New Member

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    well i'll admit i've never been truly happy with anything in my life as long as i can remember. So what your saying is that because i'm not happy with other things I try to get more stuff materially?
     
  3. johan

    johan Active Member

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    So what about the non-material stuff that you have?

    Pursuit of material possessions is ultimately hollow. Don't get me wrong, I'd love to have a 997.

    But deep down, happiness comes from other things in your life. The trinkets are just icing on the cake. I'm guessing that right now, you have lots of icing with little cake.

    Just like an effing enormously huge bottle of 57 sauce and a massive plate of fried onions isn't very satisfying if the porterhouse is missing from your plate.



    I'm talking about these kinds of things:
    - A satisfying relationship with a wonderful girl,
    - parents who support you and approve of you as a person,
    - a career that motivates you, provides challenge and fulfillment,
    - recognition and respect from your peers,
    - great friends that are there for ya and not phony or flaky losers

    ....none of those things are available at the dealership.
     
  4. johan

    johan Active Member

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    I guess it would be more helpful to approach this by thinking about why you're unhappy.

    I remember some of your other threads and you often sound a little depressed and dissatisfied with where you're at in life.

    You also wonder why, especially given that you have a number of fine possessions to your name.

    I tend to think that having nice stuff...is great but is not what makes one happy.

    So instead of focusing on the stuff, let's focus on your life and your perceived lack of happiness. Leave the stuff (nice or not) out of it for now.
     
  5. illmaceyougood

    illmaceyougood New Member

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    Yup, money can't buy happiness.
     
  6. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    They say money can't buy happiness but I've always added...It'll sure let you pick your own kind of misery. :)

    IMO the OP is suffering from chronic greener grass syndrome. You know...the grass is ALWAYS greener in someone elses yard. Then when you go over there and look down, you see all the flaws/imperfections....then look to another yard and boom...that's the grass you want...and on and on.

    There's nothing wrong with having stuff or wanting other stuff even when you have good stuff. Some people collect things becuase they just don't want to be without certain stuff. Nothing wrong with that.

    Life is about choices tho. We make choices because we simply can't do everything and have everything. Even Bill Gates and Donald Trump have to make choices. Granted..they can afford more stuff then most but they still have to make choices. IT's just life man.
     
  7. mrchina

    mrchina Guest

    You just need to hit a low point in your life before you truly can appreciate what you have. It's sad, but it's true.
     
  8. Jester

    Jester OT Supporter

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    :werd: Get your sense of identity from inside yourself instead of what you surround yourself with. Material satisfaction is always fleeting. :hs:
     
  9. michaele36

    michaele36 New Member

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    i've think i hit it lol. I'm out of high school and dont work. nothing really inspires me, i'm suppose to go to school to be an emt but i might not be able to anymore
     
  10. onslaught61

    onslaught61 OT Supporter

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    you need love :love:

    edit: ^ the one thing money can't buy

    haha but humans always want more once they acquire what they originally wanted. once you get an ipod, you want a tv, once you get a tv, you want a car, then a house, then this then that. it's only natural for a lot of us. I just always think about the less fortnuate people, and that helps keep me in sight of what I should really be thinking about. Maybe it's your environment that is affecting you too. Living around high social class? Don't give in to conformity!
     
  11. johan

    johan Active Member

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    not really. You're still thinking about material things.

    yes, money can't buy true love. But that's not the only thing. Far from it.

    Respect. A sense of achievement and purpose in your life. The warmth and support of a loving family.
    I could go on, but you get the idea.
     
  12. onslaught61

    onslaught61 OT Supporter

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    i was just trying to make a point :wtc: you know, an inspiritaional typa quote thingy.
     
  13. michaele36

    michaele36 New Member

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    I think I finally get it. Even though I own a bmw and have my parents mercedes and bmw to drive whenever i want it still doesn't make up for the fact that what i really want is a girl friend? Am I getting close to what your saying
     
  14. chlywly

    chlywly Active Member

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    posessions and materials will never fill the spiritual VOID that is within you, you are looking for happiness outside of you, but happiness can only be realized by you FROM YOU WITHIN YOU.... Perhaps its time to develop spiritually, emototionally or mentally, if the world were to end tomorrow or you were to all of a sudden LOSE your house and all of your possessions, what would you love about yourself? what would you find interest in? :)
     
  15. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Sigh, yeah that's close enough.

    I'd rather have an average car with a beautiful, understanding, sexy and wonderful girlfriend....than be a lonely king living in an empty tower.
     
  16. killer4605

    killer4605 New Member

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    you need some love in your life... find a girl... you will be surprised how good things can get when you have a SO
     
  17. michaele36

    michaele36 New Member

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    i've been trying too.
     
  18. redna

    redna New Member

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    I'm thinking that the last thing you need is love...

    You need to get to know yourself first. You need to love yourself (as lame as it sounds) before you try to give yourself away to anyone. You need to find something that is gratifying to you. You need to change your outlook on life. You need to experience something spiritual (I'm not talking religious) about yourself. You need an activity that you look forward to. You need to set a goal that is very hard (but not impossible) to achieve, that has nothing to do with status or tangable items. Something selfless.

    You need to sell your BMW because you dont appreciate it. When it's gone... you'll appreciate it. Then, hold onto that lesson forever.
     
  19. redna

    redna New Member

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    Also, this might just be some experimental form of self therapy but you might want to give this a go. The reason i say it is because this statement sums up my life 2 weeks ago (minus EMT):


    MOVE. Sell EVERYTHING you have and move far away. Start from scratch. live in a bare bones apartment with NOTHING until you're happy living like that (it might be a while). Use that time to experience things that you never got a chance to experience because you were too caught up looking for your next "thing". Then, you'll be over material items.
     
  20. Look at the way you structured your sentences, michaele36. "i want it", "what i really want is a girl friend". Nouns are symbols/sounds that can signify a person, thing, etc. In your sentence you might as well said "what i really want is a girl thing".

    All you recognize presently in your reality is the 'thing-level' of your experiences. But a girl, for example, is both sapient and sentient as well as physiological. A personality presents to the world a complex interpenetration of both mind and physique, which you should learn to address as poignantly more than 'girl-thing' to have any hope of genuine romantic success.

    But, you are working on it, I'll grant that.:nx:

    cheers,
    [email protected]
     
    Last edited: Jul 10, 2006
  21. niquesuave06

    niquesuave06 New Member

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    You kinda creeped me out. I have almost the exact same problem.

    I have a decently nice BMW nice clothes and stuff. . .but I still want more and I wish I could just be happy. I have a great girlfriend, too. It sucks not be happy with anything, even when everything you have is great.
     
  22. johan

    johan Active Member

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    A-list
    money
    a nice car
    cool clothes
    nice watches
    nice shoes
    newest super high end computer
    70-inch plasma tv
    the latest trendware
    a nice place to live
    shiny baubles of all description and make
    ...

    B-list
    true friends that don't let you down
    parents that love you and support no matter what
    a beautiful girlfriend who is truly into you and practices neither artifice nor deception
    respect from your peers
    admiration from co-workers
    your lovely wife's beautiful face, tear stained, exhausted and happy in the delivery room
    your newborn that makes you ache with love when you cradle him for the first time
    a son or daughter that makes you glow with pride when you think of them
    ...


    A-list makes you comfortable
    B-list makes you happy.

    You cannot buy B-list
     
  23. John Blaze

    John Blaze New Member

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    B-list(cont.)
    Hobbies you truly enjoy
    Some sort of religious/philosphical belief/practice
    coffee
     
  24. Self-respect? Well Being? Sanity? These come from within, or you go without. :)
     

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