(Its kind of a rant but I will try to sum it up at bottom) I know this happens in everyone's life and that its normal but its wearing me out badly. I am a freshman in college on my 2nd semester and I am so freaking confused. Unlike most of my friends I stayed in the city and am going to Metropolitan State College of Denver. In all honesty I don't mind going there academically but socially everyone is all business and not really anyone hangs out. My mom has been sick the last few years and my family does not have "lots" of money for me to go to Uni and I figured I wouldn't waste there money when I didn't know what I wanted to do. But now I feel exhausted from going to school Full-Time, working Full-Time and trying to have a life. I have managed to not do so well at all three. I am doing OK at school (A's and B's even though I don't study) but I am sick of work. I have worked at Target for 3 years now (since I was a sophomore in high school) and I have done EVERYTHING (cashier, carts, guest service, photo, sales floor, backroom, and starbucks) and can do them well. I have been offered a managing position but work has become so stressful that I don't really want to take it although I would make practically double. It doesn't sound like it but my life is falling apart around me, I don't know what I want in life, where I am going, what I am doing. I want to be social and hang out with people (my current friends can almost never hang due to conflicts) and I really would LIKE (not want) a relationship. I am lonely and feel like I am just wasting away and that it would be cool to meet a cool girl. Don't get me wrong, I have fun with my family/brothers and the few friends I have but I want to start living my life and figuring myself out but I can't. My study/work habits are terrible, my organization and memory skills are poor and I often get yelled for not completing tasks at home. At work I am on my (final warning) which means if I call in sick or am late a few more times in the next year I am fired. I would like to let you know at work I am a VERY hard worker (why I work so many departments) and take myself very seriously. Most tardies I have had are due to coming in on days I was NOT supposed to work and I was keyed in wrong and it wasn't caught until later after it was too late (made me look late). I don't have much to do and the few things I do want to do I feel like I don't have time. I feel like my life is run by WORK and SCHOOL. I love music and photography and am VERY creative but I kinda have no inspiration at this time. Because my mom is sick I can't leave and if I did it would be completlely selfish but I feel like my life is on pause which is true and it is driving me crazy. What can I do everyone? (spark notes ) I am a freshman in college, I go to inner-city college so I can stay at home and take care of mom (who is sick) and my dad/brothers (tons of stress and care taking). My involvement with friends has decreased greatly because we are all busy (aka I am super lonely). I no longer work out (i used to run xc), and last relationship blew up in my face. I am mature/responsible 18 year old who is looking for something deeper than what typical 18 year old thinks about. I don't know what I even want to do with my life so I am just taking random/core classes at school. I kinda want to be on my own and make new friends. I may want to go to another college that isn't here (I grew up in same house almost whole life and still live/work around) like CU Boulder. I am sick of my job and just all together worn out. I don't even know what I want (I usually don't) and I am afraid I will make a mistake with all this happening and that something will give in my life. I have thought about seeing a career counselor (my schools advisers suck, they expect you to know what you want to do). Where do I go with my life guys?