When should you pay for the girl on dates?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by fixthe fernback, Jun 8, 2007.

  1. fixthe fernback

    fixthe fernback New Member

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    So, when is it required for the guy to buy the girl dinner or movie tickets, etc? I have no job (working on it) and am running low on funds and I want to take a girl out on a dinner date. Should I pay no matter what? Is this the case for every dinner date from here on out?

    Last date I went on with a different girl I bought her dinner and said something along the lines of "I wanted to take you out for dinner, so I'll pay" after she tried to get her money out. But when we went for hot chocolate, she paid. Things never progressed with her.

    So, OT, when does the guy pay and when should each person pay for themselves?

    before you call me a loser for not having a job, she understands my situation, and is even helping me find a job.
     
  2. Chip Chipperson

    Chip Chipperson New Member

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    HEY MODS, SEE HOW OFTEN THIS SORT OF FUCKING THING COMES UP? MAYBE WE SHOULD... YOU KNOW... STICKY SOME OF THE THREADS ABOUT WHAT TO DO ON DATES? lc
     
  3. fixthe fernback

    fixthe fernback New Member

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    I agree. I saw you post this in another thread and wished there was something I could refer too :o
     
  4. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    You are going to get responses ranging from never, ever, pay, to pay for the first few dates then start splitting or switching off etc. You have to decide what you are comforatable with.
    In my personal opinion, when I ask someone to go out with me one on one, be it my sister, a date, boyfriend or friend, I pay. I am asking them to accompany me to something, I think its rude to ask someone to make time for something on your request, and then not fund it (I took my friend out for coffee this afternoon). I can't stand tight asses, and enjoy taking people out, I want to date someone similar.
    Again whatever you are comforatable with. FYI: I think most women now will usually pull the "pull out wallet and wait for you to say youll pay."
     
  5. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    werd.
    whoever invites the other out pays.

    after established, split.
     
  6. Ranger-AO

    Ranger-AO I'm here for the Taliban party. Moderator

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    I have always been uncomfortable letting the woman pay. But after a relationship has been established, I tend to go with the "whoever asks pays" as a general guideline. But even then, if I'm flush with funds and I know she isn't, I'll pay the ticket/meal/etc.
     
  7. meshuggahn

    meshuggahn New Member

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    101 time... She gets 3 dates. You pay for everything, but never spend more than ~40 on a date. After 3 if she isnt in your pants then bye bye.
     
  8. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    You pay for the girl on dates under the following situations:

    1. She is your wife and she is a housewife and has no income of her own.

    2. She is in school or in severe debt (education debt only) and can't really afford anything on her own. This only applies to girls with education debt. Having other debt because they can't control their spending and just had to have that cute pair of shoes is bad debt and is a red flag and certainly doesn't get rewarded by you paying for her.

    3. Maybe if you're a nice guy and you asked her out and it's a first date and you're doing something fun, cheap, and it's obvious she's out with you to be with you and not for a free meal (golddigger or professional dater). Keeping the price of the date low ensures that she's with you for you and not with you for a free $80 dinner.

    4. There is a significant difference in your socioeconomic status, where you're higher, and you're sure she's not a golddigger. If you make $100k and she makes $30k, it's ok for you to pay for her sometimes provided she doesn't expect it. This only applies to long term relationships because a girl shouldn't know how much money you make early on, anyway (it can too easily "influence" whether or not she likes you).
     
  9. Chip Chipperson

    Chip Chipperson New Member

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    this man has a strong head on his shoulders. What's 120 dollars on every single girl you want to bang :rolleyes:
     
  10. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Make sure you tell her that you want to take her out, but you have no money. :mamoru:
     
  11. Kev07

    Kev07 New Member

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    This is a good question.

    I usually go for the rule, i only pay for the girl when she has no money on her

    however, my prom date never had money on her (she has no job and her parents dont provide much), but whenever we went to pay for stuff she always said she would pay me back (sometimes she had money and would offer to pay, where i took it [ not much though])

    well yeah she said she would pay me back, but it doesn't seem like she plans to. I thought about telling her that she owed me money, but then i thought I mind as well just let her slide since i have a job and she doesn't have much financial income.

    thoughts?
     
  12. meshuggahn

    meshuggahn New Member

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    You date every girl you bang?
     
  13. iceman1123

    iceman1123 Guest

  14. iceman1123

    iceman1123 Guest

    .
     
  15. Chip Chipperson

    Chip Chipperson New Member

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    you spend 120 bucks on a girl you haven't had sex with yet in an attempt to get sex from her? Do you pay her directly, or her pimp?

    EDIT: re-examine your belief systems and figure out whether 1) taking girls out on expensive dates is something you deeply want to do before you are in a sexual relationship and 2) whether taking girls out on expensive dates facilitates the process of beginning a sexual relationsihp (it doesn;t)
     
    Last edited: Jun 9, 2007
  16. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    I go dutch in the beginning.

    If our dating develops into a relationship, I will pay some of the time.

    Its up to you to figure out what you are comfortable with.

    Initially, you shouldn't be going on expensive dates anyways, so if you want to pay for the first few I don't see a problem.
     
  17. danewreed

    danewreed OT Supporter

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    it varies due to lifestyle changes and my mood; nothing wrong with doing either
     
  18. meshuggahn

    meshuggahn New Member

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    OK if $40 is an expensive date wtf do you do on a date. Jesus the stereotypical dinner and a movie runs 40. You must be a broke ass if you can afford that.

    Also the $40 limit is for real dates. there are easy ways of getting around this...cooking dinner yourself and having her over is an easy one.
     
  19. Chip Chipperson

    Chip Chipperson New Member

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    nuff said
     
  20. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    :rofl::bowdown:
     
  21. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Just to give you some clarity here...if you offered to take me out to a nice place to eat, and pay for my dinner I'd probably accept.

    I'm a straight guy.

    Try activities for dates. Go bowling, mini golfing, skating, walking around on a nice day, etc.

    Movies officially suck for early dates...you don't have any opportunity to talk to each other, and you may be too nervous to even enjoy the movie.

    I tend to look at first dates as things that the people would do separately, but just happen to be doing together. Paying for a snack or a cup of coffee or a game or 2 of bowling should be no problem for most people. And, if it is , as sometimes I have been on a tight budget, that person should say "hey, I am kind of on a tight budget, can we maybe just go walk downtown, or go to this free event they are having whenever"?

    I've told this story before, I'll tell it again. While I was in college, my parents would occasionally want to hang out...I wouldn't always want to go, but when they would offer to take me out, I would usually go. A free meal would make the experience much more bearable.

    Why are you making dinner on a first date for someone you barely know? There is no need to put that much time and effort into it.
     
  22. meshuggahn

    meshuggahn New Member

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    Dude, Im well aware of everything you just posted. I was mearly throwing in one example of something that people commonly do that costs ~$40. I wasnt trying to give anyone date ideas.

    Like you said there are plenty of things you can do that dont cost near ~$40. I just use that as an arbitrary max limit.
     
  23. BradUF

    BradUF Guest

    If am I going to do the movie thing. Ice cream + Movie = 15 bucks.

    It only takes a few dates to see where things are going and you don't have to spend 40 bucks a date to see that. I have had things not work about before and only lost about 25 bucks over 3 weeks. Not so bad.
     
  24. b16

    b16 New Member

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    i pay for everything w/ my g/f. been together for 2 yrs. maybe its how i was raise..i feel more comfortable paying. almost like i have to or something.
     
  25. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    thats the biggest load of crap

    The vast majority of the time, the man does the inviting
     

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