So I was with this girl for 2 years. I loved her more than life itself. I can't stand why I would do this, but in September, I cheated on her with some girl. A girl I'm not really attracted to in any way. I did it 3 times, and after each time, I felt like dying. Last week, she found out, and I lied to her and told her I didn't do anything. I had finally convinced her that I didn't do anything, then just a few days ago, the girl I did stuff with, confessed to her, and my girlfriend talked to her, and knew I was lying. I finally admitted it, and I can't stand it. I haven't eaten in 2 days, and I can't bare to look at anything because everything around me reminds me of her. How could I do something so horrible to someone I love so much? I wanted to spend my entire life with her, and yet I screwed it up. I don't know what was going through my head. There's something wrong with me, and I want to fix it. What's wrong with me?