SRS what should i do?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Xtort, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    two weeks ago i was talking to a female "friend" on msn and she seemed to be in a bitchy mood. i know it was defanetly a bad choice of words on my part, but i said to her "wtf is up with you today?" and very shortly after that she blocked me. 2 days later she unblocks me and i asked her why she blocked me and she said "when you figure it out, let me know". sure it seems like a stupid question to ask, but me and her have been very close friends for a couple years and i didnt think what i said was bad enough to merit being blocked for 3 days

    since then she hasnt replied to anything ive sent to her, weither it be e-mail, text msg, instant msg etc. normally i could just go see her, but shes attending university in the netherlands...so you can imagine that would be tricky to do. i know shes not just busy because shes always updating her facebook and talking to everyone else etc.

    a few days ago i just stopped trying to get a hold of her alltogethor. but i really want to talk to her and sort all this out.

    what should i do, just wait for her to contact me?


    and yes i do have feelings for her :hsd:
     
  2. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    University life brings a lot of pressure along with it to say the least, so let me tell you what happens

    You work hard, you are very stressed, bad results then you come home and then someone starts to yell at you over msn, now from your lovely life its seems absurd, but from her hell on earth its only imaginable that the last thing she was looking for was that yelling reply, so in other words the softer you are to people, the nicer the experience, for example , i am your boss, i start yelling what a stupid fucking cunt you are for coming late this morning. Now your first reaction would probably to land a punch in my face, but what i wanted to show you , is that people 'do NOT' appreciate being treated like a dog. And i agree it wasn't so rediculously insensetive, but here's the clue.

    Some people expect that you know 'exactly' what is going on in their lives and what they are thinking, however you don't have a crystal ball to know what her feelings are, so to me in my eyes you failed to communicate with her in a decent way.

    Especially if you want to be her partner you cannot be insensetive to her feelings, take my advice and only bring love and light into the lives of the people that you know.

    I would tune down the 'cursing' even if it sounds exaggerated, i would go ask her something like 'what happend?' , so you basically ask what is going on her life. Don't get me wrong i think you tried doing that, but try it again in a less rude manner.
     
  3. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    Stress or not she over reacted I wouldn't try to contact her at all let her contact you if she doesn't you know she's not worth it.
     
  4. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    She doesn't want to talk to you at this time.

    What exactly is it that you feel you have lost?
     
  5. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    well i wouldnt say that ive "lost" anything, unless ofcourse she is really mad, then i might have lost a friend..but that would be a bit extreme i think....im just really frustrated that she reacted this this way, after we've been good friends for a long time and been through a lot together
     
  6. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    I apreshiate what you've said...but i wasnt really yelling at her. she was being rude to me and i was trying to asking her what her problem was and in the situation i didnt think she would take "wtf" so bad. espically after she was being rude to me. like really, it said "wtf", not "what the fuck".
     
  7. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    i think you are right
     
  8. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    I'm having a hard time seeing this from your point of view.

    Maybe because I'm a "fuck me? Fuck you!" type of guy. If someone makes it clear they don't want to spend time with me, then I don't want to spend time with them.
     
  9. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    what dont you understand about my point of view?
     
  10. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    She's your friend for several years and you like her. You've friendzoned yourself. I suggest you try to move on and date other women. This time, don't friendzone yourself and ask these girls out on dates within 3 meetings.
     
  11. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    yes, but nothing wrong with wanting to salvage our friendship
     
  12. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    If you two truly have a friendship, you won't need to salvage it.
     
  13. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Yeah....I obviously have never met either of you, but this sounds pretty much like you've been oblivious and she likes you and is frustrated because like most girls she's hoping you will make the first move so that she doesn't have to put herself out there. Her blocking you is a way of self preservation. If you like this girl why don't you just fucking tell her? It should solve things.
     
  14. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    she knows i want her already and she doesnt feel the same, me and her have delt with that already :(
     
  15. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    good point
     
  16. johan

    johan Active Member

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    I think you're fixating on this too much. She blocks you for some unknown reason (to you), and you drive yourself half-mad spinning in circles trying to deduce what's wrong, and furthermore insist on making contact to "resolve" it.

    Ahem. Resolve it. You actually mean, get some satisfaction out of her. Right? If you two were actually that tight, she wouldn't be such a bitch, at least she certainly comes off like a royal pain in the ass.

    I think you should stop worrying so much about saving this "friendship".



    If you two were truly friends..no correct that, if SHE is truly YOUR friend, then you can simply message her in a few days very casually and say something like "hey whats up".

    No need for big drama, no need to "have it all out", no need for stupid relationship dissections.

    Because you supposedly have a friendship, not a relationship, RIGHT?

    Well act like it then. Friendship, NOT relationship.

    That means, don't engage in drama, don't enable her pussyhurting behaviour, none of that.

    She doesn't have time for you right now? No big thing. Call her later. Simple. Easy. No drama.
    End Problem.




    PS. Don't think it's not obvious to everyone here that the root cause for your behaviour is that you actually want her, and she doesn't want you.

    It's also painfully obvious to her too.

    Remember, friendship. Not relationship. That's the best you're going to do out of all this. Don't estalk her or hound her looking for more. You'll just get more of the blocking behaviour.
     
  17. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    so you think i should just forget this whole thing and pretend it didnt happen? yeah id like to do that. but for that to happen she needs to start talking to me again.......and its been well over a week since ive tryed to contact her and still nothing and shes not too busy to send me a msg or something, i know that for a fact.
     
  18. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    yeah, we often use sarcasm when we talk, in person and online.

    im trying to make ammends. ive said all that. but its like she doesnt even give a fuck because she doesnt say anythng back and its been well over 2 weeks since this happend.
     
  19. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    In my experience I've found theres no point to being friends with a girl that friendzoned you, you'll always have some feelings for her its just easier to move on :hs:
     
  20. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    im moving on, no question about that. but whether i have feelings for her or not, her to reacting this way is ridiculous.
     
  21. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    i understand what your saying and your right, regardless what she says, what i said isnt that big of a deal.....but in our situation, its prolly best that we work it out instead of me saying "fuck her, i dont care anymore, shes not worth it" etc. and ending the friendship right here
     
  22. Xtort

    Xtort New Member

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    I just finished writing her an e-mail, telling her again im sorry, but that the way shes acting its uncalled for and very immature espically after all we've been through. i also said that i was tired of this and just wanted things to go back to normal, but if she didnt care and didnt reply then that would be the end, she wouldnt hear from me again UNLESS she put forth an effort.

    thanks for all your help and suggestions, they've been much apreshiated
     

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