what should i do in this situation v. im stuck in the middle

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by victimizati0n, Aug 26, 2008.

  1. victimizati0n

    victimizati0n New Member

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    alright.. basically i was friendzoned from this girl, i have known her for over 1/3 of my life

    i did all of the wrong things a guy could do because i was "in love" like always asking her to do shit, hang out, etc.

    i didnt talk to her for a long ass time until recently, and i have made it clear to her that im not interested anymore

    as of right now, i really have no idea where i stand in her eyes.. im probably still friendzoned.. who knows, but heres the problem

    i was talking to her today and we were just chit chatting about general shit, and the subject of movies came up.. now there is a particular movie that i would like to see, and she briefly said she would go with me

    i would really like to go with her, but im afraid it might complicate things. as in she will think im into her again, or act weird around me, etc if we go

    so basically should i not even bring it up to her again, or should i bring it up and ask her when she wants to go??

    she is the type of person that basically never keeps plans and forgets shit all of the time, so basically if i dont bring the movie up, i will not go with her (and she does that to everyone, even her good friends, not just because im friendzoned) so what should i do? im kinda stuck in the middle here, because i dont want her to act all weird and shit, and i dont want her to think im into her again
     
  2. Specialist23

    Specialist23 OT Supporter

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    do what you want to do but don't take it so seriously. your best chances, if you want this girl to like you, is to just be you and don't put any pressure onto the situation. in another words, just be patient and don't let it be such a big deal about the movie if you do end up going.
     
  3. vodkacollins

    vodkacollins New Member

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    why do you really want her to go to the movies with you? it sounds like you actually still DO like this chick

    if thats the case, just ask her to go. and make it a date
     
  4. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Why are you worrying what she'll think of you?

    Do you still like this girl? It sure sounds like you do otherwise you wouldn't give a shit about this. You'd say "ok, let's go to that movie" and not let it bug you because she's your friend, remember?

    I don't think you should bother with a "friendship" until you are long over her and going to a movie with her as a friend doesn't ruffle your feathers :dunno:

    Edit: And what happened to the chick you were basing getting all your confidence on? Is this her???
     
  5. victimizati0n

    victimizati0n New Member

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    rofl no this isnt the chick

    and im gonna be totally honest i am "over" the girl to the point where im not leg humping her, if she tells me she went on a date with some dude i really wouldnt care, or i dont want to ask her out

    but i still have "those" feelings that will never go away.. like i said i have known her for 1/3 of my life, she played a huge role in who i am today

    its not that im worried what she will think, im just worried about her being weird around me.. when she knew i was into her, she just acted weird, i dont think she liked the fact that i liked her, but she just wanted to be friends, now that she knows im not into her, she isnt weird like that

    having me pursue this and asking her if she wants to go might make her think i am into her again, and thus her being weird again (at least in my thoughts)

    i would like to go to the movies with her, she is my friend and has been for some time, but i want it to stay that way, not the way it was before when she knew i liked her

    can you kinda see where i am comming from here? its not about me or my feelings, as much as it is about me not wanting her to turn weird again (even though i dont even know if she will?)

    basically two things can happen:

    1. i ask her to go to the movies, she agrees and we have a good time

    2. i ask her to go to the movies, she once again thinks i like her, and tries to take the friendzone stand, and just be weird again
     
  6. victimizati0n

    victimizati0n New Member

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    yeah, i completly understand, im not really taking it seriously.. but im just afraid she is going to act weird again (i know i cant stap saying the word weird.. but its the only thing i can think of) after i ask her and she rejects

    i really dont care if she doesnt want to go, its not going to hurt me at all

    well there is other things involved, that doesnt have to do with the movie (not sex, get your mind out of the gutter)

    and of course i still like her,, i always will, but not NEARLY as much as i used to.. my feelings are :hs: instead of :love: to better describe it
     
  7. Bruticus

    Bruticus half dead OT Supporter

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    TELL HER you are going to see the movie at such and such a time, she can come if she wants. If she doesn't want to, invite someone else or go by yourself.

    Stop worrying about what she is thinking or which "zone" you may fit in.
     
  8. victimizati0n

    victimizati0n New Member

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    :bigthumb:

    i will just tell her if she doesnt want to come i will find someone else
     
  9. Bruticus

    Bruticus half dead OT Supporter

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    I wouldn't phrase it like "if you don't want to come i'll ask someone else". I'd say what I'm doing, then directly ask her if she wants to come, straight up yes or no answer. If she hesitates at all then say something like "that's ok i'll bring XXX".
     
  10. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    You do realize she acted "weird" because you were (whether you realize it or not) acting weird around her, right?

    So chances are you still having feelings for her are still going to make you act weird, like you are now over-analzying everything. Women pick up on that, we are emotional creatures. If you didn't give a shit she wouldn't notice a thing and would treat you like a normal guy she wasn't worried was fantasizing her naked.

    Call her. Say you are going to that movie and remembered she was interested. Ask if she wants to go. Go to the movie with her or say "no big deal" if she tells you she can't go. End.
     
  11. jmezz

    jmezz layin in bed stretchin my pumped quads for hours

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    Do you usually pay for her shit when you go out with her?
     
  12. victimizati0n

    victimizati0n New Member

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    i understand, but that is NOT the reason why she acted weird

    when i first started talking to her again i still liked her, for a month or two before i even told her, she was perfectly fine then, once i told her she started acting weird

    if there is one thing i am sure about, its NOT because i was acting weird towards her

    no :mamoru:

    last time i tried she got super pissed (when i was in friendzone) and she took it in a bad way.. but this had to be... over 3 years ago
     
  13. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :uh: Exactly. Once you admitted it you yourself acted different so she acted differently. But whatever you say :dunno:
     
  14. victimizati0n

    victimizati0n New Member

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    believe me when i say this, i didnt act any different, other than asking her if she wanted to hang out/do things together
     
  15. vodkacollins

    vodkacollins New Member

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    but it probably wasnt in a casual no big deal sort of way if you really liked her. the way you asked, the frequency, etc was probably weird, and therefore, she acted weird back

    its normal to act a little differently when you have a crush on someone and want to be around them then when you are just casual friends and dont have a crush. you were acting different because you couldnt help it
     

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