FRK What Porno's Would Have You Believe...

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Smoked, Mar 30, 2006.

  1. Smoked

    Smoked $5.50? Man fuck the avatar...how about you just sh

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    [FONT=tahoma, verdana, arial, helvetica]1. Women wear high heels to bed.

    2. Men are never impotent.

    3. When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory.

    4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he have sex with her.

    5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with sperm.

    6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly, middle-aged men.

    7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blowjob.

    8. Women always orgasm when men do.

    9. A blowjob will always get a women off a speeding ticket.

    10. All women are noisy fucks.

    11. People in the 70's couldn't fuck unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background.

    12. Those tits are real.

    13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt.

    14. Men always groan "OH YEAH!" when they cum.

    15. If there is two of them they "high five" each other.(and the girl isn't disgusted!)

    16. Double penetration makes women smile.

    17. Asian men don't exist.

    18. If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes, the boyfriend won't bash seven shades of shit out of you if you shove your cock in his girlfriend's mouth.

    19. There's a plot.

    20. When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite a woman by giving her a gentle slap on the butt.

    21. Nurses suck patient's cocks.

    22. Men always pull out.

    23. When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend, she'll only be momentarily pissed off before fucking the both of you.

    24. Women never have headaches... or periods.

    25. When a woman is sucking a man's cock, it's important for him to remind her to "suck it".

    26. Assholes are clean.

    27. A man ejaculating on a woman's butt is a satisfying result for all parties concerned.

    28. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man's trouser and find a cock there.

    29. Men don't have to beg.

    30. When standing during a blowjob, a man will always place one hand firmly on the back of the kneeling woman's head and the other proudly on his hip.
    [/FONT]
     
  2. bandwagon

    bandwagon Copy/Paste

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    Those sound like limiting beliefs... reframe!












    :big grin:
     
  3. BrokenHalo

    BrokenHalo New Member

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    that was pretty good...

    although some of those things i do find to be true... :rofl:
     
  4. Zak8022

    Zak8022 New Member

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    Haha... me too.

    Which ones.... i'll keep to myself. :naughty:
     
  5. BrokenHalo

    BrokenHalo New Member

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    :rofl:

    i'll share, what the hell this is FS

    numbers 1, 4, 5, 7, 10, 13, 20, 25, 26, 27, 28, 30 are believable in my house :mamoru:
     
  6. BaneBoi

    BaneBoi ƒł٤şħ Ąđđίçŧ

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    I agree, there are quite a few I'd say are true in my world. :o
     
  7. ShoToonz

    ShoToonz New Member

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    You forgot one...



    31. It is a perfectly acceptable practice for a man to remove his cock from a woman's ass and stuff it in her mouth, where she'll suck it appreciably
     
  8. Arclight

    Arclight Hypercube

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    :bowrofl:
     
  9. naughtie

    naughtie New Member

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    :bowrofl:

    Smoked, you've come through again! Man, that is some hilarious motherfucking shit! I also find MANY of these to be true.

    I like 17: Asian men don't exist :rofl: Hahaha!
     
  10. Kirby McSpic

    Kirby McSpic New Member

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    10. [FONT=tahoma, verdana, arial, helvetica]Mine is :)[/FONT]

    12. [FONT=tahoma, verdana, arial, helvetica]I don't think MANY people mind :p[/FONT]

    13. [FONT=tahoma, verdana, arial, helvetica]Hmm, I have something to do tonight. :naughty:[/FONT]

    14.[FONT=tahoma, verdana, arial, helvetica] What's wrong with that? :hsugh:[/FONT]

    20. [FONT=tahoma, verdana, arial, helvetica]My Mrs. likes it. :hsugh:[/FONT]

    22.[FONT=tahoma, verdana, arial, helvetica] I do 99% of the time.[/FONT]

    23. I wish. :naughty:

    24. Again, I wish. :x:

    29. [FONT=tahoma, verdana, arial, helvetica]Then I wouldn't be with her. :squint:[/FONT]
     
  11. TurboKaren512

    TurboKaren512 New Member

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  12. GMACK24

    GMACK24 Active Member

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    I Lol'd
     
  13. FairyTat

    FairyTat Anticipation, the taste of things to cum

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    My favs!

    11. In the 70's a guy also apparently couldn't get a porn gig unless he had chest hair like a baboon and a moustache.

    30. I like to refer to this pose as "Captain Blowjob". I would love to see this scene just once with a red cape blowing out behind the guy as he strikes the post and (in his best superhero voice) tells the woman to suck it.

    :mamoru: :rofl:
     
  14. naughtie

    naughtie New Member

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    :bowrofl:
     
  15. f00l

    f00l Active Member

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    i got this in a email a few months ago

    its real entertaining :rofl:
     
  16. Fire Sauce

    Fire Sauce New Member

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    I lol'd at #11.
     
  17. juniorbean

    juniorbean What the deuce?

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    :rofl: hahahahahha
     
  18. Smoked

    Smoked $5.50? Man fuck the avatar...how about you just sh

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    This can be arranged.
     
  19. Smoked

    Smoked $5.50? Man fuck the avatar...how about you just sh

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    This was circulating 3 years ago, but ya gotta recycle every once in awhile.
     
  20. KRUSTYTHECLOWN

    KRUSTYTHECLOWN OT Supporter

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    That's standard practice for me with my G/F :hsd:
     
  21. Lazy D.

    Lazy D. Active Member

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    that's just my opinion though
     
    Last edited: Apr 2, 2006
  22. FairyTat

    FairyTat Anticipation, the taste of things to cum

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    Prove it. :naughty:
     
  23. qmudd

    qmudd New Member

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    :rofl: lmfao
     
  24. Phantom Empress

    Phantom Empress mmmmmm tasty!!!

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    :mamoru: :mamoru:
     
  25. Vegasoutkast

    Vegasoutkast New Member

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    [​IMG]
     

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