What is this?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by DTR rex, Sep 14, 2007.

  1. DTR rex

    DTR rex New Member

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    My g/f of 6 years broke up with me nearly 4 months ago. Shit was really tough for a while, but obviously as time went on it got progressively easier... but of course having sex with her and emotionally intimate moments during the "breakup" didn't help. We're still good friends, but now that she is with her new friends more and out her parents house partying has become a HUGE priority for her... Which is somewhat understandable since were in college, but she never used to be like that (she is 23).

    Well, to get to the point, she smokes now, drinks a lot, parties a lot, and curses/yells a lot... it is VERY unappealing to me and this helped me get over her sooner. In fact, the last few weeks I was feeling pretty damn good about being broken up and saw it all as a golden opportunity to discover myself more, focus on my needs from life, and grow as a person.
    I was actually very ok with us being broken up because there is no way in hell that I could be happy with the person she is now.

    Alas, I find out she likes some dude, and see some pics on her facebook with her and him drunk together... Immediately I get bothered by this and it is on my mind all day long and really pissing me off. I am not sure what to think about it all.

    Was I just living in a facade thinking I was getting over her and this re-ignited my feelings for her, or I am just being your typical jealous male and don't want anyone with my ex?
    I don't want to assume that all that work of being ok with the breakup was for nothing, but are these new emotions of anger and being rather upset just feelings resurfacing or more likely jealousy that will eventually subside as times goes on?
    Don't get me wrong, I still love her dearly, but since I don't like the person she is becoming dealing with not being with her is much easier... then I see these pics and get all bothered/pissed all the sudden.

    I'm just not sure what to make of it all.
     
  2. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    You're jealous, it's that simple. Stop checking her facebook, stop talking to her and asking about her. You can't get over someone when you converse with them or constantly check up on how they are doing. That is the only way you're going to get over her, not by judging her every move and thinking you are better than her and her new lifestyle.
     
  3. ww_Crimson

    ww_Crimson New Member

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    I think it's just a natural reaction. 6 Years is an insanely long ass time to be dating (I'm assuming you're about 22) so no matter who she's with you'll still feel like you're part of her. My guess is that part of you is more sad/upset rather than angry/jealous. Sad and upset because you know how she used to be and she's changed into something you don't really like. To make matters worse you know the guy she's with in the picture probably was/is trying to get in her pants that night which sucks.

    I looked at my ex's myspace for a while after we broke up but I didn't have any attachment to her which is why I broke up with her in the first place, so it wasn't really upsetting to me. If you don't really talk to her a lot anymore then you might want to try making a conscious effort to stay off her facebook/myspace/whatever for a while, at least until you meet someone new.

    It's been 4 months, she's changed and also entitled to date around, but 6 years is a long relationship so I imagine getting over it completely is no easy task.
     
  4. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Fixed.
     

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