weird question but i'm just wanting people's opinion on what is gay. obviously being in a homosexual relationship is but what else. i ask because i am a straight man and over the past few years i've been experimenting more and more with anal play. everything from fingering my ass during masturbation to letting various girlfriends use dildos and strap ons on me. when these things are brought up around straight friends 90 percent say a man taking anything in his ass is what makes him gay regardless of what he is attracted to. so i'm wanting to know from a gay point of view is it the type of sex a person has that makes them gay/ straight or simply being attracted to the same sex that makes them gay?