SRS What are your ways of not getting hurt?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by onedownfiveup, Dec 9, 2007.

  1. onedownfiveup

    onedownfiveup Active Member

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    So I've come to realize I have a problem when I meet girls. I end up developing feelings for them too early I think. I usually set myself up for disaster and that is one of my down falls. I know one of my problems is sometimes I become friend zoned and that's mainly because I wait to make a move till its too late. That's something I'm slowly fixing. I know there are tons of girls out there. I don't ignore that. But I can't change the way I feel about a person even if they may not feel the same way about me. I get the butterfly feeling every time. It's starting to get old. What I used to do is just shut down and stop getting in that situation, but that leads me into being single and not having anyone in my life. That's not the way to go about it, I know.

    Anyone else have the same problem? What are the ways you have found that help and can make you change from doing this to yourself?
     
  2. triXx

    triXx Im the crack being smoked by your dealer

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    i have the same problem, and yea its hard to get out of the habit of it, i find that yea, while cluvs are sumthing i hate, going out to them and try to just get numbers, you dont have to call em, but hell you can and it does help build that bit of confidence you need to make the move
     
  3. HumanIsFood

    HumanIsFood New Member

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    sounds like you have the symptoms of a co-dependent. i am aslo a co-dependent myself. i know how you feel. and if it makes you feel better... co-dependents are usually the nicest people in the world... but that is of course their downfall as well. what i am trying to do to rid myself of my co-dependency is to start thinking about that things that I need to do to make my self happy. and i think when you are doing well in life and have happiness girls are attracted to that and everything seems to fall into place.

    i am not an expert on the subject but this my advice and what i find works for me. i hope it helps. good luck.
     
  4. onedownfiveup

    onedownfiveup Active Member

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    I really don't need anyone else in my life, it's just something that would be nice. I've gone many years being single and was perfectly fine. But like you said I also agree with when you are doing well in life and have happiness girls are attracted to successes and things will drop in place.
     
  5. Robynchick

    Robynchick OT is going to get me fired..... too late! i alre

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    I totally do the same thing and am working on toning it down a bit. I get all excited when I meet a new guy and build them up in my mind to be something they are not. It's like I'm all high off the brain chemicals... i'm all strung out in a different reality (lol, maybe not that dramatic... but sorta). This really doesn't work and it scares guys off pretty quick.

    I'm now trying out the "I just want to be friends and see if something develops" mindset... just be cool about it. It may be easier for a girl to do this and not get stuck in the friend zone.
     
  6. Yuppy

    Yuppy Have a seat right there....

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    being a sociopath and not caring. moving on to the next w/e
     
  7. Mulsanne

    Mulsanne The Man = Funk Fusion Chaos

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    yeah it is amazing how far "not giving a shit" gets you in terms of not letting people get under your skin.

    Just gotta live for you, and be you and be happy with that and fuck the rest
     
  8. deusexaethera

    deusexaethera OT Supporter

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    Avoidance. Works like a charm.
     
  9. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    You're learning, that's the big thing. Secondly, yes, if you wait too long to ask a girl you're interested in out on a date, then it WILL hurt when you finally ask, because by then you would have built her and your attraction up to a point where you've got a major crush and you don't even know if she likes you back. That's a silly situation to put yourself in. Be quicker.

    Also, focus on meeting a lot of women, not just one. That way if one doesn't pan out (which is very common) you'll have alternatives.
     
  10. DatacomGuy

    DatacomGuy is moving to Canada

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    Wow.. fantastic read, Metallic.
     
  11. onedownfiveup

    onedownfiveup Active Member

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    I agree. :bowdown:
     

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