SRS What am I doing wrong?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Pringles, Feb 3, 2006.

  1. Pringles

    Pringles New Member

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    I'm an all around good person. I tend to keep everything I do and love balenced as to not get tired of this. Lately in the relationships with my g/f I have kind of lead it and started conversations and lead them. I'm normally the leader as she looks up to me as a person and follows(probably normal with male female masculine thing). Lately I've been getting bored and tired of leading. She apparently has no social skills and is horrible at doing this. THe past two days Ive been dead tired and havent done much. I dont talk much and she just "bitches"(sorry ladies, but thats what it sounds like to males). I then snapped tonight at the end and said you didnt once ask me anything so basically I gained nothing out of talking to you. This is no normal for me as I'm a gentlemen.

    What is wrong? Would stress and anxiety cause me to snap? It normally doesnt. Whats going on. I'm going to stop this tommarrow, but is this common?
     
  2. konrad109

    konrad109 New Member

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    As a guy you're always gonna have to lead. If she bitches at you and complains about what you're doing then instead of cussing her out share your "feelings." So for example when she starts bitching instead of saying "quit bitching" or "stop talking to me" just tell her you dont like it when she critises you or whatever. Or just out of the situation. Whatever happends dont lose your cool. She is actively trying to piss you off so that she can hold it against you later. Don't give her any ammo for future arguments. Also get used to her testing you like this when you are feeling weak and not leading her. When you feel weak, she feels weak as well and will blame those bad feelings on you.

    Women hate wussies. They may think its a bit cute at first but in the end you gotta be a man and lead her around. That doesn't mean you're her boss, but a good leader who doesn't necessarily always need her approval. If your girl is leading you around and you are letting her don't expect the relationship to last too long. You always have to have either as much or more power than she does, or she will dump you, but not before she rips your heart out and dances on it.

    edit: oh yeah as far as the snapping thing. If someone is saying bad things about you, especially when this person is important to you it hurts. It's supposed to. She is testing you to see what you will do in such a situation. Snapping is the wrong thing to do. Ignoring it is just as bad. Let her know you won't stand for it but without demeaning her or getting emotional about it. Tell her you're tired and just want to relax.
     
    Last edited: Feb 3, 2006
  3. Pringles

    Pringles New Member

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    Ya tommarrow I'm going to step it up. I didnt have much sleep lately, and school, work, track, family have giving me the work this week. She falls after those priorities, so shes getting me with no energry. Either way I guess it wont work as I'm seeing and will stop it from happening again.
     
  4. Boogieman117

    Boogieman117 PSN: Boogieman117

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    Does she realize the mental pressure that the family, school, work, track, etc. put on you?

    If not, I'd recommend explaining to her that "I'm exhausted at the end of the day" and apologize to her for it. Her lack of social skills are comparable to my G/F; she is the shyest person you'll ever meet (considering she doesn't have vodka in her bloodstream, then she's HIGHLY socialable).

    The way that my G/F and myself work through phone convos is for me to simply ask "How was your day?" and let her go. Obviously, she'll "bitch" about things, but I think it would assist with her ability to lead a conversation when the subject matter is something that you don't know much about and she'll be able to lead.
     
  5. Jay Pheezy

    Jay Pheezy New Member

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    Eh I know what you mean. I consider to myself to have a lot of patience so I never really snapped. If I do snap though, it's mental. And usually I just don't respond until she asks why. Then I just say I'm tired or somthing :dunno: Try telling her you like her a lot more when you guys are just talking about anything. BUt that doesn't mean you shouldn't listen to her problems n try to help..
     
  6. hatedbyall

    hatedbyall New Member

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    how much of peoples crap have you ever took in the past and not say anything about it
     

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