a little preface: me and the ex were dating she was high maintenance and she was my first relationship and i was more in love then she was so i was somewhat obsessed....did whatever i could spent alot of money basically spineless. At one juncture in our relationship she even cheated on me which i managed to forgive. from then on in i was like jelly did what she wanted when she wanted sex on her terms only hanging out with her friends but hey i was happy we were together. So i was going through a lot of financial difficulty i was spending beyond my means to keep her happy and avoiding paying for other things such as my car and basic bills. i ended up losing my car and having a mountain of stress dropped on me. this stress culminated on my birthday, i had asked her to just hang out me and her hopefully have some intimate time together instead she plans this stupid trip to the waterpark with her friends basically ignoring me and doing what she wanted, later that night she broke up with me. after a torrid relationship we broke up this past august (on my birthday no less) and its been kinda rocky since then. When we broke up i was still attached and well i said that we should stay close friends (idiot) cause i was worried about her and hoped (stupidly) for some chance of reconciliation. Not to put all of it on myself she wanted to stay close as well so we have been. SO pretty much i still take care of her, take her shopping when i can do her homework for her and console her through problems. lately she started hanging out with this other dude and kinda getting closer( they've kissed) she constantly asks me questions about him and what to do regarding him. See this would be all fine and good if we were just friends but see when we're together she still hugs and kisses me, we don't get off the phone without her telling me that she loves me. I wont lie i precipitate these situations and i allow these things to happen. At the same time she knows i love her yet she chooses still to use me and continue to mess around with this other guy. the worst part is that i still love her and that i want to stay in her life but...but i hate being used and i hate that i'm creating this situation to be used. asylum i do love her and i do understand that i need to let her go, its just that i worry about her so much, she still means more to me then even i understand how do i move past this and get on with my life.