Well that is certainly irritating.

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Boudreaux, Oct 7, 2008.

  1. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    Back story:

    Asked for a girls number at school about a year ago, she declines saying she has a boyfriend. Cool, no bigge, go me for asking anyways.

    then, at the beginning of this calender year (2nd semester of the academic year) we start running into each other all over campus. Eventually it comes to us seeing each other every tuesday and thursday for like an hour just chit chattin' about stuff and getting to know each other with our respective friends joining us occasionally. I even met her boyfriend and got along with him really well.

    I graduated, so we had to part ways, but she gave me her email address because she really wanted me to keep in touch, which is fine by me.

    fast forward
    That was in may. A couple of weeks ago i emailed her just to see how things were going, etc. etc. blah blah blah. Got her number again because i wanted to take her and her boyfriend out to an awesome vegetarian (her and her bf are vegetarian) restuarant in dallas (which we had talked about at length while i was still in school anyway). That was last week sometime.

    I texted her today and it ended up being an all-day text fest. I was bored at work and she seemed up for the conversation anyway. I was my usual self, light flirting, nothing serious i didn't think. But then a little bit ago i get this text:

    "I know you still like me. is isn't fair to you that you still have hope while im in love with charles (her bf, obviously). so i dont think we should talk. i dont want to hurt you its just the right thing to do"

    i got really agitated fast and sent back "holy shit, is that a joke?! you have got to be kidding" which i immediatly regretted but i just didn't see that coming at all.

    I honestly do not have those type of feelings for her. She is a neat chick, and i enjoyed her company but i'm not dense enough to develop feelings for someone who i know really has someone else. I guess she didn't unerstand that? Maybe i was flirting more than i thought?

    She hasn't responded and out of her wishes i didn't call (which is what i really wanted to do). I'm contemplating writing out a brief explenatory email saying that that isn't the case at all and for her to reconsider. :hsd:

    discuss
     
  2. Horror

    Horror Guest

    I think if you do have feelings, she did a really mature thing. If you don't, which I kind of doubt, then say you over-reacted and explain the situation.
     
  3. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    :slap: I don't have those types of feelings for her, did i or did i not say that?

    :rolleyes:

    so, i don't have feelings for her; a brief email explaining the situation wouldn't be out of the question?

    Truth be told, i think its her fear of not trusting herself, but i don't want that to be the case either. I was looking forward to her friendship.

    ibmassiveflamesforthatstatement
     
  4. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    I think that if I write an email she'll just feel justified in thinking i have feelings though :sad2:
     
  5. Horror

    Horror Guest

    You are putting way too much thought into this. Send her an e-mail or call.
     
  6. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    Tell her she's got it all wrong and you just want to be friends, but if she's too superficial to see that then maybe you don't want to be friends with her.

    Either she'll want your dick after you tell her that, or she'll realize she was wrong and you can go on being friends.

    It's a win-win for you.
     
  7. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    eh, i don't really care that much. I was also hoping it may stem some good conversation about misscommunication.

    in other news, she sent a response: "sorry, i'm not. You still seem to have feelings for me based on comments you said today, but you are wasting your feelings on a taken girl."

    my response: "i did not intend to give that impression, but i genuinly and honestly don't have those feelings for you."
     
  8. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    :rofl:
     
  9. Horror

    Horror Guest

    Tell her no problem, move on. Don't turn it into an issue.
     
  10. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    but my room mate needs more vegetarian friends, lol
     
  11. KindlyCuddly

    KindlyCuddly Irina Lazareanu

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    i'm confused as to why you're shocked she thinks this...after you asked her out last year, was turned down, yet still send admittedly flirtatious things to her while she's in a relationship. she feels uncomfortable, i'd just let the whole situation be.
     
  12. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    i was basing my level of "flirtation" (and suffice it to say we can use that term loosely) based on her comments, in reverence to the relationship i know she has. I honestly didn't think i said anything that would have ever made her uncomfortable or out of line based on the time we spent together all that final semester.
     
  13. Horror

    Horror Guest

    Why bother with girls as friends? I don't mean to be rude, but you need 2 good guy friends, maybe one good girlfriend, and that's it. Move on man, she won't leave her boyfirend so who cares.
     
  14. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Assuming she's moderately attractive....if you spent enough time with her, you would probably start to like her.

    She sounds like a smart girl.

    This isn't anything personal against you, she just knows what could likely happen.
     
  15. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    i know its nothing personal against me, i'm fucking badass, she's end up all over me.

    :mamoru:
     
  16. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    You don't seem to be understanding. I don't want nor do i care if she leaves her boyfriend
     
  17. Horror

    Horror Guest

    Subtly you do, that is why you care this much. It's not argument, if she left you'd be on that QUICK. I'm not being a dick, but she knows this better than you do. You set yourself up for it. Move on man, guys don't need girlfriends, ever.
     
  18. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    :slap:

    subtly i don't.
     
  19. Horror

    Horror Guest

    So why do you care about this so much? Losing a chick friend is the end of my priority list.
     
  20. yankeeschick14

    yankeeschick14 New Member

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    I have to say that, as a girl in a serious relationship, I get really uncomfortable when guys flirt with me. I have a lot of guy friends, but when I meet new ones and they think its okay to flirt with me, I usually completely distance myself from them to avoid any kind of problem. Just did this yesterday, actually. So lesson: Don't flirt with a friend you dont have interest in who has a boyfriend, because you will drive her away from you.
     
  21. yankeeschick14

    yankeeschick14 New Member

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    ...girls can be good friends?
     
  22. Horror

    Horror Guest

    Believe that if you'd like. If you have a good guy friend he hangs with you to try to get with you. Even semi-friends.
     
  23. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    I really was genuinly surprised she said that :dunno:
     
  24. Boudreaux

    Boudreaux Active Member

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    Guess that was what i learned. Even though i knew this going in so i didn't say anything blatant or what i felt was out of line based on the things she said both in texts and our previous in-school relationship
     
  25. Horror

    Horror Guest

    She said something mature. Give it one more time to show you don't like her, and if not say "alright then good bye" and leave it.
     

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