SRS Was depressed, but things may be looking brighter. But am I kidding myself?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Ghostrider4450, Feb 2, 2006.

  1. Ghostrider4450

    Ghostrider4450 New Member

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    Out of my mind, brb never.
    The past few weeks have been rough, college is kinda kicking my ass (1.99 GPA) and I was starting to feel hopless and wanted to just drop out, but that has NEVER been my style. It was stemming from the age old "what the hell do I want to do with my life" and im only 20.

    I would take a Vicodin at least once a day and now valium for awhile, as it was prescribed for my car accident (back pain), and that was giving me mood swings, while temporarily 'fixing' the problem. I havent tried to get any more because I dont want to become dependent (yes self medicating I know = bad). But I still have about 27 5mg Diazepam tablets, and even tho im supposed to take 2 before bed, I havent really been following that regiment.

    But the one thing that it made me do was scrutinize what I want to do with my life and that I need to find it in MYSELF, not a drug. I really dont want to take an SSRI, because that just seems counter productive to me. I dunno, I strongly believe in trying to change my frame of mind from within, but its very difficult when math 1030 is defying you and you feel like an idiot for it (among many other things) See Im taking psychology, and my next course is in Substance abuse, and the inner workings of the mind, so that may help shed some light on the situation.

    Info on me:
    Age:20
    Sex:Male
    School: Freshman in college @ NSU in Ft Lauderdale
    Major: Business administration with a minor in Psychology

    What should I try and do? I had a bad case of depression form ages 7-13, but went through many years of therapy (more than 8) and it has since then resurfaced in spurts.
     
    Last edited: Feb 2, 2006
  2. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Whether you're happy or sad, you're always just kidding yourself. But if you're happy, try to keep that kidding up.
     
  3. Ghostrider4450

    Ghostrider4450 New Member

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    Wait, are you appealing to the psychology of the situation?
     
  4. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    :rofl: Truer (is that even a word!?! lol) words have never been spoken.
    Perception is a funny thing sometimes.

    Think of it this way. If you expect yourself to fail, you will. If you expect yourself to fall back into a depression, you will. Expect yourself to succeed and you have a better chance at doing so (IMO).
     
  5. Ghostrider4450

    Ghostrider4450 New Member

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    Out of my mind, brb never.
    It really is, but I have a bad habbit of tearing up that perception when the slightest thing goes wrong, especially lately. But because of my parents (namely my mother who has taught me well, in terms of 100% responsibility) and my past therapy, I know that I can get through it, but those feelings are getting smaller and smaller with every school quarter that goes by,
     
  6. Jay Pheezy

    Jay Pheezy New Member

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    I know someone like that. The key is to believe things are brighter. Not because you think though, because you KNOW they will be. You know why? Because for whatever reason you believe it's gonna be brighter, that WILL happen. But it's not just gonna come to you, you gotta work for it. And when it comes to you, you will be satisfied with acheiving your goal. Set goals that will make you happy. Work for them.

    Goals are what keep me going every day.(paraphrase)
    -muhammad ali
     
  7. Basal

    Basal OT Supporter

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    i 100% sympathize with ya ghost.... i've been taking SSRI for about a year now and i still get these fucked up episodes of fucking depression.

    solution? :dunno: i personally don't think there is, cuz i could be doing well but i get triggered by certain things that hit the right area (and for everyone it's different). i've also talked to my therapist about this. she said that even though i have shitty days, there are days when i'm really upbeat, and i agree. these swings of fucking mood change all the fucking time.

    i learned a few things tho. do what makes you happy. please yourself, but love and respect everyone. who knows? in the bigger picture of things, this period of time, or lifestage, could be transitional and perfectly normal :dunno:
     
  8. konrad109

    konrad109 New Member

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    I took different SSRI's for 2.5 years from senior year of high school into college. Also took a bunch of psychotherapy and psych classes in college. Here's my take on the whole depression thing.

    You're depressed for a reason. Things are happening in your life that you feel are out of your control and you need to correct them. Easier said than done I know, but thats what psychotherapy are for.

    Personally I didn't like the drugs for two reasons. One is the side effects. THe second was that they numbed me down so I felt fine even though the things around me weren't fine. All they really did was dull my reactions to real problems. You probably have some legitamate problems that you need to take care of and depression is your body's way of telling you this. Psycotherapy will help you find out what they are and help you fix them.

    In the meanwhile, start taking two tablespoons of flax seed meal (ground up flax seed) everyday. Keep the flax seed in the fridge once you open it. Or if you prefer find some Omega-3 supplements in capsule form.

    Start doing some hard core excersizes. Do 30 seconds of the hardest push ups you can handle, then immediatley do 30 seconds of sits up as fast/hard as you can, then get up and jump up as fast as you can as high as you can bringing your knees high to your chest for another 30 seconds. Go back to push ups, rinse and repeat. Mix up your ab workout so you're doing leg lifts, bicycles, etc. Keep going untill you can't do it anymore, then it some more till you feel like passing out, then do it again. Set a goal for how long you can do it, then surpass that goal. You will get a major endorphine dump and you will train yourself to push yourself farther than you ever thought you could.

    I've been off drugs for 6 months now and I've never felt better. Diet and excercize has done way more for me and the side effects are all positive. Plus its a lot cheaper than drugs. If you want to stay on the drugs thats fine, but proper diet (omega 3's) can make a huge difference as well.
     
  9. ebbnflo

    ebbnflo REAL- LAOT Hermit

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    I can certainly understand that. I am the same way, but occassionally that depression really can kick your ass even when you are dieting well and supplimenting with great stuff. You know that SSRIs are not the only thing available, right? They SCAH-REWED me up too. (torticollis from a few days on zoloft, and pretty much suicidal on prozac) I take an Rx that is a epinephrine and dopamine re-uptake inhibitor, and so far it seems to be helping me.
    just another something to consider, in addition to non-drug methods.
     

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