SRS Want to dance with GF at clubs but so damn self concious

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by quickone, Mar 10, 2007.

  1. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    I never usually go out to clubs unless a friend or GF wants me to go. Not usually my scene but when I do go I never usually dance...I just stand there and feel like an ass...if I have other friends with me who arent dancing I feel alright...but for some reason I have some huge self concious issue with dancing...I can't...I have no rythym at all...and I know people are like just go up and dance with her who cares....but for some reason (idk why) this is a big deal for me and I really want to get over it because if I could dance then I would have no problem doing it with my GF. She says it doesn't bother her but I think deep down she would like it alot more if I did. Last night my friend wouldn't shut up about it making a big deal and that is only going to make me not dance even more. If no one had said anything then maybe I would have a little bit...very little...but I just don't know why this is such an issue for me...:hs:
     
  2. ay thunderrcat

    ay thunderrcat You can have all the hoes, I'm gon keep the women.

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    lol... dude its fucking easy, just move your body the way she is... sorta... kind watch how other dudes dance with chicks... tbh they dont really even dance like back in the day, its pretty much just grinding, or the best way is get a buzz and youll be feelin good and start dancing!!
     
  3. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    You could just make a concession and dance with your gf to make her happy, if not for yourself just do it for her. A club is a place where people dance so its not like your doing something that is extraordinairy, its just normal. It isn't designed or meant to torture you, and the moment you don't see it as torture, is the moment you can see that its just to have a great time.
     
  4. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Well alcohol does loosen up people and that indeed may be a good thing, but its definitly not a friend, seen with the many people that went down by alcohol abuse.
     
  5. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    Yeah I know...even with alcohol its hard for me to. Like I said I know to alot of people it's like wtf man..its so easy just go grind with her..I just have some sort of mental block about it almost lol. I really don't know. Prolly sounds retarded...it does to even me
     
  6. Kev07

    Kev07 New Member

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    how can you feel selfconcious in a sea of people?
     
  7. Redneck Shinobi

    Redneck Shinobi Well Jules, the funny thing about my back is that

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    Dancing is so easy it's not even funny. Women have to know how to dance but guys really only need to know how to sway.

    Just feel the music, hell get stoned if you want (you can feel the music that's for sure) and just rock with it. I guess I'm weird cause I'm the only guy I know that has to drag his GF to a club to go dancing lol.
     
  8. quickone

    quickone New Member

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    Probably because alot of my friends point out some of the rediculously bad dancers in the place and just laugh and they do look hilarious sometimes. I guess I think that everyone is staring type of thing....even tho i'm sure they aren't
     
  9. JRock10

    JRock10 Active Member

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    if you need lessons, watch the movie Hitch with Will Smith and Kevin whatever from King of Queens. skip to the part in the office where Will teaches Kevin to dance.

    And i get those same feelings sometimes about everyone watching. I'm a big dude so i really feel like people are watching.
     
  10. Dorn

    Dorn New Member

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    When you feel weird and think you look like an idiot dancing around, look around at all of the other people. Realize that for one, nobody is watching you dance, and for two, there's probably someone there much more uncoordinated than you at dancing.
     
  11. crazy15

    crazy15 New Member

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  12. crazy15

    crazy15 New Member

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  13. HoodRich

    HoodRich Professional Street Nigga OT Supporter

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    go out to a club where you know noone and get out and dance like the biggest fucking idiot ever. do that 2 or 3 times and you'll feel at home on the dance floor with your g/f not acting a fool
     
  14. Guerilla Grower

    Guerilla Grower New Member

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    Exactly, just say to yourself, "I don't give a fuck about anyone but my GF" and try to get over the fact that you think people care about what you look like dancing, does it really matter what some random people are going to think of you for the 5 seconds that they actually pay attention to you? Get in the moment and groove with your girl.
    Maybe try dancing with her in your own home to some good club music if you don't think your a good dancer so you can get use to it before going out.

    Also, everyone has hang ups about them as I use to do the same thing when in clubs but I just said, "fuck it, the only person that matters to me is my GF anyways". GL.
     
  15. BeHeadR

    BeHeadR Only Slightly Insane

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    Thats because you're friends are insecure and shallow...this obviously bothers you and is DIRECTLY effecting your own behavior. You really need to get away from those kinds of people, they are holding you back.
     
  16. Skeletor

    Skeletor Guest

    just get wasted and go for it dude.


    Try this: start dancing around jokingly the second you walk through the door and hear the music.... because the longer you sit around watching other people dance and tell yourself "ok i'll go on the next song", the harder it will be, and eventually you're going to build up your whole night into a shitstorm of anxiety and self-hatred...

    I know because I've always done this in dancing situations, and after my I did it at my cousin's wedding last summer, sitting around watching my family and friends dance for hours while I just sat there, I decided I wouldn't be a fuckin pussy about dancing anymore... now I'm better about it and anytime there is such a situation, I'm the first one to start moving because I KNOW that if I wait a minute it will turn into 10 and then I will feel like a huge pussy, regardless of whether or not anybody else cares.


    Also, practice in your room... you don't gotta learn any actual moves, just practice moving to whatever kind of music you like... just get comfortable moving fluidly and and you will feel more confident doing it in front of other people. Just don't get caught, because that would be super embarassing :rofl:
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 12, 2007
  17. kpop

    kpop New Member

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    i had this problem...at the start... and then i noticed that everyone is in there own little world, most likely drunk, and dont even notice you

    think about it - why would people be starting at you in a club? there off dancing and enjoying themselves man not out making fun off you

    do you look and laugh at other people in the club? no - niehter do they
     
  18. civicmon

    civicmon got all my game from the streets of california.

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    it's -YOUR- girlfriend.

    fuck everyone else man. As long as you and her are having fun... ignore what other people do.

    I used to roll deep back in CA with ladies all around and i'm a goofy ass white kid... and dudes would see me with this hot ladies and they'd go "wow how'd he do that?"

    So seriously.. fuck everyone else and be yourself.
     
  19. nost

    nost New Member

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    what he said, just put on some club music and practice. you might feel silly, but it will help. doesnt even have to be club music, anything you can "move" with or has a good beat.
     
  20. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    I do, people do some funny things. I can't dance either though so I'm always looking at everyone else :dunno:
     
  21. johan

    johan Active Member

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    Improving your self confidence to the point where you are able to dance at a club will have many many benefits, that reach into every part of your life.

    Important parts of your life, unlike clubbing which in the big scheme of things, is kinda meaningless.

    But you can use it to guage how you're coming along.

    And do remember that this is all about you, and has nothing to do with your actual dancing ability (no one cares), and nothing to do with the other people there (again, no one cares).
     
  22. trkylips1016

    trkylips1016 New Member

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    I'm pretty new to this site but I know for a fact that alcohol helps. Because not only are you drunk but everybody else at the club is drunk so nobody gives a shit if your a bad dancer. They are just having fun!
     

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