Vag, sayonara!

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Falconer, Aug 12, 2007.

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  1. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    I've decided that there's no more reason for me to post here. All my threads are the same; they fall into one of three scenarios:

    1) "blah blah blah, I suck with chicks, why?"

    2) "I am so fucking brilliant and everyone else is an idiot."

    3) A moral brigade and all chicks are whores.

    So tonight I was out (Bucktown in Chicago for the locals), for the express purpose of talking to girls. Not to get makeouts, not to get number closes, but just to talk to girls.

    There is something wrong with me socially, and I'm not going to waste anymore time posting here until I have opened 500 girls. That's five hundred. And, with my huge flapping vaginal lips, it will probably take me a year to get that many (that would be 10 per week).

    Seriously. I'm fucking pissed off and there's something wrong with me and I'm fucking determined to find out what it is. Let me give you a summary:

    We go to some bar... I forgot where... I think it was called "Northside" or something... and there were a lot of 8s and above there. Can I talk to any of them? Sure! But I blow out like a tire driving over a nail.

    So in one of my many visits to the bathroom (I broke the seal, what can I say?), I'm looking in the mirror and I realize that, in all seriousness, I'm better looking that at least half the guys there, if not closer to 70 or 80%. The people here who have talked to me or who pay close attention to my posts know that I have body dysmorphic disorder, so if I'm thinking I look better than half the people, it's probably accurate to round that up to 70 or 80%. Whatever. Who cares.

    Before I made a thread called something like "I've only been successful with girls who are intially interested in me," and in that thread it was brilliantly pointed out to me that the women to which I was referring had initially high interest levels, but I should be aware of other women who were still interested in me but who didn't blatantly show it. And so, I maintain that I am unable to create attraction in anyone who does not initially have a high interest level.

    And let me tell you why I'm bitter and pissed off. I'm at the bar tonight chilling with two of my male friends, one of whom talks shit about pickup and refuses to study it with me or be my wing because he believes that "when you meet the right person, game doesn't matter" (which, honestly, I have a difficult time arguing against because I, too, believe in fate), and he's sitting there, doing nothing, and hot chicks fucking open him, buy him drinks, and give him IOIs out the fucking ass, and offer up their number!

    What the fuck!!!

    Now literally, this guy isn't anything special. He's tall, and he's decent looking, but he's not super fucking awesome attractive or anything. Yet he possesses the mysterious "charisma" that I have yearned for my entire life. Chicks can smell charisma. They hunt it down and open the person who is lucky enough to possess it. Whatever. I'm happy and glad for him cuz he's a cool guy and I've known him for years.

    Mystery says something like there are three major areas in life from which happiness is derived: health, wealth, and relationships. My health is pretty decent for the most part (knock on wood). My wealth is fine. I'm fantastic with money and my net worth is higher than most people my age (26). But I suck fucking balls when it comes to relationships, and I am unhappy.

    Wait, that's not true.

    I have had 3 LTRs in my life. On that same note, I have had 3 first dates. Did you put those together? Every girl I've dated has turned into an LTR. Why? Because I am fucking awesome once I am able to generate attraction. But I think it was just a fluke that I was able to generate attraction in those 3 girls (all of whom were both brilliant and gorgeous, and two of which were kinda crazy. Heh... chicks ;) ). And on this note, I'm 26. Since I've been 18, I really haven't been "single." When I was 18 I was in a 3.5 year relationship, so that brings me to 21.5. That ended and shortly after I started dating a chick who ended up being a 3 year relationship. So now we're at 24.5. And I just got out of a 1.5ish year relationship and I'm like 26.5 now. (I know it's lame to include .5s in your age, but I'm trying to be accurate here). Maybe I just forgot how to "act single." I always assumed I was lucky having such nice, serious, LTRs. I watched my friends jump from date to date and short relationship to short relationship and honestly, I was always infinitely more content being in an LTR than doing what they were doing. Sex with someone you're in love with is infinitely better than sex with a random chick.

    At any rate, as it relates to "normal" people, there is something wrong with me because I cannot generate attraction to save my life. People do not want to talk to me. I'm socially awkward like an idiot savant. Dudes don't want to talk to me. Chicks don't want to talk to me. I backward rationalize it by saying "I don't find conversation with most random people to be stimulating or or interesting," but in all honesty, it hurts, and I'm lonely. And since I am so fucking brilliant, I should be able to figure out the formula to be successful socially, right?

    Obviously it's not related to looks because I'm not bad looking.

    Maybe by approaching 500 girls I will realize what it is that I am lacking.

    So now, it's on, everywhere, with two exceptions: the gym, and work, because I think it's a bad idea to try to pick up chicks in those two locations.

    Of course, if I am able to get past the stage where I can generate attraction, I'm sure then I'll be dealing with the Madonna/Whore complex like a mofo because I have no desire to hook up with random chicks and girls with what I consider loose moral values are a huge turnoff. But I'm not even going to deal with that yet. I still have a romantic idealistic view of how relationships "should" be but I don't think it's realistic. For example, when I'm in an LTR, I have zero desire to flirt or talk to other girls. But apparently, it's not realistic for me to expect this from a woman in return because of all the laws of female social psychology that are discussed here. And let's not forget how attraction is not a choice. But what the fuck. If I'm in an LTR and a chick who is hotter than my gf tries to flirt with me (which isn't really realistic because I've only dated gorgeous girls to being with), I tell them to fuck off because I'm already with someone. But apparently it's wrong for me to expect this in return. Fuck loyalty. Attraction is not a choice! That guy in the band who rides a motorcycle with forearm tattoos can steal my woman with ease! But like I said, I'm not even at the stage where I can generate attraction yet, so I'm so far away from having to worry about this that it's not even funny.

    I hope this is coherent. It's 4am and I'm tired. But I'm done here until I figure out what the fuck is wrong with me in that I fail miserably in every social interaction I attempt outside of people already in my clique.

    I'll still be on OT whoring it up in the main forum, Wallstreet, and everywhere else, but there's no more sense in me wasting my time here. Feel free to PM me if you want.

    See you in 500 approaches.

    edit - seriously tho, thanks to everyone here who has helped me. As bitter as I sound in this post, I'm 10x better off than I was a year ago thanks to this forum. You guys have helped a lot, pointed me in the right direction, and opened my eyes up to things that I never would have realized on my own. :bigthumb: So, thanks. You know who you are.
     
    Last edited: Aug 12, 2007
  2. glass

    glass New Member

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    did it take you long to write that? it flows quite well. very readable and as much as i wanted to skip over a paragraph, i'd start reading and kept reading til the end of that paragraph.

    heh.

    about this:
    you WILL want to practice on a wide demographic. approaching girls exclusively will skew your perception of talking to strangers in general, in addition to making you look like sleaze.

    good luck.
     
  3. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    good luck man. I agree, do not talk only to women. talk to all sorts of people.

    Don't just plow through it either. try to learn from each experience.

    i know you don't post here anymore ;) but indulge me. When you are getting blown out, do you know it nonverbally or are you somewhat unsure until the person explicitly says something negative.

    I wondering if you are one of those people who just doesnt get body language and facial nuance. I know a few people like this is interactions are very rough for them. A girl can be giving them the :hsugh: face for 5 minutes and i can see it from across the room, and when she finally ejects they will say "everything seemed to be going well too" because she was trying to be polite and they simply just do not get facial expressions.


    last night i was hanging out with a girl and i must have told her smile, cheer up at -least- 3 times. ?I couldn't help myself. She had such a sour look on, but looking back she really wasn't acting negatively really besides that. if you are doing any such thing, thats likely a huge part of your problem.
     
    Last edited: Aug 12, 2007
  4. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    I get blown out because the girls I talk to lose interest after about 2 seconds. I'm good looking and I'm smart, but even with PUA openers I cannot hold interest, much less generate attraction.

    I think I get it too well. I'm not conscious of my own body language and facial expressions (I'm working on those), but I definitely notice them in others. That's how I know girls lose interest in me. I'm not some chode who keeps droning on when a girl is obviously disinterested.
     
  5. Jimeigh

    Jimeigh Every rook and jay in the corvidae have been raven

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  6. JustaMeThang

    JustaMeThang New Member

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