SRS UPDATE on that girl...PEYOMP you should love this one!

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by SovietRussia, Jul 3, 2006.

  1. SovietRussia

    SovietRussia What? You pooped in the refrigerator? OT Supporter

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    So that girl i have been seeing and falling hard for...well she was visiting me again this weekend. a little backstory if i never told you. she got out of a relationship, and told me she wasnt ready for another one yet, so we basically set up a casual sex thing, and it was understood that we could sex up other people as well. i didnt want to. she ended up having sex with some other guy, after i had started falling for her. she told me and i was bummed. but i let it go because that was part of our initial "rules". mistake number one. i shouldnt have let it go. she shouldnt have hurt me like that, and i shouldnt have let her think it was ok by just letting it go. desperation obviously had taken hold of me. i just didnt know it at the time. time passes (couple weeks) and things between us get closer. I met this girl on myspace, and end up sleeping with her, basically to make myself feel better because girl 1 slept with someone else too. but i never told girl 1 about this, until this weekend. she lost it. she had been warm towards me, but the second i told her about this, she became ice cold. we talked about it for a while, and she told me she doesnt know who i am, she has never known me, and that she lost alot of respect for me. all because i didnt tell her i slept with another girl. i didnt even want to have sex with girl 2, and it was obvious to me because i barely even got an erection. so now. girl 1. whom i do honestly believe i love. i will never see again. i will never get the chance to make her happy in a relationship like i know i could have. i can never be the man she deserves. all because of one mistake. she is basically dead. and i am very sad. i lost my best friend. and the only one i have to blame is myself.

    cliffs: i slept with some random chick for some sort of revenge or to make myself feel better, then i told the girl i am/was crazy about. she didnt like that, and told me that we were never going to see/speak again. :hsd:

    told you that you would like it peyomp. i learned how low on self-esteem i am, that i would let her walk all over me like that (i just wish i knew how to build my self-esteem up), i learned that i am selfish, and desperate. i am childish in the fact that when someone hurts me, i want to hurt them back, and enough of the time, i actively try to hurt them (not physically but emotionally), and for some reason, i think i like to put myself through emotional pain. thanks for listening and any input/advice positive or negative is great.

    last night was the first time in a long time, that i cried over a girl.
     
  2. teo

    teo . => ? => !

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    Eh?
    You didn't do anything wrong, as long as informing her wasn't explicitly a part of your terms of relationship. She slept with other people and has no right to treat you badly for doing the exact same thing.

    Sounds like you learned some lessons. Make sure they stick - don't go back to your old ways. So, now that you've learned them, what are you going to change about your behavior to reinforce the lessons you learned?
     
  3. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    Dude, this girl you are "in love with" is a selfish brat. It's okay for her to do it but not you? Jesus man, what kind of pushover are you? Don't feel bad about it at all, you found out what kind of person she is, and she's a shitty selfish person. Good riddance. You'd see that if you weren't wrapped around her finger.
     
  4. SovietRussia

    SovietRussia What? You pooped in the refrigerator? OT Supporter

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    i am the biggest pushover i know.
     
  5. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    QFT.

    Good riddiance...this type of girl will make you miserable in the long run. Time to call girl #2 for round 2...afterall, grudge fuckin' is some of the best sex ever!!
     
  6. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    :hug:

    You will learn from your mistakes (although to be honest I'm not really sure I see any in this post) and eventually move on. I know you really liked her, BUT she does sound like a selfish spoiled little girl who only wants things her way even if she can't communicate exactly what she wants.

    IMO you can do so much better than her. While I will agree that you are running a little low on self-esteem right now, I think with some work you will be doing fine in no time. The desperation you feel right now will go away as your self-esteem is raised. I think you need to understand how much you truly have going for you right now. You just graduated and you have a good job. You have a chance to start your life exactly how you want it. What more could you ask for? Don't let someone like girl#1 bring you down ;)

    I have one question for you. Why do you believe you honestly love girl#1?
     
  7. SovietRussia

    SovietRussia What? You pooped in the refrigerator? OT Supporter

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    because i think about her day and night. i cant imagine going to bed without talking to her. we have been talking every night since i moved down here. tonight will be the first night not talking before i sleep. i would do anything to make her happy. i dont really know, i dont think i can explain love. she asked me the same question, and i couldnt really explain it. i think its just a feeling that you know.
     
  8. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Your posts in this forum have shown that you lack maturity, compassion, and respect for other human beings, that you really need to work on you, and that your problems are about you and not anyone else. But that in no way makes me happy when you fuck up, or are unhappy. I know its not you, but your avatar embodies you.
     
  9. Want2race

    Want2race Fearless

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    you never stood a chance bro..

    Whats good for goose must be good for gander!
     
  10. DiggityDogg

    DiggityDogg Guest

    It's clear that you have some self esteem or confidence issues. If you are so quick to attach your happiness to some external source, then you make it obvious that you aren't happy with yourself.
    Plus, I don't believe you love this girl because you don't even know her that well. It's a crush, an infatuation. Not only do you not know her enough to love her, but she clearly isn't that great of a person and many better women are out there to find.

    Keep talking with us about your issues, it will help you grow.
     
  11. SpectraRedZ

    SpectraRedZ New Member

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    Its kind of hypocritical for her to be able to sleep with someone else and not think you should get bummed about it, but as soon as you do it, she loses it and ends contact with you. You're most likely better off without her, even if you cant see yourself being that way just yet.
     
  12. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    $10 says it wasn't just that he did another girl. It was that he didn't reveal it until after they started getting close, and he revealed it to get revenge when he started getting scared and needed to push her away, or she pissed him off in some trivial way.

    If you've read his posts, you know that its always about his silly little boy ego, and preserving it by attacking others.
     
  13. SovietRussia

    SovietRussia What? You pooped in the refrigerator? OT Supporter

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    you win $10, but i already know that i am juvinile like that, i need help at not being like that. also, it wasnt because we started getting close, it was because she said that i was getting too close to her, and she didnt want me to get hurt, so we should kinda take a break.
     
  14. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    You need a holiday in Cambodia.
     

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