SRS Trust issues

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Kix, May 10, 2005.

  1. Kix

    Kix Jailbait tested, Milf approved

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    So ive been lied to and cheated on and heartbroken repeatedly in the past. My parents have just gone through a very rough affair. To say the least i am very suspectful and always assume the worst instead of taking someones word.

    I have been dating this great girl for a while now, and i really like her and things are great. I have no reason to not trust her, and every reason to believe every word she says. But i still find myself with these inventive, stupid, and very painfull ideas in my head with no real world basis.

    Just looking for advice. I have been handling it very well so far but is are there any others who have trouble trusting people and how do you cope with it?
     
  2. thepornokid

    thepornokid New Member

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    Im sorta in the same boat. I have a hard ass time trusting people, espically women.
     
  3. Repost

    Repost PENCIL DICK

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    Same boat :hs:
     
  4. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Trust is something you have to earn. Remember be like the USA law, not guilty until proven. People have to earn your trust thru good behaviour , its actually a good thing that you don't trust people automatically, that will work in the benefit of your defence , but if a person gives you good behaviour for extended periods of time then its unfair not to give them some trust. So use it as a reward system, the longer they showed good behaviour, the more trust you give them.
     
  5. thepornokid

    thepornokid New Member

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    Sounds pretty good except you make it sound like a childhood set of rules with the reward system and all.
     
  6. I think communicating your concerns with your new interest is perhaps of some value. Talking to close friends, and just finding a constructive way to discuss the issue so that you can find away to touch the core and move through the issues is your best bet. It's something that takes time when you've been hurt before. Opening up here like you have is positive, but it still may be a repetitive issue that continues to rear it's head. As it does, keep opening up and trying to stay aware of it. The healing: It doesn't happen with one discussion or even with one person - but I think that's where you might want to begin.
     
  7. project2501

    project2501 New Member

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    It is almost impossible for me to trust a woman after the expirences I have had with them.

    I dont think I have ever been with a girl that did not cheat on me (either sexually or emotionally)
     
  8. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Oh well, i found situations in life can be very childish sometimes , in arguments even adults can reduce themselves to proportions that make a pile of shit in a toilet seemingly seem more valuable. :sad2:
     
  9. Amanda Renee

    Amanda Renee New Member

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    trust is a hard thing. the hardest thing every in a relationship. just recently i have been become very concerned with peoples intensions and motives since breaking up with my ex. in the last 7 months of being single i have seen so any different things that make me question peoples trust values.

    i never once thought twice about my ex ever cheating.. i never thought he would.. and i think he never did. it was amazing really bc i know i probably wont be that trustworthy again in my next relationships.

    i guess all you can really do is try your hardest to not focus on that. if she doesnt give you a reason to think you cant trust her i say try not to think about it to much. good luck
     
  10. thepornokid

    thepornokid New Member

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    :rofl:
     
  11. CelesteLeSonne

    CelesteLeSonne DEWmocracy

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    i think it's rare for anyone to not have been cheated on... as sad as that is.
    i've had people cheat on me + others try to [which is sad that i know, but i think some people try to do the most hurtful thing they can to another]. my current partner has had 1 particular X cheat on him several times + he cheated on other people with her several times. i'm always really paranoid, but he didn't have to tell me any of it + he's going to counseling to not fuck up our relationship. i was especially very worried after he told me, but he has gained my trust over time + i am doing what i can to help him achieve what he wants, comunication wise + such. i can understand changing something about ones self once yr ready too, altho not as extreme [in my mind].

    my sister has had worse luck than anyone else i know with people cheating on her + in totally different situations, not like a 'stuck in a pattern type of thing.'

    let people show you that you can trust them, not tell you. actions speak louder than words. if people really care about you they won't put themselves in situations where anything bad could even happen.
    if you tell her about yr past + fears she might be able to work with you to help ensure she's safe.
     

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