FRK total noob - How should I start?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by ZSPTurbo, Dec 22, 2008.

  1. ZSPTurbo

    ZSPTurbo New Member

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    First off, I'm a straight guy and I'm not in a relationship, nor have I ever been in a serious committed relationship.

    I've never really done anything too freaky when I had sex, but have wanted to for a long time, I just didn't know how to ask. I don't know what's the "right" way to get the ball rolling. I'm not looking for a girl to stick a dildo in my ass or some crazy shit like that, but I do want to get rough with a girl some time, and I definately want to hardcore dominate a girl. I cant tell you how hard it is when I get a blowjob for me to resist the urge to just grab the girls head and skull fuck her taylor rain style... I'm not particularly huge but I feel like that would just be cruel. I also kinda want to get a girl to boss me around, but the one time I asked she didn't really embrace the spirit of it bc all she did was dictate positions and tell me faster/slower/deeper - I dont want a girl to like stomp my balls or shit like that, but I kinda like the "black widow" factor.
    I've been with a girl who was rough with me (scratched the SHIT out of my back and hips, pulled my hair, at one very strange moment she even punched me hard in the chest) and I liked parts of it quite a bit, but just don't know how to ask for it.
    And thats the whole point - how do I initiate this stuff without turning the girl off or seeming like a bitch?
     
  2. prototism

    prototism Guest

    Scratching FTW.

    :h5:
     
  3. Bubba Atlantis

    Bubba Atlantis New Member

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    Honesty. Talk about things that interest you. Find like minded individuals. It seems awkward, but you just start doing things and adjust as you go. I started with someone knew the other day and we learned so much about one another the first night. We had not talked about things before, we just went into things and as we were doing things, we told one another what to do. For instance you are making out, tell her to pull your hair or scratch her back lightly. Read her response and adjust accordingly.

    People are so fearful of it (and it makes sense), but honesty and communication is the most important thing. You would be surprised how much it works.

    The other option is to find people that are already into that. There are plenty of social kink networks that would help with that....and usually the people you spend time with are similar to you. Thus if you are your REAL self, you should be able to find people easily....hmm, I don't know if that was worded right.

    I don't think you will freak people out with things, so long as it is not too intense. If you do, then that person is probably not right for you if that is what you are wanting in the long run, so you might as well find out right away.
     
  4. HouseLing

    HouseLing When masturbations lost its fun you'r fucking lazy

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    just take it slowly. when you are getting that blowjob, instead of grabbing her head and skullfucking her, just put your hand in her hair and control the action. dont push her any more down than she was at first, just hold her there, pull her off and on to your rythem.

    little things like that can make a lot of unspoken communication. although communication verbally is always important, before, after, and durring to make sure everythings ok.

    small steps is the way to go, dont jump into the deep end right away. especially if its your first time. and even more especially without knowing if its your partners idea of fun.
     
  5. no lol today

    no lol today Soy la bailarina de la muerta. OT Supporter

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    Visualize.

    Define your fantasies & determine what you'd like to pursue. Bring up ideas in here & find out if there are some keywords you can look up to define scenarios you could potentially emulate.

    Get drunk & talk about freaky shit with friends. Or strangers. It's a good way to find out a little more about any local freaky hangouts. May be TMI for a noob, but it's still a resource. Could be a wealth of useful info given enough repetition :naughty:
     
  6. Ideotique

    Ideotique Drinking on monday nights does not make me an alco

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    Talk about the shit you want, find out how your partner feels about it with some leading questions rather than just blurting it out.

    Me and my gf are both halfway between freaky and vanilla but we were pretty timid at first for fear of scaring the other half away. Then we talked about it and it all grew from there. New ideas and constant communication.
     

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