SRS Too much?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by gum111, Nov 7, 2009.

  1. gum111

    gum111 New Member

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    me and this girl from austria became really good friends and then she went back to austria..i like her and all but she wants to stay just friends, which is fine with me. However, last time we talked i told her like 4 times that i missed her..is that too much? dont friends do that? i dont want her to think im in love or anything and/or want more than friendship.

    I'm kind of worried, I dont want to lose her as a friend :/
     
  2. Normie

    Normie The TBW weight loss plan worked for me! OT Supporter

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    Honestly.. it sounds like you are young, and "in love", I put that in quotes because you will fall in love many times in your life.. Sometimes it will happen very fast, sometimes it will sneak up on you and you'll feel you've missed the opportunity. One thing I can tell you is that there is nothing like a few thousand miles, a quick relationship, and an amicable departure that will have you reeling and emotional for quite some time. And in your eyes she'll always be "the one that got away"..

    Was she really? You will probably never know. She could have been the love of your life, the worst thing that happened to you, or even something in between. So if you manage to remain friends through the distance and time, things may change, but after a little while life will take over, you will both start slipping in writing/calling/chatting and you'll forget about her (and she you) except when your minds start wandering.

    The moral of the story is, whatever you say or do won't change the circumstances and you will both have been good friends or whatever it is you were. Enjoy what you had and now have as long as it lasts, but remember don't wait for her to come back...
     
  3. 7960

    7960 New Member

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    She went back to Austria. Facebook her and send her a note saying you'll keep in touh, then promptly forget to do it. She's in a different country, dude. Forget her.
     
  4. gum111

    gum111 New Member

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    well we spent 3 months together, and im not really in love, its just that it was nice with her around and i miss that :(
     
  5. gum111

    gum111 New Member

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    nah i actually do want to be friends with her, im not crazy in love with her, yea i like her and all but thats all..and why can't we just be friends? i'll still find other girls and stuff to date, no need to break contact with her.
     
  6. Dodger Blue

    Dodger Blue OT Supporter

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    I don't have any useful advice. But I think in a few months you'll be doing fine and you'll look back on this and have learned something. Whenever I'm in a position where I like somebody and they don't like me back I some what always wish time would fly by because I know as time passes it gets easier.
     
  7. gum111

    gum111 New Member

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    well she likes me back too, as a friend..i just dont want to be creepy and say stuff which will make her think i'm creepy :o
     
  8. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    My girl lives in Italy. We have a great relationship. I talk via CAM with her. Plus you can get super cheap discount cards to talk by phone if you wished, but MSN and other programs let you talk clearly without any trouble if you use a headset.
     
  9. gum111

    gum111 New Member

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    yeah, we skype
     
  10. METALLlC BLUE

    METALLlC BLUE New Member

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    If this is the right relationship for you then it will work. If it isn't, you'll know by how you feel right this moment when thinking about the reality and practicality of the "distance."

    What do you "need" in a relationship to feel close or connected? For me, distance is great, but for others it can be the complete opposite.
     
  11. gum111

    gum111 New Member

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    well thing is, we're just friends, is it friendly enough to want to talk every week or is that bordering on 'i wanna be your boyfriend' crap? :/
     
  12. 7960

    7960 New Member

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    why would you WANT to do this? keep it on facebook...post notes on her wall, send her a game every once in a while.




    to answer your question, yes, you're needy, bordering on creepy.


    obligatory OT guess: did you lose your virginity to her?
     
  13. gum111

    gum111 New Member

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    its just fun talkin to her, why creepy/needy? dont you talk with your friends? would it be any different if it was a guy? oh and no
     
  14. 7960

    7960 New Member

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    yes it would be different if it was a guy... it woudln't border on creepy, it would actually BE creepy.


    it's creepy/needy because she's gone, not coming back. but you seem to be stuck on trying to keep her in your life in a way that the situation doesn't warrant. back off and see if she contacts you. that will tell you if she wants to keep in touch.
     

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