SRS Too fucked up to be in a relationship

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by BigBadJohn, Dec 30, 2007.

  1. BigBadJohn

    BigBadJohn Pay-back time OT Supporter

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    What the fuck is wrong with me?
    Am I too fucked up to be in a relationship? Now its even harder. Ive been going to trade school for the last year and a half and there are no girls there.

    I swear to god its impossible to find a girl. One thats not a dumb bitch and is actually interested in you anyways

    I think its because I was abused as a child
     
  2. deus ex machina

    deus ex machina New Member

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    How are you "too fucked up" to be in a relationship?
     
  3. BigBadJohn

    BigBadJohn Pay-back time OT Supporter

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    I have a problem getting too close to people im not familiar with and then after that its the friend zone for me. No escape
    That and I have a temper sometimes.
    Too random for anyone to think Im normal

    Just full of hate from a shitty childhood
     
  4. deus ex machina

    deus ex machina New Member

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    Is it trust issues?
     
  5. BigBadJohn

    BigBadJohn Pay-back time OT Supporter

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    Honestly, I have no idea.
    Im fine with my friends, but for some reason, I could even be getting along fine with a girl at a party (well havent been to a party in 2 years because I go to trade school now) and Ill fuck it up.

    It could be though
     
  6. deus ex machina

    deus ex machina New Member

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    I don't know if this will help, but, in terms of girls, try just being friends with them first. Don't make yourself nervous with trying to get their number or catching their special interest. Just be friendly and cordial. Lasting relationships, in my experience, stem from being good friends first. If you just jump into a relationship without really knowing the person, it could lead to a lot of problems.

    Example: My SO and I have been together since Labor Day of this year. We started going out after 3 days of knowing each other. We fight incessantly because we don't know each other too well in terms of our behavioral patterns, how we react to things, etc and have to learn them through arguing and screaming at each other.
     
  7. BigBadJohn

    BigBadJohn Pay-back time OT Supporter

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    i dont know. I think alot of it has to do with low self esteem too.
    My dad is an alcoholic and beat me and was always cutting me down

    I see everyone in a relationship and I wonder what the hell is wrong with me
     
  8. deus ex machina

    deus ex machina New Member

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    I know this is going to sound cliche but relationships aren't cupcakes, rainbows, and cute duckys. So no need to be in a hurry you know? Just because everyone else is in a relationship A) doesn't mean that they are happy and B) doesn't mean there is any problem with you. It seems like you haven't really found anyone that seems worth getting in a relationship with.

    The best advice I can give you is to not look for love but wait for it to find you; if you go looking for it you are just setting yourself up to get hurt. That, and try to see the positive aspects of your life. The hardships you have endured growing up will make you a stronger person and will definitely make you someone who is able to relate to and understand others in a way some people can't.
     
  9. BigBadJohn

    BigBadJohn Pay-back time OT Supporter

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    Oh well. If I die alone, I doe alone. Atleast I have cigarettes and alcohol to keep me company
     
  10. Jbrown

    Jbrown OT Supporter

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  11. dura

    dura Guest

    Start by dropping your negative events in the past. It's all useless and will do nothing for you now. I learned that nobody really cared about mine, so why let it affect me?

    I know it sounds blatant, perhaps even cold, but I had to force myself to do it to make myself happier.
     

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