To call or not to call?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by tamiyaDrifter, Feb 13, 2006.

  1. tamiyaDrifter

    tamiyaDrifter Lurker

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    So I broke up with my girlfriend 2 weeks ago, and the main reason we broke up is because of the distance. We lived on the other side of town to each other and with me working at night and her working early in the mornings it just made it harder to see each other often etc. For almost a month before we broke up I didn't get to see her and she was making excuses for not returning text messages or being able to do anything with me.

    The day before we broke up I got a call from some random who was telling me that my gf was the best lay in the world and that I should give her up for him. So I rang her the next night and asked her about it, to which she replied that I should know her enough to know that she wouldn't do that etc. Then she went on to say that it wasn't a good idea for us to continue going out because "it's too hard because of the distance" etc. I got majorly cut and didn't end up saying half the shit I wanted to say on the phone. I haven't made any contact with her since, which was 2 weeks ago.

    Yesterday, I saw her car on my way to work (on my side of town) driven by a guy. I had since got a new car, so I don't know if she recognised it (I have personalised plates that I carried over, so I'm sure she would know it was my car).

    I was going to call her tonight to ask about it, but I decided not to at the last minute. Do you think I should call and ask her about it? I'm thinking I'll just get fed a whole bunch of excuses like last time. I'm thinking about talking to her in person so I can get some pressure going on. We had been going out for 5 months, still haven't really gotten over it yet :hsd:

    EDIT: I am 20, she's 21, and we both go to uni and work about 30 hours a week - if that helps.
     
  2. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Excuses are red flags, they are the "No" of the woman world. Quite frankly, I believe the guy, because she is feeding you BS lines. If you call, it's probably one of the reasons why she dumped you. And make no mistake about it, she's been trying to get rid of you for quite a while from what I can tell.

    So have some self-respect and stop talking to her. You saw the guy in her car, you talked to him on the phone, and she fed you BS... you KNOW it's over. This is the time to realize she is gone.

    I would also point out that you should stop and think about what you may have done wrong. You may want to check out this little article I wrote:

    http://www.friendzoned.com/forums/showthread.php?t=2
     
  3. tamiyaDrifter

    tamiyaDrifter Lurker

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    I was going to grill her so I can get some real answers, then I decided I didn't want to get confrontational because it would jeopardise the supposed "friendship" :hs:
     
  4. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    First, you don't want to grill her for "real" answers because she's already given them to you - you just haven't seen them.

    Second, you don't want to be friends with her either. That is like kissing up to her. Again, she is not your mother. You do not need to hang out with her. You want to dump her so you can get over her. In addition, if you are friends with your ex, other potentially interested women will think you are (a) together with her (b) want to be together with her (c) stalking her. As a result, they won't be as likely to get with you when you are single.

    This is the opportunity to make a clean break for your own sanity. You need to figure things out without asking her, because she's unlikely to give you straight answers. Again, she is not your mother, she owes you nothing so to speak. And she's cheating on you ... so she's a liar. You're going to trust anything she says? That would be crazy.

    Move on, hold your head up high, and don't associate with someone like that, even when she comes crawling back in a few months asking to be friends (which she most likely will.)
     
  5. huntz0r

    huntz0r New Member

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    She is definitely involved with if not (likely) screwing this guy. She must have low self-esteem or something judging by the way she keeps leading you on, giving you false hope. My ex did the same shit, basically broke up with me and moved on without even telling me outright. Of course if I had been smarter and less starry-eyed I would have realized what was going on and the inevitability of the whole situation. Don't bother calling her, don't bother even thinking about her, you're not getting anything more out of this so move on with your life.
     

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