SRS Those of you who have been recovering alcoholics for a while - help me out

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Toda Party, Apr 29, 2004.

  1. Toda Party

    Toda Party .....

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    This August will mark the 2 year sober mark for me . For the most part , Ive avoided going to bars or anywhere else where pretty much everyone is going to be consuming alcohol. Heres the thing ... I play music and frequently play at open mics . This week I was at a bar doing a few songs , and after the set I got offered a gig every friday night by a bar owner . Playing music , getting payed for it , and meeting chicks - of course its fun. However , the longer I go without drinking , it seems like I get this thought in my head that it would be ok to have a beer or 2 , even though I KNOW that it would absolutely not be ok. Now I am sure I will not do it , but it still scares me that I get the idea in my head . It makes me want to avoid bars , but I also want to play music , make money doing it , and meet women .

    Also , do any of you ever get mad at yourself for abusing alcohol in the past and therefore not be able to drink ever again without relapsing ? It sucks :wtc:
     
  2. metoots13

    metoots13 New Member

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    hi - I was sober nearly 13 years and had a boyfriend who was using, guess who started using too? me - for me personally, it isn't the bars, it's who I'm with and what I'm lying about and who I'm lying to. Usually the only one I'm lying to is myself. I still go to bars to listen to music, what I was told to do and have always done, is take someone in the program with me. A lot of times I go with my sponsor. I've got 2-1/2 yrs clean this time, and I appreciate what I get from meetings, but honestly, I can't live without live music in my life, even though I'm not a musician. So I go listen to music, maybe dance, and then leave, but I always take someone in the program with me. Of course, I get mad at myself for abusing alcohol and everything else, but admitting I'm an addict, and believing it, helps me get through every day. Maybe you can find some clean and sober people to support you at this gig. The other thing I try to do is go to a meeting right before ... hope this helps some
     
  3. Yeah, thats why im only not drinking for today. We'll see what happens tomorrow ( so far thats worked for over five years). If the bar scene really freaks you out, then leave it. They dont bother me at all, but man if i was in a room and someone pulled out a rig, i dont know what i would do, probably run. I hope. But i dont put myself in that situation.

    On the flip side, maybe its just your perspective on the bars you are in. Are you only seeing people drinking-or are you seeing people listening and dancing to music you are playing? Because that is there too, its whatever you focus on. You can go get loaded any time of the day you like. you probably live less than 2 minutes from a convenience store that sells beer. You can huff gas outta your car. The point im saying is that you can get loaded anywhere, not just the bar. The bar is not making you think of using, you are.
     
  4. plasticdwarf

    plasticdwarf Guest

    Its tough for sure. I had a slip up about 2 months ago after being clean for 2 years but it happens. I know not everyone is the same but you will probably think about drinking for the rest of your life its just learning what you can and can't handle. For the first 2 years after rehab i stayed out of bars completly but now i am able to go and not get angry anymore because i can't have a drink. I just look at all the drunk people there and remember how much booze has destroyed my life....that usually does it for me. Just stay possitive and take it one day at a time. I have great respect for anyone who knows they have a problem and actualy tries to better it.
    Good luck my friend <3
     
  5. Phish Esq.

    Phish Esq. New Member

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    That's tough. You may be able to do it, but you have to listen to yourself. It sounds as if your concerned , which is good and bad. I'm not much help tonight but I don't want you to think you can't live your dreams because your sober. I think being sober will help you get there. You just have to be super careful and cautious in your situation, and it sounds like you are. I would process it with many people and look for more advice
     

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