SRS this girl who I'm really close to is leaving..how would you cope?

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by nish81, Jun 8, 2007.

  1. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

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    hey guys :hs: i think im in this forum a bit too much...

    well i'm not sure how this is going to come out, and it's probably a bit messed up, but at this point i really don't care.

    i met this girl in grade 7 or 6, and as we grew up we grew to like each other. i went out with her for basically about a year and just broke up recently. now she's leaving forever and i really don't know what to do.

    she's like the first girl that i've ever really 'liked', i.e. in a deep emotional manner. (I'm 15 for reference). i'm not stupid enough to think that i'm in love with her, but i know that she's more than just a 'lust crush' for me.

    i don't know what else to say. there's probably a lot more that i have to say to actually cover it all and make it sound not-so-messed-up, but i'm really not in the mood right now. she leaves this coming thursday, the 16th of june. :wtc:

    this kind of ended up being a venting post or something. but anyways, what would you guys do to help get through this? (this probably sounds pathetic) :hs:


    by the way, don't reply to me as if you were talking to a 15 year old, reply to me as if you were talking to an OTer. i'm used to OT by now :hsd:
     
  2. Guerilla Grower

    Guerilla Grower New Member

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    Really all you can do is cope and move on, keep your mind busy with school, work, whatever else you do. Maybe find another girl, usually that will keep your mind off someone else.

    The longer you dwell on it will just make it harder to get over her, and it will use up your life when you could be doing something alot more fun.
     
  3. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

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    :hs: i guess from your point of view you understand this more, and thanks for sharing this with me. i mean, after the first five, you can look back and realise that the first was the worst, i guess. i hope that's true as well.
    it's worse because we don't exactly hate each other, and we'll never get any 'logical' closure. ya know? if she cheated on me and i dumped her, fine, that's closure. if we matured and grew apart and couldn't cope with it, or whatever, fine, closure. but, well, she's just moving, and that's no fault of our own. it's her parents' working contract, etcetc. thanks though!


    well that's also another problem...there's no school and i'm gonna be bored to bits. today was the last day. 6 weeks of break, normally i'd be ecstatic but right now i'm just kinda glum. half my friends are leaving on holidays, maybe i'll find a hobby. focus on music a lot. something
     
  4. Jadix

    Jadix The Nice Guy

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    This is weird, because this exact same thing happened to me when I was your age. She moved from california out to nashville tennessee, and it was very hard. She was my best friend and my "first love". With today's world though, its not hard to stay in touch with somebody. I never lost touch with my girl, and she actually moved back out to california this year (6 years later). She has changed a lot, as have I, but we're still friends.

    Dont feel like shes disappearing off the face of the earth, you'll see her again. In the meantime, realize she isn't the only one who can make you feel the way you do.
     
  5. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

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    by the way, its great to see you again viper :wavey: i read your other post and it's great to see that you're doing well again..


    my brain can tell me this a hundred times, and i know it's true, but somehow i cant believe it...it just seems so special. i know for a fact that there's no other girl in my grade that can compare to the way her and i matched.

    and, well, she is moving from tanzania to philadelphia - that is practically halfway across the world. i'm not sure how i'll meet her again..thank goodness for facebook and msn.

    it's nice to see that im not alone in this experience though. what kind of things did you do to get over her?
     
  6. Jadix

    Jadix The Nice Guy

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    I still have a thing for her :o


    I just keep it in the back. I focus more on the girls I can be with, spend time with, and enjoy being around. The few times I do get to talk to her though, I still have that feeling in my gut.

    Love is not an item you have "one" of. Its just an emotion like the rest. How would you feel if somebody hurt your parents? It is definitely possible, and wise, to allow yourself to open up to more than one person.
     
  7. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

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    :wtc: just talked to her for what will probably be the last time...oh well...now things start getting better? maybe :hs:

    yes, but...but...but nothing. you're right of course, it all makes sense. you're right.
    but, you know. doesn't make it easier or anything. :sadwavey:

    thanks a lot! :hs: :)
     
  8. crazy15

    crazy15 New Member

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    yep. totally agree, just have to learn to move on. over time it gets better.
     
  9. Jadix

    Jadix The Nice Guy

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    no you didn't.
     
  10. nish81

    nish81 OT Supporter

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    so just keep living and i'll move on from her?


    how do you mean?
    if you mean i'll see her again before she leaves, then you're wrong, unless i run into her by chance; shes moved houses to sell this one and disconnected phones and packed computers, i couldnt find her if i tried.

    if you mean that ill see her in like a couple of years, then yeah, fair enough. doesnt do me much good now though


    well anyways, I've decided to put all this extra holiday time into learning a few piano pieces, trying out cooking, flying to london, and getting a provisional driver's license, on the advice of you guys of keeping busy. so hopefully that'll help
     

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