SRS There's no point anymore...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by Musouka, Oct 1, 2008.

  1. Musouka

    Musouka New Member

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    I really don't see the point to living anymore.

    I don't feel emotions anymore. Nothing excites or even vaguely interests me anymore. I just sit around, do my work, hang with friends, and sleep a lot (too much, I sleep when I'm bored even if I'm not tired). I have a near constant dull headache at the front of my head.

    I'm attending a good college and I have good grade so far (freshman). I have a lot of friends at school that I hang out a lot. I exercise everyday and eat fairly healthy. I have two loving parents. Yet I still don't see the point to keep going with my life. I have no passion for life anymore, it all seems so pointless and boring. None of my classes excite me, I've tried a lot of different clubs and none excite me. I feel absolutely no emotion anymore, I feel more like an emotionless sack of matter moving about its day. I still laugh and smile, but only because that has been conditioned into me, I still don't feel the real emotions.

    I would try to get a gf, but I look like I'm 14 when I'm actually 18 so that's basically impossible. Plus I'm incredibly shy when I first meet people and always get friendzoned. And I am so inexperienced. All my friends talk about their first hook up or first kiss or their 5th gf and I've had none of these. I've never been on a date(only thing close was prom, and the girl just used me to get into senior prom [she was a junior]), hell I've never even held hands with a girl.

    I don't believe in most religions (buddhism is the only one I kind of agree with).

    Honestly, the only thing that keeps me going is the thought of the pain my parents would feel if I were to end it all. Otherwise, nothing else really matters anymore. I feel so apathetic and emotionless. Nothing traumatic has happened to me recently. I feel very stuck also. I don't feel like I'm going anywhere with my life. Sure, I will probably graduate with a high gpa, go to grad school, and get a decent-good job, but so what?

    Don't tell me to go volunteer, I've heard that one many times, I don't even believe in most volunteer organizations. They're only reducing the symptoms when we need to fix the causes, that's the only way something will ever be solved.

    Plus, I've always been a helpful person and even that doesn't give me any sense of satisfaction or warm fuzzy feeling anymore.

    Fuck.
     
  2. Ricky

    Ricky █▄ █▄█ █▄ ▀█▄

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    So you don't see a point in living ?

    You (like me) have only lived a small fraction of your life. If your life is boring you, do something about it. Sitting here, complaining won't get you a date.

    If you want someone else in your life, you have to go find them. If in person isn't your thing, try online. Many people go through similar situations in their life, where they're just emotionless and really just sad. Often making drastic changes such as a new career path or even moving.

    I got so tired of school at one point, that i decided to take a 1 year break, and try some interesting work. It gave me the opportunity to learn something that really interested me, keep me on the tip of my toes and meet great people.
     
  3. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    The meaning of life is to love and help others, that's the only way how we can filup the black hole in our souls.

    In your case i would say 'broaden your horizon', because that's the only way to make your life more interesting. Just grabbing a skateboard or bike,maby car and go cruising, and stop living in your own little world, because this is the actual thing that causes the depressive feelings, but is also a factor that is denied by your own mind as the cause of the depression.

    You need to brush this off and go do something exciting, mountain climbing, parachute or bungee jumping, reality is that life has a lot more to offer, and you need to do more effort to get something out of it (not using drugs or anything) but i mean doing constructive positive things, you see Life Is more of a test to challenge your abilities... set a goal and see if you can achieve it.

    Enjoy and have fun mainly in the constructive things you do. Set challenges for yourself and test your limits. It might even relax you.

    So the point of life is constant gap filling, and knowing the laws of the universe and using them to your advantage. Other then that ,life is what you make of it.


    Let me give you a good start, in the weekends you will go out and trying to score a gf, read this http://www.jbspencer.com/djb/ and you already made one crucial step into improving yourself.

    Then after that you have to tune your life by making choices that make you happy. Because life is worthwhile if you live it in happyness, as you probably noticed life won't throw that into your lap, you have to more or less force it off by making the right choices and taking action to grab it.
     
  4. nofriends

    nofriends OT Supporter

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    Seems like you have a lot of issues steming from your lack of female contact. Feeling "worthless" because you dont have any contact with a lady when it seems like all your friends do can really take its toll. Have more confidence in yourself when approaching girls. Really, what is the worst that can happen? So they so no, you are no worse then before when you asked. Eventually you will find a girl that will like you and you can be on your merry way.

    There are plenty of 18 year old girls who have no experience either. Don't worry about being a stud in the sack right out of the gate, most girls at that age arent very experienced either and are willing to learn with you.
     
  5. Dabogy

    Dabogy New Member

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    Dude, you are in control of the way your life is led. Don't make petty excuses for not being able to do something. :fawk: The fact that you're 18 and look 14 is not an excuse to not being able to get chicks. The reason you can't get chicks is because you lack confidence/game. The good thing is that this can be changed. Yes...it's easier said than done. Trust me when I say this...anyone, and i mean ANYONE can learn and apply techniques to pick up women. However, only those that really see the value of the end goal will likely get to that point. Like anything in life, it will take time and practice to become good at something. You just need to start taking your first steps towards the goal.

    If your life is boring you right now, maybe dedicating your time to learn how to game chicks is a good thing to do. Just imagine the possibilities if you had the knowledge/confidence to talk to any chick and win them over. It's not all that farfetched of a vision once you understand basic human psychology.

    I'm not sure if you've heard of the book "The Game", but it can teach you the principles of how to get chicks. If you have time, i'd suggest giving it a read. You could also look on youtube for Mystery Method, or Neil Strauss or David DeAngelo. I'll try and dig up some video links for yah if you're interested.

    Anyhoo, will all your problems disappear once you get a gf? maybe not...but having a partner will surely alleviate a lot of your issues. Plus diddling the vajayjay is always fun :bigthumb:
     
  6. I've been in your position and know how you feel. I'm 19 and look like I'm 16 or 17 if I'm lucky. I was a super skinny little kid and no one ever took me seriously I feel because of my looks (short/skinny/young looking). Because of this my confidence in myself was low too. Over time I obviously got taller (6'4" now, I got lucky I guess) but I also started lifting weights daily. My arms are probably and literally twice as big as they used to be. People see you as a person in power then and it boosts your confidence a lot, especially with the ladies. :mamoru: If you think you can't pull ladies because you have on confidence, try lifting. It's a healthy hobby and is one you will find fun if you stick with it long enough. No one likes it when they first start because they feel like they don't know what they're doing or are intimidated by bigger people.

    I just reccomend this because it seems like you are depressed because you don't have a girlfriend or haven't hooked up with a girl or something of that nature. To be honest, most people haven't at your age. They may say they have or make it sound like they have a new girl everyday but the truth is they are probably just boasting.
     
  7. Musouka

    Musouka New Member

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    The amount of work I get at school makes going off and doing something exciting basically impossible. I basically get up, go to classes throughout the day, doing some light work in between, go for a run, hit the gym on mon,wed, fri, eat dinner, then in the library till around midnight when I go back to the dorms to hang out for an hour or so then to sleep. The weekends just replace the classes with more homework and staying out a little later. Freshman aren't allowed to have cars so I can't really go anywhere and the town is incredibly boring. I used to love taking my car out for a nice drive on the back roads when I was in HS. But even when I went home one weekend and was able to do this again, it didn't have the same effect it used to.

    I guess I could try picking up girls, but I really would prefer a more serious relationship, not just a random hookup.

    I've read up on a lot of this stuff before. I've been to that "don juan/sosuave" website which is the source of a lot of PUA material and I tried a lot of that stuff in HS but it never worked out for me. I guess I could try again. :dunno:

    I'm 5'5 and I lift Mon, Wed, Fri. Only problem is the school gym only has machines and no free weights. :squint: There are a few dumbbells, but only up to 30lbs. I just do a full body routine 3x a week. I feel a little stronger but no noticeable gains in size (and I'm trying to lose weight, not gain it so the scale doesn't help me see if it's working).

    I'm grateful for all the responses, but I seriously doubt it's just the GF issue. I'm sure that's part of it, but can that really explain my complete apathy towards life and emotionlessness? :dunno:
     
  8. Dabogy

    Dabogy New Member

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    You're not in a position to "seriously doubt" that it's a GF issue since you have never experienced it. Don't dismiss it until you've tried it. Being in a relationship fills a void that the majority feel. Like i said before, it might not clear up your issues, but should alleviate a lot.

    Back to the PUA stuff...reading and practicing are two different things. You read to learn the concepts, then you NEED to apply them. Buuut, it's not enough to just end there, you need to put your own spin on what you apply. Hardly anyone gets it right when they're starting off. You improve though by failing over and over again. Each time you make a move, you will learn what works and what does not, basically refining your game to fit your personality. For a guy who claims to be emotionless (meaning you aren't affected by rejection), you should have no problem approaching numerous women and practicing over and over again..right? :bigthumb:
     
  9. I think you just need more fun in your life. You feel like every day is just another grind. Just 24 more hours to live through. Change does not happen overnight but I think you need to find some things in life that you enjoy and also start having more communication with others throughout the day. It is hard to start talking with people you know nothing about and I don't even know how to start sometimes...but it always ends up good if you do start talking. I have already made a lot of new friends this year at school by just being friendly randomly like going to class, new classes, around the housing areas, kitchen, gym, etc.

    You are in college and the only gym they have only has machines and 30 lb DB's? That's sad.
     
  10. Musouka

    Musouka New Member

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    I guess I could try it. :dunno: There's only 2000 kids at my school so my selection is a bit more limited (and very likely to see the girl again). At least there is like 60% girls compared to guys. :naughty:
    I know, right? I think the athlete's gym has free weights, but that's only open for sports teams to use and at really odd hours. There is a YMCA about a mile or so from me and I would go there if I had a car, but it would take too much time to walk and/or run there and back with all the work I get.

    I have about 30 friends at school, that's not really a problem and I hang out/eat with them all the time.

    I think I might need to fix my sleep schedule. I have really been oversleeping(12+ hours a day with naps) and I think it's fucking with me. I remember that during HS summers I used to sleep 10+ hours and would feel kind of similar to how I'm feeling now but generally lose that feeling when I got back into a regulated schedule.
     
  11. GlassUser

    GlassUser send an email not a pm OT Supporter

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    Sounds like you need some decent friends. Got any hobbies?
     
  12. It could be working that way or you could be sleeping so much BECAUSE you feel like this. I was very depressed no more than a month ago and was going to kill myself and the days prior to this I just sat in bed ALL day because I felt no reason to get up.
     
  13. T_boy

    T_boy New Member

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    wow musuoka, I've read your comment and realized that I'm just like you, almost in every way except I don't feel so miserable about myself. And you know why? Because in my 20 years of life I understood that it takes long time for good things to happen. Believe me, I've experienced it myself. But I also know how low you can get, how miserable you can feel. Waiting for something might be very cruel for you mentally, when you feel that something is tearing you apart from the inside.
    I heard someone saying this, and it worked very well for me "after every dark night there is a bright day after that, so no matter how hard it gets stick your chest out, keep your head up and handle it"
    So keep your head up and good luck :bigthumb:
     
  14. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    Yeah you know being stuck in a rut isn't nice, but its not impossible to break free from it. Is there any chance you can attend a better and bigger college/university in another place?, maby bigger city. But most definitly a city where you would feel at home vs to feeling alienated, and especially that has a lot of outgoing facilities and activities organised that you can participate in so that your life isn't so boring anymore. If you then along with a location change and would put the will and effort in it, i really see no reason why your life couldn't get more exciting.
     
  15. Musouka

    Musouka New Member

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    Besides the amount of work, I actually really like this school. The only time there's nothing really to do is fri/sat night (there's parties, but those have gotten old and generally suck). I have a lot of friends. I think it's just that the things I might want to do take time and money, the two things I am sorely lacking in at the moment. I guess I'll just have to tough it out. :dunno:

    I did feel a little better today and actually became interested in something in one of my classes when a professor was explaining some research he had conducted with a student. I actually felt an emotion for a few minutes, but it faded away and I haven't had any since. However, at least I know I'm not completely dead emotionally. :x:

    Besides oversleeping, I also tend to overthink things a lot. I seem to grab onto certain ideas and try to apply them to everything in life. I'll get stuck in loops of thinking about my future, I feel like I have to choose my path right now and start working towards it. I feel like I have to have my personality completely set up and how I will discover new things to do, where I'll live, etc. Then I'll tend to kind of snap out of this way of thinking and have some clarity and just focus on the present and not worry so much and kind of just go day by day. Things seem perfect when I live like this. I'm just living and actually doing something instead of thinking and thinking. However, I'll suddenly get attached to another thought and the entire cycle starts over again. Is there anyway I can prevent myself from going back into this cycle? I never notice it at first and by the time I'm fully into it, I can't even think of or realize the clarity I used to have. It's like there's all these ideas and thoughts constantly racing through my head and pulling my brain in all different directions.
     
  16. acksirem

    acksirem New Member

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    Find a restaurant to work in. A cool,young restaurant, not a diner with old ladies. You'll make money, have fun, and meet women. Older women who will flirt with you constantly, wind you up, and teach you more than you've asked for about how women really think.
     
  17. DubOverdose

    DubOverdose New Member

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    Man, you're in college. College is a full experience you need to take in. You don't just become book smart, you need to loosen up and see friends on a regular basis. On your weekends, find something off campus to do. You don't have to drive, you can just wander around. Invite a girl. Halloween is coming up, carve a pumpkin. Do little things to break up your weeks so they don't all run together.
     

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