SRS The world's not enough...

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by daddyphatsacs, Apr 2, 2008.

  1. daddyphatsacs

    daddyphatsacs Serving fiends since 84

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2006
    Messages:
    56
    Likes Received:
    0
    Ok, I've been in this relationship going on for over 3 years and we've been married for 1 of those years. She has 2 kids of her own and we just recently had a kid together, which is my first. I love her with all my heart and would, and have, done anything for her and the kids. I treat them as if they were my own flesh and blood. Even better then their dads who are hardly there for them. The problem lies in, regardless of all that I do for her, she harps on the one thing that I do, but not as often as she would like and all that is is give her a massage everytime she wants it. The reason this doesn't happen as often as she would like is cause I work long hours and am tired 9 times out of 10 when I get home. I'm the only one working cause I want her to finish college and just focus on that so I watch the kids at night after I get off. She has been without a job for about a year and has been off and on about school for the past 3 years. I try and talk to her about it but she still acts like I'm the one in the wrong. It just makes me feel like no matter what I do, she'll find the one thing I don't and forget about all the good things and sacrifices I do to make things work.
     
  2. registeredPORK

    registeredPORK Happy Poo Poo

    Joined:
    Dec 10, 2006
    Messages:
    5,363
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Slaughter House

    She's being selfish. She should be the one giving you a massage when you ask for it. She's taking you for granted and what you're doing and offering to her. Probably, in other relationships, she would still have to work.

    She has it good--going to school, not working, having a loving husband to want to take care of her and her kids--even if some of them aren't his.

    I think she's unappreciative of you, and if you try to talk to her about it and she blows up at you then honestly, she's being really childish about this.

    The only thing you can really do is try to talk to her again and say it in a way she would understand.
     
  3. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2006
    Messages:
    32,592
    Likes Received:
    5
    Buy her a gift certificate for a professional massage.

    She is possibly exhausted from staying home and taking care of the kids all day (I've seen it, it's beyond hard work). However, I wanted to point out that you are the one who got yourself into this relationship. Into a relationship with a woman who according to you from the start was on and off with her interest in finishing school and now doesn't have a job. In other words....you kind of chose to marry a woman who most likely views marriage as her getting to stay home while you work all day :dunno: So I'd like to feel bad for you but I can't just yet considering she's always been the same person. In other words, you two need to talk or seek a marriage counselor if you don't find you get anywhere.
     
  4. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2002
    Messages:
    10,498
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Care,for all is like a bonsai tree
    I'll just tell you what my father told me.

    Even tho you love that woman you shouldn't let yourself be pushed around by her controllative behaviour.I've been married over 35 years and i can tell you that if there's one thing Woman are really good at and that is blaming the guy into making them feel guilty up till the point that you give in to the blackmail so that you become like a horse spanned in front of their carts, going crazy and running for their benefits. You need to be a man and stand up for yourself.

    In reality what she most likely wants is not really the massage, its more likely to be a signal that she wants to be together with you, meaning in a subtle way indicating that you are far too often absent in the relationship.

    Its highly advisable that you start 'balancing' you life. Less work , more time at home, if that's not possible tell her ' look , i work 10 hours a day just so that you can goto school ', i sacrifice so much and only get kicked by you, its not fair. I want to be together with you very much but please understand that after work im tired, i want to give a massage but i can't.
     
  5. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2006
    Messages:
    8,752
    Likes Received:
    0
    Sit down with her and talk about this. Don't get childish an do the whole "I do more than you do game", but do as Darketernal said and ask if she wants you around more.

    However, in order to make that happen, she is going to have to be willing to compromise.

    And honestly, with 3 kids, you working full time and her going to school...yeah, you're time is going to be limited.
     
  6. daddyphatsacs

    daddyphatsacs Serving fiends since 84

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2006
    Messages:
    56
    Likes Received:
    0
    Thanks for the advice guys. I'll try and sit her down tonight when she gets home from school.
     

Share This Page