The wife doesn't care for sex anymore...Help?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Sneaky Ranger, Jul 25, 2008.

  1. Sneaky Ranger

    Sneaky Ranger Didn't know bout dem der Jedi Squirrels did ya

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    Its hard for me to understand why we have this problem. We are both attractive people and love the other very much. Its not that its bad. When she does want it she enjoys.

    But those times are very few and far between. She will let me on a regular basis but its just for me, and to be honest I dont really enjoy it, although its slightly better than doing the work myself.

    I love her very much and I am try to make it not be a deal but its becoming a problem. Ladies, especially married ones like my wife, advice or help would be appreciated.
     
    Last edited: Jul 25, 2008
  2. Sneaky Ranger

    Sneaky Ranger Didn't know bout dem der Jedi Squirrels did ya

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    The problem did start after our first kid and is almost 4 now. I have noticed the cycles but its the going months without her wanting it that sucks.

    I have a very high sex drive so this creates a problem.

    26 years
    Recent promotion
    2 kids

    Yeah I have heard the kids are a killer and around 30 it will get better. I continue to feel I have the problem because I can't accept the way it is... Is it selfish that I feel I should be, for a lack of better words... be taken care of better. I go out of my way to make sure she is happy in other aspects of her life.
     
  3. Sneaky Ranger

    Sneaky Ranger Didn't know bout dem der Jedi Squirrels did ya

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    No birth control... We dont want anymore and thats been taken care of.

    I do my share, although I admit she does more. I change diapers, do dishes, I make dinner more often than not, I hate laudry but I do some. I dont get asked to to laundry and I dont ask for help with yard work.

    My biggest fear is she may not be interested in me, not just the sex. But it also doesn't seem like that at all. I'm just not having a good time dealing with this.....
     
  4. le_rocks

    le_rocks New Member

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    Man, that just adds to the myth that the sex goes to zero when you put that ring on their finger.
     
  5. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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  6. Sneaky Ranger

    Sneaky Ranger Didn't know bout dem der Jedi Squirrels did ya

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  7. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Of course you have a right to be disappointed! You are unsatisfied for the most part in your sex life with the woman you love. I'm not blaming her necessarily, but you need to speak with her about this and how you feel.

    My bf and I read an article about a month ago (about to make a thread on it soon) about this couple who tried to have sex every day for a month. They had noticed after 5 years together their sex life slowed. So they had sex every day for 30 days and by the end of it they said they had had the most amazing, most spontaneous, most fun sex of their entire relationship. It forced them to try all kinds of new things and switch things up. They also said after that month they were more affectionate towards each other than they had been in years without even realizing it. Said it was the best thing they ever did for their relationship.

    Obvously this might sound extreme to you but my point being you do need to both speak about how you are feeling about your sex lives, what you like and want. You've been married for a few years, you should be able to be open with one another.
     
  8. Sirius

    Sirius OT Supporter

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  9. ahtnamas

    ahtnamas OT Supporter

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    My SO hardly ever wants to have sex with me. He's a boy. I'm the lady.

    I feel like he only does it because he feels obligated :hs:

    I want to every day, he wants to like..... once every two weeks

    And we're not even married.

    We've never even done it more than once a day because he says he 'can't'... Is this true, males? You can only get off once every 24 hours? Because I hear about guys jerking off before sex to last longer... but my boy says he can only do it at most once a day. We agreed on every other day but it always ends up at once a week.

    :hs:
     
  10. beanolo

    beanolo It does a body good!!!1

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    Has to recover? LOL. Umm I think this is the same for most guys.. but I would just need about 15 minutes to "recover" and go at it again.
     
  11. ShoverBot

    ShoverBot OT Supporter

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    Depending on age, but its still complete BS. Im mid 20s and have goten off upwards of 6-7 times between a couple rounds of sex in a 4-5hr span. Beanolo is on the ball tho, 5-15mins usualy between getting off and getting hard again. The older you get the longer that gets tho.
     
  12. arsbu

    arsbu New Member

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    I can have sex and ejaculate multiple times a day if it's spread out. But if you want me to do it immediately after we just did it, I can get it up within 5-10 minutes, but I probably won't be able to get off for a long time.
     
  13. oldmustang

    oldmustang New Member

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    I'm in the exact same boat. I don't think it is really the way your wife feels about you that is the problem, but the situation. After my wife and I had our second child, sex for my wife has gone way down on her priority list....sucks. One way to spice it up is to get a sitter and go out on a date, flowers and the whole bit. If you can arrange for an over night sitter and get a hotel room you just might get your sexy wife back. Tons of work, but it works.
     
  14. Leah

    Leah OT Supporter

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    I'm with ya. :sadwavey:

    I get pissed though. I think it's complete bullshit that I'm throwing myself at him and he seems only mildly interested. I'm definitely the "giver" in our relationship, he gets oral and back scratches galore and I'm always ready for whatever.

    :wtc:

    Lets start a support group.
     
  15. Mugen92GS-R

    Mugen92GS-R New Member

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    :hsugh:

    15 minutes and I can get hard again, but I won't cum.

    Probably at LEAST 45 minutes, more like an hour and a half until I could orgasm again.
     
  16. 1stgenrocks

    1stgenrocks New Member

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    we need more chicks like you lol. amazing body and you want more sex then your getting... :bowdown:
     
  17. Ideotique

    Ideotique Drinking on monday nights does not make me an alco

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    Same here. fwb wants it up to 4 times a night and it's a struggle.
     

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