The ten commandments of being good with women

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Socrates, Feb 16, 2006.

  1. Socrates

    Socrates New Member

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    This came from a man on the Don Juan forums. It's pure gold and all should take heed. :)




    [FONT=verdana, arial, helvetica]THE TEN COMMANDMENTS
    What you are about to read may seem like common sense. But for me, truly understanding and BELIEVING this was nothing short of a personal epiphany!

    1. THOU SHALL NOT WORSHIP GOOD LOOKS.
    Time to wake up from your drooling slumber, folks. Beautiful women are nothing special, just lucky. The truth is that a lot of pretty people let their looks do all the work for them in life and beneath those great genes they are actually spoiled, under-developed children. Dont let good genetics impress you, instead make that chick WORK for your stamp of approval! You must rewire your mental circuitry so that instead of trying to impress her, you approach to see if she meets YOUR expectations.

    Your whole attitude should be that she has passed your visual test, but you are not quite convinced she is the goods yet. Say “hi”, ask her opinion, comment on the environment or even command her to “Stop!” and talk to you. It honestly does not matter how you open, as long as you approach from a position of power.

    Frame it so that you are not entering her world, she is entering yours! Once she steps inside, be sure to treat her with the same irreverence you treat your friends so that she can enjoy the refreshing change of being HERSELF around you, instead of what you imagine her to be.

    WTF? Why are you still drooling? Gotta reverse this mindset! Imagine that YOU are the gorgeous model and picture her as the smelly, 300-pound heffer who wants to get in your pants!

    2. THOU SHALL BECOME WORTHY.
    You can’t pretend to be the prize, you gotta be able to look in the mirror and honestly say “I LOVE this guy!”. However, this does not mean you should have a large ego. In fact your ego is one of your biggest obstacles and you would do well to rid yourself of false pride. What I am saying is..why pretend to be a great person when you can actually BE one? Work hard to excel in all areas of life. (health, wealth, relationships) Make your dreams happen and most importantly, realize that happiness is a choice!

    By the same token, don’t let self-improvement be an excuse not to handle your biz. It can be very easy to make excuses like “Let me get a good car first” or “let me lose/gain 10 pounds, THEN I will try this!” Don’t fall into this trap, cuz you will just keep procrastinating, looking for reasons not to get your game on.

    As you read this post, scores of beautiful women are banging ugly losers who have no future. Why? Simply because these fellas didnt let their shortness/fatness/brokeness/etc keep them from going after what they wanted!

    Improve on what you can (health, fitness, style) and embrace the things you cannot change (height, race, etc) Insecurity is an ugly thing, so confront the roots of your warped self image and banish this negativity from your mind. No excuses, dude! Only you can make yourself worthy of the best things in life!

    3. THOU SHALL ACCEPT THE SEXUAL NATURE OF WOMAN
    Face it buddy. Girls are horny. VERY, VERY horny! It may come as a surprise to some of you, but even the shyest girl will think sexual thoughts within seconds of seeing you!

    For example, my ex-girl was one of the most modest, quietest chicks I ever met. We were talking about first impressions one day and I told her the truth...I thought she had a nice ass! She countered by confessing to me that within minutes of our meeting, she imagined me grabbing her by the hair, pulling her down to her knees and forcing her to give me a *******! Needless to say, I was shocked!

    Don’t let society fool you. Between the G-Spot, clitoris and the multiple orgasms, women are capable of sexual pleasure we can only dream of. The fact that they supress these desires only makes them hornier beneath the surface! What they need is someone who can set them free from the judgemental eye of society. A natural man who can break through their fears of being labeled a slut and liberate the wild, natural woman within!

    4. THOU SHALL ACCEPT THY SEXUAL NATURE
    So how do you become this natural man? Well for starters, you have to be totally comfortable with your own masculine desires. There must be absolutely no shame to your game!

    A common misconception is that women are put off by horny guys. This is a totally false bullshít lie! Delete this horrible social programming from your mind and install the update..Women are turned off by NEEDY guys who are insecure and compensate for it by acting sexually confident. Big difference!

    Hammer it into your head that there is absolutely nothing wrong with being horny - sex is nature’s precious gift to all of existence! Think back to all the negative influences that have made you believe that sex is wrong/dirty and damn them all to hell. None of us would be here if it wasnt for this “filthy act” and nothing will keep you from your goal more than your own shame and discomfort.

    Half of this battle is simply killing your hangups because she wont be able to accept your sexual side if you can’t do so yourself!

    Note: Accepting your own sexuality does not mean you should jerk off more. Quite the contrary, too much of the old knuckle shuffle is not helpful at all. It kills your drive and also gets you far too accustomed to your own rhythm. A big part of this game is being a good lover and that requires you to tune into HER rhythm as well as your own. I know guys who have major problems keeping girls interested because all they do is masturbate using a female’s body!

    This is not to say that you should never wack off either... everyone is different. Just pay attention to your body. If you don’t have a boner every morning, or get occasional wood throughout the day then you should really cut back. If that doesn’t help, then your testosterone levels are set to “Sissy”, which means you are probably in bad physical shape and need to get off your ass! Exercise, eat well and get plenty of rest. Inactivity is your libido’s worst enemy, so be sure to balance out those long TV/computer/playstation hours with at least an hour’s worth of sweaty activity a day.

    5. THOU SHALL VIBE
    Social intelligence is the foundation of your game. You dont have to become a party animal or trendy hipster, but in general you should learn to communicate and vibe with people. The problem is that many of us are trapped in our own heads due to extended periods of isolation. We work and study alone, get worn out and go home to plug into the television or internet...alone...again! We have to make a conscious effort to be social.

    Chilling should be a major priority in your life. Hang out more often with friends. Find places that pique your interest where you can let loose and have a great time. Bars, restaurants, stores, cafes, streets, classes, gyms, clubs, etc are all excellent places to mingle. Learn to make friends of strangers and keep expanding your social circle till you are totally at ease in the company of others. Without some degree of social skills, you are pretty much useless!

    There was a time that I suffered from social phobia, then I realized some of the mistakes I was making that kept me from vibing properly.

    - Talking/moving too fast.
    - Not maintaining eye contact.
    - Not talking at all, lost in my own thoughts and spacing out.
    - Nervous fidgeting, closed body language.
    - Censoring my words, being insincere.
    - Getting offended when people poked fun at me.
    - Worrying about the impression I was making.
    - Over-selling myself, trying to be “cool”

    All of these things conveyed personal anxiety and neediness. Is it any wonder I could not make any friends? Nobody likes a desperate try-hard, so take another look at the above list and do the complete opposite. Do yourself a favor and RELAX because the world is your living room! You don’t have to be a clown or entertainer, but people will enjoy your company when you can make FUN of anything!

    The cool part is that once you get a feel for this vibe, you will discover that you really don’t need to rely on patterns or routines and will invent new material on the fly. If your vibe is right, then your game will be tight!
    [/FONT]

    [FONT=verdana, arial, helvetica]6. THOU SHALL FLIRT.
    Let your eye contact and physical touch show her that you are a sexual being. But don’t stop there, keep upping the ante and don’t worry about being offensive. Be persistent and quite often you will be surprised to see just how much she will let you get away with!

    Be playful. Tickle her. Spin her around. Make fun of her quirks of character or style of dress. Accuse her of seducing you. Give her conflicting messages by telling her she is cute as you withdraw, and that she is not your type as you feel her up. Treat her like a spoiled child who desperately needs a good spanking!

    Sometimes you can escalate like this all the way to the bedroom. But more often than not, you will notice that when you cross this line with certain girls, they will feel one of three things

    - Creeped out because your actions seem forced and out of character
    - Validated by your attention and feel like they already “have you”.
    - The need to be more of a challenge so they don’t come off as being too easy.

    In either case, you will notice them losing interest, playing hard-to-get, or flat out ignoring you. A great way to get them chasing you again is to qualify them. This is when you set up obstacles so that they have to jump through your hoops to get on your good side again. For example:

    YOU: You are kinda hot...but you could never be my girlfriend.
    HER: What? Why do you say that???
    YOU: I only date nice girls and you have trouble written all over you.
    HER: No I am nice! Really!
    YOU: Right...sure.
    HER: (Trying to convince you she is nice)

    The above is just an example, instead of “nice” insert whatever quality you are looking for. You can even say the complete opposite, that she is too nice for you and what you really need is a bad girl! It doesn’t matter as long as you are giving her something to strive for. Set your standards and let her try to make the grade so she has to actually work for your affection. Once she jumps through your hoop, be sure to reward her with hugs/kisses/ass-grabbing and keep escalating!

    This type of approach works exceptionally well for those crazy party girls who are just looking to have a good time. However, if you are looking for something deeper than a one-night stand, then you need to put some more effort in...

    [/FONT][FONT=verdana, arial, helvetica]7. THOU SHALL CONNECT
    A more virtuous woman has to feel a connection in order to share her body with you. On a certain level she has to know how REAL you are before she will part those thighs! This is why you need to pry her soul open and see what she is made of. Once you do this, you will be able to reach her on an emotional level.

    HINT: you won’t get there by asking her where she works, how old she is, etc.. This will only reinforce her image of you as a stranger in her world. What you really want to do is instill a feeling of FAMILIARITY!

    Once you have a little rapport going, ask her things that you honestly would like to know......the craziest thing she ever did...her most embarrassing moment...the last time she was totally in love, how it happened.... sexiest body parts, etc. Trade dirty little secrets & fantasies, compare scars, and swap war stories. Stimulate her FEELINGS! Your objective is to take her on an emotional mission that disengages her logical mind by giving her a taste of laughter, sadness, lust, anger, joy, etc.

    It’s also great to establish expectations on both sides. Find out what she is looking for in a lover, then look at your life to see which of these qualities you possess. Try not to qualify yourself to her using adjectives to describe yourself (I am smart, funny, sensitive, etc), instead use stories and anecdotes of your life to convey these values indirectly. This way she can reach her own conclusions about you, instead of being spoon-fed your own perceptions.

    The best part is that this works both ways...tell her precisely what you look for in a woman and watch her do the exact same thing!

    You connect with her like this for various reasons. To name a few:

    1. It makes her see that you are not JUST after the sex and actually value personality.
    2. You touch on parts of her life that some of her closest friends don’t know about.
    3. You engage her emotions so that later on she can rationalize the two of you hooking up.
    4. You are actually screening her the whole time to see if she is cool enough for you!

    The above suggestions are merely an idea of subjects to talk about. Don’t force them or ask them too soon. If you are pressing her for her life story before she shows genuine interest, then you will only push her away! Always maintain a relaxed and laidback vibe, as if you are merely humoring her and not really into the conversation. Reward her with more attention/affection when she says/does something cool.

    Whatever the case, don’t fall into the trap of being too eager to talk about yourself. Let her fill in the blanks sometimes. For example, during your conversations you will inevitably get interrupted by someone else, or some other distraction in your environment. When the distraction goes away, don’t be so eager to continue where you left off, instead go off on tangents and leave the previous topics hanging in the balance. All of these unresolved plots help keep her hooked into your world and sparks her curiosity even further. Congratulations, you have become a mystery and she will now be compelled to unravel you!

    But don’t bust out the party hats just yet, buddy. At some point you are gonna have to bite the bullet and man up, or you will be taking the express train to Friendsville!

    8. THOU SHALL DOMINATE.
    The sexiest thing you can do for a woman is LEAD her.

    From the moment they set eyes you, chicks can tell if you are dominant or submissive to them.

    Dominant = Masculine = Potential Lover.
    Submissive = Feminine = Uhh...Let’s just be friends!

    In other words, establish your role from the get-go. Don’t be afraid to lock eyes with her, because the instant you look away, she will see that you are intimidated by her and this is not attractive. Girls are supposed to be intimidated by us, not vice-versa!

    So let’s say you do the approach and game her enough to get the number. Before you decide to call, have a master plan in place because for a woman, it is a huge turn off when you say shít like “I dunnooooooo...what do you want to do?”

    It’s also not attractive when you look for her approval with questions. She ain’t your momma, so don’t go looking for permission! There is a world of difference between ASKING her “Will you go out with me?” and TELLING her “You seem pretty cool. Let’s hang out sometime...” Let her know exactly what is gonna happen and how much fun it will be, or better yet, just take her hand and MAKE it happen right then and there!

    As the man in this mating game, it’s your job to call the shots. You decide where the conversation goes. You decide when/where to meet. You decide when its time to switch venues. You set the frame of the interaction. Keep in mind that chicks get off on submission, it is their nature to be penetrated physically, emotionally and spiritually. They honestly can’t help getting extremely turned on when they relinquish their control to a man who HANDLES them.

    Thing is, even after they have decided they want you, they STILL wont make that first move. They are simply waiting for you to show dominance and simply TAKE what you want!

    9. THOU SHALL ISOLATE AND CLOSE
    Social programming is a powerful thing. No matter how much a woman may be feeling you, her fear of looking like a slut is often far greater than her desire to hook up. This is why your goal is to remove her from the prying eyes of society so you can both get lost in the sweet chemistry of animal lust!

    Take her by the hand and lead her to another place so she gets the feeling of you two being “together”. The more places you lead her to, the more time will distort so it seems like you have known each other longer. If you can’t get her to leave the venue, then take her to a more intimate spot where less people will notice you, then draw her into a comfy, private niche in your world.

    Once you are in a relaxed state together and totally vibing, its time to forget all the seduction techniques you ever read and put yourself on “autopilot”. Allow your consciousness to wander from your head, into your body so you can really enjoy the sight of her eyes wondering “who is this perfect stranger?”, the smell of her neck, emitting a plethora of pheremones as you excite her more and more, the feel of her warm, silky skin, etc....you get the picture.

    While you’re at it, imagine all the naughty things you want to do to her. Let her see your eyes and feel your touch as you are thinking these things! You shouldnt have to tell her that she looks delicious enough to eat with whipped cream. The way you look, talk and carry yourself should let her know the deal. Pure, unadulterated SEX should be the force that sweeps the two of you along the interaction.

    Now pay attention, cuz this next bit is VERY important. As you progress, you must learn to recognize the windows of opportunity. These are the magical moments when you simply MUST make your move or she will give up on you, thinking you are either gay or just not interested! I can’t tell you when these moments will happen, you will have to develop and rely on your gut instincts.

    For instance, let’s say you have reached a point where you finally got her alone. you are physically close to each other and the atmosphere has become more intimate. There is a brief pause of silence as you simply enjoy each other’s presence. She looks, feels and smells AMAZING and despite your calm facade, you can hear a small voice in your head screaming “KISS HER, YOU FOOL!” This is when its time to face facts, God has already blessed you with the best seduction tools to close the deal, they are called BALLS... use them and take that chance!

    10. THOU SHALL BE REAL
    None of us is perfect, so don’t try to act like you are the SupremeAlphaMaleOfTheUniverse. Women come equipped with state-of-the-art BS detectors and can smell posers a mile away. Don’t get so absorbed with not being “AFC” that you set off their “Poser Alert” and blow your chances. Give a compliment or show some vulnerability for chrissakes!

    Being an uber-Don Juan at all times is just as sad and ingenuine as being an average frustrated chump! Once she has passed your screening and you feel a connection, start to open up a little. Let her see that there is more to you than meets the eye.

    Women LOVE to discover the vulnerable chinks in your armor, especially after you have established yourself as a confident, dominant fella. It triggers their maternal instincts to care for the wounded child that no one else can see. It also gives dimension to your character and blesses them with the rare gift of AUTHENTICITY.

    Ya see, sincerity is so hard to come by these days that when it does, it is a breath of fresh air. Society has us all wearing masks and playing roles so often that we forget who we really are. As a seducer, it is your job to get people to discard those masks, lose their inhibitions and feel more like themselves than they have in ages. It is not as easy as it sounds because most folks are followers. Once again, it’s up to you to set the frame by being, you guessed it, genuine and uninhibited!
    [/FONT]
     
  2. dark cloud

    dark cloud New Member

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    I just skimmed over it, but I definitely agree with what I read.
     
  3. cutlasskid85

    cutlasskid85 OT Supporter

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    Good read

    Thanks
     
  4. Tiberium

    Tiberium Active Member

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    :bowdown: copy--> paste
     
  5. Vailripper

    Vailripper Daywalkers have feelings too.

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    Some good points, nice read~
     
  6. Sionell89

    Sionell89 I grew up when I wasn't looking

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  7. ebbnflo

    ebbnflo REAL- LAOT Hermit

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    There is actually not a lot I can disagree with in there.
    There's some stuff, but not a lot.
     
  8. skelm

    skelm New Member

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    Sticky?
     
  9. Socrates

    Socrates New Member

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    Definitely should be headed to the archives.
     
  10. gigaboy

    gigaboy New Member

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    Bravo, well written! Now if only I could remember all that. :)
     
  11. Nouia

    Nouia New Member

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    No. Okay? No.
    That was fucking stupid. :o Sorry.
     
  12. jonno

    jonno New Member

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    i like it
     
  13. Solus Emsu

    Solus Emsu ****** U N R A T E D ! ****** -----THAT'S HOW I RO

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    Some important points in there. Probably the most important points.

    Two Thumbs Up!!!! :bigthumb: :bigthumb:
     
  14. x6ftundx

    x6ftundx New Member

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    good job... I can agree with a lot of it... the best is locking the eyes... that will get them every time
     
  15. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Damn good advice. Should be sticky.
     
  16. MrInconsistant

    MrInconsistant New Member

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    bookmarked

    oh, and i'm just being anal, but it's 'shalt'
     
  17. Elusion

    Elusion New Member

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    read it. thought it was good.
     
  18. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Fascinating stuff. Can I get some female responses to this bit right here:

    As the man in this mating game, it’s your job to call the shots. You decide where the conversation goes. You decide when/where to meet. You decide when its time to switch venues. You set the frame of the interaction. Keep in mind that chicks get off on submission, it is their nature to be penetrated physically, emotionally and spiritually. They honestly can’t help getting extremely turned on when they relinquish their control to a man who HANDLES them.
     
  19. cutlasskid85

    cutlasskid85 OT Supporter

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    I'll like OG Ron C's stuff :nuts:
     
  20. red97gst

    red97gst New Member

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    i think there only a very small handful of women who are exception to this rule. but you'd be able to figure this out within 10 seconds of talking to them.

    otherwise , many women may deny that they like being "handled," but is the sad truth.

    This doesnt just apply to meeting the woman, but also when you are her boyfriend. I've never had a GF who was into the "well whatever you wanna do" type of attitude. They'd rather you present them with THE PLAN, and then if they dont like it, they'll just have you come up with an alternative.

    They want to CHOOSE, not create the activity...

    Anyway great post. Not just for wannabe pick up artists, but for any straight guy
     
  21. Digital_angel

    Digital_angel New Member

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    .
     
  22. Das_Ubermensch

    Das_Ubermensch OT Supporter

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    Its true. The logic is hard to grasp for a lot of guys because of what you said - women deny it and because we dont tend to be the type who like to be submissive. Personally I cannot fathom how anyone would be content to let another person call the shots. Just not the best way to get exactly what you want IMO. The best thing for a man to do is stop caring to some extent. I figure if a woman wants to let me decide how it goes, thats a surefire way to lead me to happiness, and while it might not feel good to do all of the leading and in a way place their needs and wants second to mine, if such a situation is acceptable to them, so be it.
     

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