The NEW "every band ever sucks" thread

Discussion in 'Entertainment' started by unsightly, Sep 26, 2004.

  1. unsightly

    unsightly New Member

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    D00d00 had a good idea with his thread, here's the next level people:

    I'm gonna name a band, you reply with how it sucks (if you can) and name another band. Next person replies to you with why yours sucks. Let's get some quality elitist complaining here!
    No overobscurity for the sake of sounding cool, please.

    BAND NUMBER ONE:
    Korn (come on I need an easy one to get it started)
     
  2. fusion210

    fusion210 New Member

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    Korn doesn't suck.
     
  3. unsightly

    unsightly New Member

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    what's that got to do with this thread? point is to figure out a way to complain about every band you can think of, even if you like them. I think korn's an easy target, come on now
     
  4. JPIZZLE

    JPIZZLE New Member

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    korn sucks they lack talent
     
  5. imsobored

    imsobored New Member

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    The Offspring
     
  6. 1979TA

    1979TA OT Supporter

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    They lost all credibility with Pretty Fly For A White Guy

    Bela Fleck and the Flecktones
     
  7. thenorthwest

    thenorthwest New Member

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    Their older stuff was better.
     
  8. unsightly

    unsightly New Member

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    Plus they're NPR music, ask any 50-year-old about them.

    311
     
  9. 123321123321

    123321123321 New Member

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    come original? the music video? thats the definition of a good band sucking.

    catch-22
     
  10. d00d00

    d00d00 In cold blood

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    White boy reggae once again. Terrible covers of what were once great songs. Took the punk movement and completely queered it up. I believe The Clash and a handful of other bands are wholely responsible for the destruction of the punk movement. Need I remind you about Big Audio Dynamite?

    Siouxsie and TheBanshees
     
  11. unsightly

    unsightly New Member

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    If the singer's Ethel Merman-esque warblings don't turn you off, their total lack of songwriting should. And if all that gets past you, their overblown 8 minute pretentioso epics won't... you'll be too busy slipping into a coma. Echoey female vocals can't quite drown out the shitty instrumentals and they sure can't save a talentless band. They should have broken up in 1988 like everybody else who made this kind of music.

    Oh, and since nobody handled Korn properly, I'll have a crack at it. Congratulations to Korn for bringing what is possibly the worst genre trend in popular music ever, nu-metal. They combined singing like your testes are being operated on with the powerchord-filled dreck of metal and added some gutteral electrick shock tortured kitten noises for good measure. And dreadlocks on a white man should be punishable by flogging.

    Incubus anyone?
     
    Last edited: Sep 27, 2004
  12. d00d00

    d00d00 In cold blood

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    I am fucking impressed. 4 THUMBS UP.
     
  13. unsightly

    unsightly New Member

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    I wanna see someone tackle incubus, are you up for it? I don't think I could do it without turning it into a thousand-page life pursuit
     
  14. d00d00

    d00d00 In cold blood

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    To be honest I've heard one or two songs and avoided them like the plague since then.
     
  15. unsightly

    unsightly New Member

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    Fuck it, I'll do it. The problem with Incubus is their actual skill at playing the instruments. It's almost tragic; it WOULD be tragic if they didn't play such shit. I remind you, though, that their singer looks like this:
    [​IMG]
    Priceless. Also, that god damn acoustic version of "Pardon Me" is an insult to the whole of human history (including proto-lifeforms like self-replicating enzymes). And they criminally waste what could be cool if it would stop hanging around alternashits like Incubus: a turntable. Plus I believe one of the white guys had dreadlocks at some point.

    time to pull out the big guns...

    R.E.M.
     
  16. Zero

    Zero Well-Known Member

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    Fuck you! rAERRKLREKLEKGKLER
    Michael Stipe = big bag of shit with the ability to create a sound with his voice that would have made ghandi go on a murderous rampage.

    stone temple pilots
     
  17. wait was korn the band that had that video about not making music videos that were like all the other ones and tried to be all cool by being rebellious when in fact they were just being douchebags? hmm yeh korn does suck
     
  18. Thrice - im curious as to what people hate about them. i personally think theyre great
     
  19. unsightly

    unsightly New Member

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    it's a no go in this thread till you complain about stone temple pilots, read the first post
     
  20. 1979TA

    1979TA OT Supporter

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    They suck when Weiland wasn't on drugs (so they have like 2 bad songs :rofl: )
    But seriously, every band has their own sounds, but too many of STP's songs sound the same

    Afghan Whigs
     
  21. Phrogg

    Phrogg Guest

    They have the name afghan in their band name

    311
     
  22. d00d00

    d00d00 In cold blood

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    #1 - try a little fucking harder than that
    #2 - 311 has been covered already
     
  23. d00d00

    d00d00 In cold blood

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    Have you noticed Stipe has only ever written one vocal melody? He's been using slight variations on it since Green. You wanna talk about Ethel Murmun? Stipe is your guy. I don't trust the guy. This faux-activist always seems to have a huge issue with something but never seems to do anything about it, and lord knows, after being every 30-something's favorite singer for 20 years, he can afford to by now.
     
  24. unsightly

    unsightly New Member

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    I just listened to samples from every album on iTunes for the Afghan Whigs, and it's safe to say I'll never hear them again. Their instrumentals and melodies are just mediocre to keep them out of big hit land, while their crappy singing (he must have been taking "echo effect will save your lack of singing talent" lessons from Siouxie and the Banshees) and absolutely bland style makes them unappealing to elitist scenesters as well. So no matter who I hang out with I'm safe from anyone ever mistreating my ears like that again! Thank you, Afghan Whigs!

    U2....oh yes
     
  25. hopeudiemahc

    hopeudiemahc "stay true to yourself and follow your heart. Giv

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    95% of all music sux so get over it
     

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