SRS The last 1 year of my life has been complete shit

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by familyguy101, Jul 30, 2009.

  1. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    Seriously, it's just one mountain of shit after another after another after another.

    May, 2008- A retard stupid friend of mine convinced me that we should go down to a casino and use fake ID's to get in so we can drink and gamble. I was such a lost kid at this point that I couldn't tell a bad idea from a good idea so I did it. Well, we got caught by security and I got arrested and charged with a Class A misdemeanor. My retard friend ran away so he never got charged. I found a lawyer and he wanted $1200 to help me with this. He got it knocked down to 50 hours of community service, probation, and the charges would get dropped. No big deal I thought. My girlfriend thought that I was a badass.

    June, 2008- After quitting my 5th shitty job I realized that I either need an eduaction/training or I needed to start a business. Since I was still living at home, I figured now would be a great time to take the risk. I had over $7,000 saved up, and my dad finally found a good paying job again. He was making about $800/week and working around 60-65 hours. He is 61 years old. My girlfriend was impressed and totally supported my idea.

    July, 2008- After lots of research, I decided that starting up a website selling car audio equipment was what I was going to do. The problem? I didn't know shit about starting a business or making websites or anything. So I decided to pay a coaching company to teach me how everything should be done. The cost of this program was $3600. Also, aside from my business venture, some stupid ass "friends" and I decided to get drunk and steal some golf carts and destroy shit. We though we would never get caught. One of these friends was the same idiot that convinced me to go to the casino.

    October, 2008- FINALLY! My website was setup and running. I worked FURIOUSLY over the last 2 months to get everything going. I burned through my entire $7,000, plus I had to sell A LOT of my shit to support myself while I was doing this. At this point I am completely BROKE! My relationship with my girlfriend suffered pretty bad since I was always working on the business. I got her all hyped up that once this business started rolling then I would have money and things would be cool again. I started doing my community service hours from my Class A misdemeanor.

    November, 2008- Business went nowhere. In fact, some asshole scammed me for over $800 because he used a stolen credit card. I lost the money AND the equipment. I didn't have enough money in my bank account to cover this so I had to borrow money from my mother. I felt like a failure. Overall my net profit for this month was -$200. Also, a detective showed up at my house and questioned me about the golf cart incident. He told me that 2 of my friends ratted us all out already and that he wouldn't charge me with a crime if I testified along with them against the 4th member of our group. I told him I don't know what he is talking about and he left. Those idiot friends that ratted us all out stopped answering my phone calls and I have yet to hear from them. Eventually I found out that they indeed ratted us all out.

    December, 2008- Business was pretty good because of Christmas season. I made about $1000 this month. This is the last time I would see this kind of profit to this day. I was still broke since I had to pay my mother back. My relationship with my girl was suffering more. I began to feel very frustrated. I got yet another job working as a car salesman at an Acura dealership. I promised my girl that I would be good at selling cars and we would move into an apartment within the next 3 months.

    January, 2009- I got a call from the 4th friend saying he just got picked up on a warrant for the golf cart incident. He said I have a warrant out for my arrest as well. I checked and indeed I had a warrant. I got a lawyer and turned myself in. I was completely broke and the lawyer wanted $3500 to represent me. Once again I had to borrow money from my mother. Business was shitty, I still haven't sold a SINGLE car, and community service hours needed to be done. I was so fucking busy and stressed at this point that I rarely had time to see my girl. This made me sad and just added to the stress. At this point I had absolutely no idea where my life would end up. I hated my shitty job, my business was shit, I had no education, no job prospects, and basically no future.

    Febuary, 2009- I was so broke that I sold my car for $2100 and bought a piece of shit car for $800 so now I had an extra $1200 that I could use to pay my mom back. I still hadn't sold a car which meant that you just get a check for minimum wage for the hours you work. I was making $260/week working 45 hours and doing community service on my time off. Business was ok, I made about $400 but it all went to my lawyer. Basically at this point any money I had would go straight into paying my lawyer off. I still had no time for my girl and things began to fall apart between us. I felt like a failure because I didn't sell a single fucking car yet, my business wasn't doing nearly as good as I though it would, and I made empty promises to my girl. My father also got really really sick this month and stopped going into work. The poor guy got a serious skin rash and he was up all night coughing, sweating, and he felt like complete shit the last half of the month.

    March, 2009- I finally got fired from the dealership due to my bad performance. I was still broke and driving my $800 beater which started leaking from the sunroof. I went to court and realized just how fucked I am with these felony charges. I was looking at $30,000 in damage that I might have to pay back along with a felony conviction. My father finally went to the hospital and was diagnosed with cancer. He was in such bad shape that my family and I could barely look at him. My mother started pissing me off so I said a few words about her and my older sister jumped on me and beat the shit out of me. I finally finished my community service hours and my lawyer was almost paid off. At this point I was in such bad shape my my girlfriend and I hadn't gone out and had fun in over 3 months. We just sat around and didn't do shit because we were both broke and I was so fucking stressed that I wasn't even fun to be around anymore. She started giving me the silent treatment. I went from having good money saved up and 2 cars, to being broke, in debt, driving a really shitty beater, and in such deep shit with the law that I felt completely hopeless.

    April, 2009- Girlfriend broke up with me and started dating someone new within a week. My dad was out of work, depressed, and giving up on life since the doctors didn't give him much longer to live. I had credit card debt and had to start helping out around the house with the bills because my dad wasn't going to. I couldn't find work so I filed for unemployment and lucking they gave it to me. I was getting $221/week. My business did ok, I profited close to $400 but once again it all went to bills/lawyer/credit card. I went back to court for my Class A misdemeanor and found that I violated the probation since I got charged with the felonies so the charges for using the fake ID were re-instated. My lawyer for this case told me that he was too busy to help me. So I did all that community service for absolutely nothing. I wanted to die.

    May, 2009- Not much happened. I just lived off of unemployment and went to court 2 times a month. I wept almost every night because I missed her so much. Dad was still sick and depressed and my poor mom was working every day to make ends meet. Business was shitty. Life still sucked. I was so stressed and had so much on my mind and on top of it I couldn't figure out what I was going to do with the rest of my life. Nothing interested me at all. I was pretty sure i'd be miserable for the rest of my life. I finally got rid of the $800 piece of shit car and upgraded to a $1700 nicer piece of shit. I had to borrow money from my grandmother to pay for the difference in cost.

    June, 2009- I had about $1,000 saved up again so I decided to put it to good use. I decided that for someone like me, the best job I could have and enjoy would be to become a firefighter. I enrolled in an EMT-B course at a local community college. I made just enough money to pay credit cards off and pay for gas to drive to classes. Business picked up this month, made about $400 again so i used it to pay my grandma back.

    July, 2009- I guess this has been the best month yet. I finished the EMT-B class with a 91%, I finally paid ALL OF MY FUCKING DEBT OFF, and my business did pretty well, about $600. My dad's depressed went away and he will fight the cancer as best he can so he can try to live. I got a call from my lawyer today representing me for my felony cases. He told me he struck me a deal where the felony would get reduced to a misdemeanor and I would get smacked with about $14,000 in restitution that I would have to pay back for the damage that we caused. So my options are to either fight the felony in trial or accept the misdemeanor and pay a shitload of money back.....great, MORE FUCKING DEBT! I'm stressed beyond my wits end. I don't know how to handle it anymore. I tried coming to these forums for help but all I was told was to go see a therapist. Right, and where the fuck will the money come from for that?

    August, 2009- Who the fuck knows? I will decide if I will take my felony case to trial or if I will accept the misdemeanor and the big ass fine. I am going to my sentencing date for my ID fraud misdemeanor later this month and who the fuck knows what the judge will give me for that since I don't have a lawyer for it anymore. I probably won't be able to get hired on a fire department with 2 misdemeanors so maybe that one fucking career choice that would of made me happy will probably go out the window. After all this shit I still miss my girlfriend, I'm still broke, my dad is still dying, my poor mother is working her ass off, I have no friends, and I still live at home and probably will for a long long time if I have to pay that $14,000 back.

    What the fuck do I have to look forward to? I made some bad choices with friends and now look how bad I am fucked. Sometimes I check facebook and see how much fun other people look like they are having and I wonder how nice it must be to live life like that. Meanwhile I just sit here rotting away and not looking forward to anything that is going to happen any time soon...and i'm lonely on top of it. I don't go anywhere, I don't do anything. I don't spend any money unless i absolutely have to. I havn't gotten laid in months either. It's just me and my weekly unemployment check until I go to court and get fucked in the ass with these costs and punishments after which I can continue doing nothing until i'm all caught up. I won't get laid until then. I have no confience anymore. I'm in no shape to date anyone and i'd even feel guilty leading a girl on when I know that nothing will happen between us. There is no place for us to even have sex if we just decided to do only that. I am in no shape for a relationship at all. I am in no shape for anything until my life gets caught up but I will be so far behind by then that It'll just a joke at that point. What the fuck have I gotten myself into. If only I knew better than to hang out with such dumbass idiot friends.

    Fuck.
     
    Last edited: Jul 30, 2009
  2. Clancer

    Clancer New Member

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    How old are you? And honestly the only advice I can give is forget about what has happened in the past, and dont think about what will happen in the future. Focus on the present.

    Dont think about relationships right now, dont hang out with those friends, and most of all dont panic. Sometimes life doesnt go right for a long time, and the worst thing to do is just give up.

    I know youre short on money, but one thing that Id suggest you can do with no education for some side money is affiliate marketing. Since you know how to build and maintain your own site, aff. marketing probably wouldnt be too difficult for you and you can make SERIOUS money doing it if you put in a lot of time, have a lot of patience, and throw in a little bit of luck. Who knows, you could turn it into a career if youre really into it. I really dont know if this is the best thing for you to be doing right know but its just a suggestion for a little more possible money coming in every month. And the guys in the webmaster forum here could definitely help you out with it.

    http://www.nickycakes.com/newbie-guide/
     
  3. Darketernal

    Darketernal Watch: Aria The Origination =)

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    My suggestion is to KEEP ON FIGHTING!

    and `Yes , with friends like that who needs enemies'

    And you are right , sending you to a theraphist for which you have no money is no option, given that i can't recall that you stated your financial problems to this extend before. Anyway, lets start with what is most threatening, namely the 14 000$, ok, i've thought about it and i see it like this.

    A felony is a far bigger conviction then the misdemeanor, so in other words 14000 is a dramatic amount of money, but if convicted with a felony you'll be looking up to 30 000$ or even jail time, so by submitting to the misdemeanor you should see it as 'saving yourself 16 000$ :wtc: wtc included

    So basically its just another 'money punishment', to which you need to make amends with. My suggestion would be to write a letter of apologies, "i'll even do that for you if you want' to the owner of the golf course (or to whomever the damage was inflicted) adding your life story while begging to let the person drop the charges or lower the costs against you. This letter is dangerous in that you must NOT confess(confessing = get fined) of doing any damage, but i really want to know wether you actually did a lot of damage or not, because maby you can subtly shovle the blame to the other parties. I think writing this letter is worth every fricken second, because if you can convince the golf owner to drop the charges, and even convince to work for him to pay back the damage ,telling him how you want to become a fire fighter, working and saving people, anything to put you into a positive daylight and him forgiving what has been done is worth years of work to pay back the 14 000$, the letter must be written in such a way that it cannot be used against you in court.

    I want you to be 'aware' that a court uses a 'stacking system' , the more bad things you do, the multiplier on how bad you get punished increases 10 000 fold. Staying out of trouble = saving money/freeing yourself from stress and what not.

    You must shovle ALL the bad things out of your life continuesly like a garbage man. Never get drunk or intoxicated by whatever substance ever again, you can't afford it, not so much the drinking but more of the bad things you do after that, and the court cases that follow. Your situation is extremely messed up and it requires delicate balancing and enormous struggle to crawl out of the hell that you got yourself into, and it will take all effort to stay out of there as well.

    But in general you are doing the right thing, you need to keep climbing out of that hell hole, and you need to keep going for gold in your life until you end up in the positive. If anything gather the 14 000 already today, it doesn't mean already that you are going to pay off, but with this in sight, its important that you start buffering all the money you can already to fight off this bad omen.

    If you go for fighting the felony you will get screwed beyond your imagination. Always try to lower the sentence/fine, it works with classes, if you end up with a felony, then the judge/jury isn't going to be as lenient. Its too risky, especially since you really did it, if they are going to involve you with those other guys, you will be classified 'as one of them' , you have to be as much 'i want to have nothing to do with those people' as much as you can.

    Again Keep on fighting and going on with your bussiness, gather the 14 000 but let no one know about that you have that kind of money once you gather it, because if they know they can pluck you like a chicken they willl.

    These are very harsh life lessons, make sure you remember them well as you try to stay out of trouble for the rest of your life.
     
  4. disley

    disley Ooooh no it isn't. Ooooh yes it is. OT Supporter

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    Sometimes life sucks kid, it's hard at your age, but hang in there, things will improve.
     
  5. illectronic

    illectronic I'm Coming Home OT Supporter

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    That isn't so bad. In 2006 I spent most of the year in psych wards because of my addiction issues. I also garnered over $30000 in debt and had many strained relationships. If you don't know, a psych ward is not exactly a happy place to be in. I was so pissed that I lost "a year of my life". In fact I lost much more than that. 6 years of stunted emotional growth in addition to that because I was never able to grow while I was using. After finally getting clean I'm slowly getting my life back and graduated college. My credit is nearly fully repaired at this point. Don't think about the past too much or even about the future. Just stick to today and you'll be fine.
     
  6. illectronic

    illectronic I'm Coming Home OT Supporter

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    Also, today, money is not as important to me as my mental well being and my physical well being. That should come first before anything.
     
  7. Maximillion

    Maximillion New Member

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    Yeah, hang in there. Being held responsible for one's own criminal actions and having to pay restitution for damages caused to other peoples property... life can be cruel like that sometimes, you know.
     
  8. 7960

    7960 New Member

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    I'll be the dick........ sounds like most of your problems come from your friends, pressure from your ex-g/f, or stupid decisions you made.

    You got rid of the g/f (good).

    Now get rid of the friends.

    And in the future, don't make the same kind of stupid decisions they helped lead you to.



    I hope your dad's treatment helps him.
     
  9. Epicman

    Epicman Active Member

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    I think we all go through these bumps. It's all about taking the hits and moving forwards anyway you can. As long as you keep your head up, things will improve.
     
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2009
  10. Diesel66

    Diesel66 My standards for women is like rent-a-centers stan OT Supporter

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    why the fuck would you try selling cars in this environment ?
     
  11. Pepe

    Pepe New Member

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    you have a strong work ethic and drive from what it sounds like. rid yourself of the negative influences, remember that nothing in life gets handed to you (that only happens to other people), and shit will begin to turn for you.


    best of luck man, keep your head up.
     
  12. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    The letter actually sounds like an excellent idea maybe you can work your debt off on weekends or something by helping him out at the golf course. Doesn't hurt to explain your situation and hope he will have some compassion, we are all young once and making stupid ass mistakes.
     
  13. somethingstrang

    somethingstrang Active Member

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    You might still get the firefighter job with two misdemeanors. It sounds like the worst is almost over. This 14000 debt you'll get will hopefully be the last bad thing that happens to you. I'd say you just need to survive for a little bit longer. You got through the year, so I think you can go through another year that's only half as bad.
     
  14. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    I decided to go to trial and fight the felony. Hopefully everything goes OK but I'm expecting the worse. Yeah I fucked up big time...I'll never allow an idiot to even become my "buddy" or "friend", much less allow them to talk me into doing what I think is a stupid idea. You live and you learn. I can't fucking wait until this is all over...unless I get found guilty.
     
  15. Frito

    Frito New Member

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    I would definitely follow Darketernal's advice. Write the letter and try to get at least SOME of the charges dropped and get on the owner's good side. At this point (Don't mean to seem so hopeless) you have YEARS of work ahead of you. As in physical, labor work. What I would do is tackle it as hard as you can. I am assuming you're still young so you should have the energy to work multiple jobs. Seeing as to how the past mistakes have messed up your criminal record (all of which you brought upon yourself), it will be difficult to get a decent job. But there are PLENTY of ways. Newspaper distribution at night, construction, cleaning, landscaping, working in a warehouse as a physical laborer. If I were in your place, I would work day and night to pay off all that debt. It is good to see that you have matured to the point that you realize your mistakes, so obviously as it has been stated, avoid negative influences. If you continue this for some time, you should be able to pay off most of your debt. Just try to find any kind of money that you can (legally) and worry about that debt. You need to simplify. Anything that has any sort of value that is not a NECESSITY you should consider selling and put that money towards your debt.
    You have a LOONG road ahead of you, but you must keep your head up and continue to try and succeed. All things happen for a reason. Remember that the night is darkest before the sunrise. It seems like you are the lowest of lows so the good news is things can only get better (one way or another).
    Also, I hope your father is able to battle the cancer and defeat it. If anything, he will be able to recover and help out somehow.

    I hope this makes sense and if anyone sees any flaws in my ideas or has any better ones, feel free to point it out and correct it. I am not in your position but this is how I think I'd handle it
     
  16. Mulsanne

    Mulsanne The Man = Funk Fusion Chaos

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    make better decisions. you've no leg to stand on complaining about debt you incurred in the commision of a crime....twice.



    THINK BEFORE YOU ACT. plz
     
  17. Mulsanne

    Mulsanne The Man = Funk Fusion Chaos

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    you can always count on 7960 to tell it like it is
     
  18. Mulsanne

    Mulsanne The Man = Funk Fusion Chaos

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    :uh:

    oh....man....


    you should probably delete this thread because you pretty much admit guilt in it.

    Dude....cmon...use your head. Why in the world would you fight this...
     
  19. Bacardi 151

    Bacardi 151 New Member

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    Why would you go to trial? That seems like it isn't going to end very well.

    Good luck.
     
  20. familyguy101

    familyguy101 New Member

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    I'm fighting it because if I win then I will have a clean record and I won't have to pay any money back.
     
  21. Mulsanne

    Mulsanne The Man = Funk Fusion Chaos

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    delete this thread then.

    right now. Your foolishness seems to know no limits buddy...
     
  22. 7960

    7960 New Member

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    you mean the one where your "friends" turned on you and are going to testify against you so they don't go to jail and/or have to pay huge fines?




    .......you mean the one you're going to lose?


    Someone has to. I really would feel kind of bad (for a second) if nobody told this guy and continued to do the same shit without knowing he's the root of all his problems.
     
  23. Epicman

    Epicman Active Member

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    You think they will take your word over other people? One thing is you already have a criminal record from your previous misdemeanor....add to that the fact that it is several people testifying against you and, unless you have a very very very good(and expensive) lawyer, you aren't going to win.
     
  24. disley

    disley Ooooh no it isn't. Ooooh yes it is. OT Supporter

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    Have you talked to these people who've turned on you, what do they have to say for themselves, do they know the consequences of getting a rep as a nark, someone someday won't be as tolerant as you.
    I'm not advising you to break the law, but if it's possible, find out what exactly they've said and remind them they offered you the deal, but you didn't take it, and ask them why they didn't have the balls to keep their mouths shut.
    If I were you, I'd go and see the guy who's stuff was damaged, don't admit to anything, but tell him because you didn't stop them from doing it you feel responsibility to help him in anyway you can, and will come and work for him for free to help pay for the cost he incurred, he may let you, and some good could come of it.
     
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2009
  25. GregFarz78

    GregFarz78 New Member

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    why are you fighting a losing battle its their word against yours and you'll probably lose
     

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