SRS The ice on my heart melted a lil today *bit of a read*

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by zameil, May 11, 2008.

  1. zameil

    zameil OT Supporter

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    Ok I'll go through the events leading up to today in short form,
    10 years ago I lost my wife to cancer, we had a daughter in her time with me.
    7 years ago I hooked up with a crack ho drug addict who I thought I could change. Yes I was in love with her but in the end she told me she only loved me for about 3 years of the 7 and she spent the last 4 years with me for the sake of my daughter to my first marriage.

    Needless to say this had an effect on my trust towards women and so I wouldn't get hurt again I decided to cover my heart in ice and stone (metaphorically) just to be extra sure that no one would ever get in except for my Daughter whom I now have an awesome relationship with.

    So, A couple of weeks ago my daughter and I were out getting pizza when we happened across an accident. Seems a girl pulled out in front of this lady cyclist knocking her down.
    Me being a St Johns trained ambulancemen I have duty of care to stop and render assistance which I did.
    Turns out the woman was ok so we offerd her a lift home and on the way she got to talking to me so we exchanged numbers and I thought that was that.

    Two weeks ago I was cleaning out the truck when I came across her number, so I rang it to find out how she was? She was fine and very happy to hear from me.

    Last week I got a call from her (a total shock to me) and she suggested that we get together for a coffee, We set down today (Mothers day). I thought why not, what have I got to lose? So we met for brunch.

    Well, My god, this absolutely beautiful woman came down her stairs to greet me at her unit complex (last time I saw her she was all bruised and cut up with small cuts and abrasions all on her face and arms etc).
    She looked STUNNING!!!

    We got into my car and went to brunch.
    Well things were just really comfortable with her, we talked for hours over our meal and coffees. We have so much in common it's scarey.
    On the way back to her place I asked if she had time for desert at another cafe to which she agreed. Again, more chat. More in common.
    In the end I said
    "I think We're at the start of something great here" and she agreed.

    I dropped her off and she went to the gym and I went to my friends work (a 5 star hotel) and had a few beers with him and told him about how well the day went.

    I called her a little while ago and thanked her for a wonderful day and we agreed that we're going to see eachother again.

    I'll give it a couple of days then I'll call her again to try to organise a dinner or a movie next weekend.

    Right now I'm feeling like the luckiest guy on the face of the planet. If anything I've made a quality friend and in one day this woman has unfucked what I've spent years hardening up.

    I write this for those who have just broken up with their SO's and are feeling bad, Trust me, life does go on.

    Thanks for reading it.
     
    Last edited: May 11, 2008
  2. Joybang

    Joybang New Member

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    Congrats man. It really is a great feeling to meet someone after a breakup that makes you see life goes on. You can tell yourself it does but until that point you meet someone who you share a lot in common with and have a great time with it doesn't seem real. Take it slow and enjoy it. Good luck.
     
  3. Lucky Penny

    Lucky Penny Mr. cut me some slack cause I don't wanna go back,

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    First I was like :eek3: then I was all :wtc: then I was kinda :noes: but now I'm all :big grin: and :h5:

    :rofl: What a great story!! That totally made my weekend. Congratulations to the both of you :big grin:
     
  4. arsbu

    arsbu New Member

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    congrats

    i hope everything works perfectly
     
  5. lost04

    lost04 justme

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    that's inspiring.
    i hope my ice will melt one day. :)
    best of luck
     
  6. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    *fixed

    (this is now a haiku)
     
  7. CT Cubs Fan

    CT Cubs Fan New Member

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    Thanks man, I really needed to read something like that this weekend.

    Best of luck to you.
     
  8. Bugalu

    Bugalu OT Supporter

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    great read, and i wish the best! :bigthumb:
     
  9. 04JETTA

    04JETTA OT Supporter

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    :bigthumb: keep it up
     
  10. ///M

    ///M New Member

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    nice :bigthumb:
     
  11. Paulie Walnuts

    Paulie Walnuts Im an agent of chaos

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    After my wife fucked me over 7 weeks ago and I found out recently that there is another guy I really dont think that the ice will melt anytime soon. Congrats though, at least one of us is happy.
     
  12. zameil

    zameil OT Supporter

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    Thanks guys and gals, I wrote this to let people know that good things can and sometimes do happen.
    I was probobly the biggest skeptic when it coms to things like this but here it is in front of me.

    Keep your chin up people
    I've had a lot to deal with,
    Serious injury (Motorcycle accident)
    Loss of my first wife
    Mental breakdown
    Drug addict SO
    Sole parent
    Loss of house, financial security
    Loss of Mother
    Father has cancer
    Turfed out Drug addict SO
    Drug addict brother
    SO has now moved in with brother (as flatmates only, ahem)
    Raising a 13yo girl on my own, working upwards of 50hrs a week

    Though evenually, if you've got enough guts not to let anything get to you things can change for the best I know it's hard but you can shine through.
     
  13. ASoT

    ASoT New Member

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    Is that a sonnet? :rofl:
     
  14. daneeyah

    daneeyah Guest

    Very inspiring.. thanks for posting :)
     
  15. zameil

    zameil OT Supporter

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    Update 15:5:08

    Well I called her last night, she wasn't home so I left a message on her machine. I've got her cell phone number but I don't want to come off as being insecure or pushy.

    Today at work I got a call fom her, She apologised for not returning the call as she was out to dinner with some friends, No biggie we talked for a lil while and I suggested that we get together for dinner and a movie on Sat night.
    It' s on.
    Now I've got to pick a movie, and organise all the times to meet etc.

    My Daughter is going to her friends place Sat night so I'll be free.

    Now a Question that OT can help me with.

    While at the movies should I suggest that we do dinner Sunday night and make it something really simple like a bottle of wine and a pizza on the beach at sunset?
    Or
    Should I just let it go and call her the following week?

    Thanks in advance.
     
  16. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    Congrats. You deserve to be happy :)
     
  17. HardTech

    HardTech hungry

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    if I'm not mistaken, this is your 2nd date? And you are thinking about doing a dinner on the beach?

    I dunno, I wouldn't do that if I were you. If anything, I'd take her to a nice restaurant where you have to dress up a bit, then to the theater or symphony hall.

    Then when you drop her off, go in for the kiss.

    I've never had this combination NOT work
     
  18. ASoT

    ASoT New Member

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    I don't think a movie date is such a good idea right now. It's a bit too early for that. It sounded like you guys had a lot of chemistry talking for hours to each other. During a movie, you just sit there for 2 hours and it could kill the vibe, make her bored, or tired.

    See how it goes on Saturday before you make any suggestions for Sunday. If all goes well, you could do something during the day on Sunday. Go walk in the park with some bread and feed the ducks, go for a bike ride together, etc. Just be creative and do simple, fun things. It'll impress her. Last night I went to Walmart and bought a jigsaw puzzle, grabbed a bottle of wine, and headed to my girlfriends place for a night of drinking and attempting the puzzle. Of course I threw in my own rules about clothes coming off as we progressed. Needless to say, we got about halfway through the puzzle and jumped into bed.
     
  19. doggystylin

    doggystylin New Member

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    wow thats a great story, really need to hear something like that to keep the hope alive.

    oh and thats something i never really liked about going to movies, you can't really talk to each other

    btw if you don't mind me asking, where do you live? cause i can't imagine a thing like that happening here in L.A.
     
  20. Lucky Penny

    Lucky Penny Mr. cut me some slack cause I don't wanna go back,

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    at your mom's house. be back later.
    :werd: Personally, I'd go for something a little more interactive than a movie this early. However, that's just me :dunno:
     
  21. zameil

    zameil OT Supporter

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    Thanks guys and gals,
    We kinda have agreed to dinner and a movie. On our 1st "date" as such we got all dressed nice and we said to eachother that the next date would be more casual as we agreed that as nice as it is to look good for eachother if we were going to at least hang together we should be able to be casual as well.
    I'm an old fashioned kinda guy and was raised with the gentleman always pays routine which I did on the last date. Where I know that in this day and age there should be equality. So I was going to suggest this for the dinner on Sunday night that she buys the pizzas and I get the wine.
    I should say that the Sunday night dinner is just a casual thing to spend more time with her.
    Problem is I don't want to come across as being needy or clingy towards her. I just like her company.
    Shes a divorcee and was in an overbearing relationship previously So I know I've got to tread carefully.

    I plan on doing a more formal evening in the near future all things working out that is.

    Ohh Nearly forgot, Doggystylin I live on the Gold Coast in Australia. As close to LA as you're going to get outside the States.
     
  22. hurleywurley

    hurleywurley OT Supporter

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    wow, an amazing story
    just when i think i can't pull myself out of depression, i read a story of someone who has persevered through something harder than i could imagine :hs: and it gives me hope
     
  23. zameil

    zameil OT Supporter

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    Update
    19.05.08

    We went to the movies and dinner was great. She's got an injured leg at the moment so its upsetting her and making her a lil grumpy I could tell.

    So shes going interstate next week so I'll chill it for a while and call her later.

    I also found out my Ex is screwing one of the guys she moved out with. :wtc:
     
  24. Lucky Penny

    Lucky Penny Mr. cut me some slack cause I don't wanna go back,

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    at your mom's house. be back later.
    :confused: Sorry, stupid American here... what's going interstate? She she going on vacation?

    I'm so pumped that your dates have been going so well!! That's so fantastic :coold:

    Don't waste any more thought to your Ex. She's an ex for a reason. Besides, you've now got a little gem on your hands- stay focused on that :big grin:
     

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