SRS Stress

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by auero, Apr 29, 2007.

  1. auero

    auero word.

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    The passed three-four months have been extremely rough for me. I've had tough times but never like this. Within two months alone, I've lost three friends in car accidents. I honestly can't handle another funeral. I feel as I'm doing nothing with my life. I'm 19, I attend a community college which I don't have any motivation to go to anymore. I don't believe school is something for me. I don't have a job because I became ill from the stress and anxiety which basically forced me to quit work and now it's difficult to find another. I don't feel as I'm going anywhere in life (which I'm not). I hate living in my town, I'm judged by a lot of people for no reason or some people just don't like me because I'm friends with a certain person or because of a girl (immature baby stuff). I value my friendship with my close friends but their idea of fun is drinking constantly. I don't mind partying but I don't feel its necessary so often. My relationship with my parents is rocky, I get really moody from the stress and I tend to bring it out on them.

    I'm an only child and I've grown up alone for the most part so I feel that the only time I'm comfortable and happy is when I'm by myself, doing something alone. I don't know if this is healthy because it looks like I'm anti-social or something. When I went to school in Florida, I was there all alone, on my own without my parents and honestly I was very happy. I didn't know anyone, I did what I had to do, I had a lot of motivation to go to school. I had friends I kept in touch with at home and made a few friends at school, that was fine.

    I guess all I want to do is shut everyone out of my life and do what's for me and only me. I debated on just finding two crappy jobs and working all day through my summer. I have a friend that wants me to move with him to Phili but I don't think it would be a wise move for me. For some reason I seem happy when I find a girl I like. It motivates me but that always fails. Everything starts going good in life and it just fails over and over and over.

    Does anyone have any advice on this? Should I be worried about myself and seek help (I don't think it's that serious but)? I've really been struck with back luck for too long and I just want to give up on everything. I'm out of ideas on what to do.
     
    Last edited: Apr 29, 2007
  2. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    I'm really sorry you lost soo many friends in such a short period of time. That's hard for anyone to handle and all the other things you describe seem to stem from these deaths.

    I hope you realize that losing people we care about is a very traumatic thing. It causes a lot of stress and grief isn't something that can be "worked off". It's not like you can just exercise the grief away or work harder and ignore it and it'll go away. It takes time to work through grief and there are some things you can do to speed up the process but everyone works through grief in their own way and time. It usually takes months and sometimes years to get through the grief.

    Death of loved ones brings us face to face with the folly of life. I mean everything seems so fake becasue we'll all die someday anyways...what's the point?? When one is constantly focusing on the fact that everything will end one day, it's awfully hard to get motivated to do anything at all.

    Today I chose to engage in life simply because I'm alive and while I'm alive, I want to experience good things in life. There are no guarantees but I believe that if I work hard, set goals that are meaningful to me, then work to accomplish those goals....that my life will become more berable and hopefully more fun also. But this is hard to do when I'm hurting and missing my friends/family that have passed.

    You might want to seek some professional help...not because you are "that bad" but because they really can help. I've grown enormously by seeking out professional help.
     
  3. auero

    auero word.

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    I keep running this through my head in what could be wrong or how to better myself.

    I can set goals for myself and I can stick to them, however my friends and 'drama'( if you want to call it) side track me, preventing my to obtain my goals and I can't just tell all my friends "hey back off, I'll see you in a few months". I need a break but I don't know how I can do it.
     
  4. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    I tell my friends this all the time. I'm finishing up my second degree and at times, I have to study. Sure I could just "get by" or "wing it" but getting the highest grades possible is my goal. I've made a choice to make it a priority in my life. At some point, there will be conflict between competing priorities and I have to choose. I used to choose my friends and fun....now I choose my priorities. Why?? Becasue I have found that my friends will understand and be there when I"m done. Also, not accomplishing my goals is something that is totally preventable by me.

    IMO it's all about choice.
     
  5. Spiritus

    Spiritus Active Member

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    Definitely seek counseling, you are going to need to talk to a professional about this, and who here at OT has been in the medical field for 8 years in psychotherapy? Set up an appointment.
     
  6. JustJeff

    JustJeff www.youtube.com/thisisjustjeff

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    After what happened April 16th here at Virginia Tech, i was distrought. I was depressed and I just didn't want to do anything. I was angry, annoyed, sad, and worried all at the same time.

    I scheduled an appointment on campus and talked to psychologist at our Counseling center. I have to say, it was the best decision I could of ever made. I felt amazing right after. I set up another appointment the week later to get the rest of the shit out of me. I have another meeting coming up this wednesday and it will be the last before I go home.

    Take what Spiritus said: find someone to talk to. There should be a counseling service on campus and you can find someone to talk to. If you don't like it, then you don't have to go, but it's worth the shot.
     
  7. auero

    auero word.

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    I guess I'm ashamed to seek help? I just can't push myself to go do it. Things have been getting better but it's still so much. There were points where I'd wake up with panic attacks and really couldn't breathe. I'll try my campus counciler I suppose and see how it goes, if I can actually get in there.
     
  8. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    It's not a sign of weakness to seek help...it's a sign of being human.
     

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