Stop Stealing

Discussion in 'OT Technology' started by RunninWild, Apr 26, 2006.

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  1. RunninWild

    RunninWild How subtle of you

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    My Megahootz.
     
  2. cmsurfer

    cmsurfer ºllllllº

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    Uh... Stop wasting bandwith? :dunno:
     
  3. P07r0457

    P07r0457 New Member

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    stop stealing....


    my click.
     
  4. EvilSS

    EvilSS New Member

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    You just stole my time. I'm suing under the DCMA for damages.
     
  5. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    My main computer is an 800mhz G4 iBook, which is strange because they even had 866mhz G3 iBooks, but suffice it to say that my iBook is way slow. At least its pretty. So anyway I live in a converted commercial building: it used to be the EPA, now its condo lofts. My ISP provides ethernet connections, and through NAT we're all on a big 10.X network and share the internet. Its a line of sight rooftop wireless network to a big fat pipe at HQ. This connection used to be great, and I don't even pay for it, but lately they have capped bit torrent and... like I said, I don't pay so who can I bitch to?

    As I was lacking in megahootz, I created and implemented the following scheme. I did some math and... there are 180 units in this building. Probably HALF of those have the same ISP as me. And most of those computers run faster clock speeds than mine so... I set out to work. I downloaded, compiled, and ran nmap to find other computers on the building wide LAN. There were 33 computers there, as many as 53 in total, up to 20 more in the evenings after people brought their notebooks home from work. I profiled each machine, and began to rootor them. I would look at the system's properties, and then go around the building with my scanner and a directional antennae, and with the blueprints they have downstairs I was able to pin point the physical location of each PC according to its clock speed, which I heard resonating on my scanner. I hacked together a custom ICMP based monitor using Nagios and created a 3D map of my building showing the physical location of each PC, and its status at the moment. Looking at that image, I felt like the building, and its electronic nervous system, was my friend. I stopped taking calls. I stopped bathing. I stopped going outside. Chinese delivery boxes littered the floor. I worked, and worked, and worked in front of that evil picture of my, yes MY building and every node within.

    Why the obsession you say? Because I had an evil plan. Having rootored every machine in the building and installed a rootkit on each, I would now steal their megahootz. How? I created client software to use each machine, be it Windows, Linux or OS X, as a great distributed cluster for my evil purposes. I hacked my MACH kernel to farm out computations to these computers which had more mehahootz than I. As the limiting factor in this cluster was the bandwidth of my connetion, I setup a new compression method of my own device on each link, and soon I was leaching 10% of the megahootz of each computer in the building. Even the notebooks would slow down some when they connected via wireless. My 800mhz iBook was performing as though it were a MacBook Pro, and all was well. I could watch movies in VLC, simultaneously view pron in Quicktime, while compiling programs for other evil schemes and whoring OT: all at once. It was done.

    But it was not enough. Its never enough. I began to raise the percentage of megahootz I stole. 20%. Then 30%. At the end of three months, I was stealing 90% of the megahootz of every computer in the building. I even rootored their cisco switch, and stole 50% of the megahootz of that... even though it was slower than my iBook. I couldn't control myself! I was out of control! I broke into the data closet and installed a gigabit connection between myself and the other switches, even upgrading theirs with gigabit ports. I began thinking about replacing all the switches with gigabit, and making mine 10 gigabit. I put ads up around the lobby for new and faster machines hoping that the megahootz taxed would upgrade, as their computers got slower and slower. I WAS INSANE!

    And thats when they came... the men in the White Van. I saw it below. They had come to take their megahootz back. I left that apartment that day, iBook in hand and ran down fifteen flights of stairs, got in my car, ran down the security gate that would not open (I was stealing too much megahootz from the computer that controlled it), and never looked back. I've been on the run ever since, for I took those megahootz which were not mine and some day, some place, some time... I'll have to pay for that. But not today.
     
    Last edited: Apr 26, 2006
  6. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Peyomp: Rescuing shit threads since 1999.
     
  7. GlassUser

    GlassUser send an email not a pm OT Supporter

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    werd
     
  8. P07r0457

    P07r0457 New Member

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    Ban for lying, and bringing back shit threads....

    Remember, there was no intraweb before OT, and you registered in 02.
     
  9. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    You ungrateful piece of shit!

    1) This thread now kicks ass. Bow before me you fucking grumpy ogre.

    2) I was rescuing threads other places before this.

    3) I registered before Jan 2002, but lost my password, so Fazle RESET it in 2002 and that is what the date indicates. I am a deserved OG, but I don't get the cred.
     
  10. P07r0457

    P07r0457 New Member

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    Definitely not kick-ass.

    Incorrect. Teh intraweb did not exist before OT.

    Impersonating OG is deserving of permaban.
     
  11. RunninWild

    RunninWild How subtle of you

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    O why dont you go join a vigalante group
     
  12. D1G1T4L

    D1G1T4L Active Member

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    cool story, if u wrote a book i would buy it
     
  13. Pet3R

    Pet3R Active Member

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    is that Spanish?
     
  14. Doc Brown

    Doc Brown Don't make me make you my hobby

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    Well good luck with that!
     
  15. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    Yeah, the email changed as well.
     
  16. eskarinna

    eskarinna New Member

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    don you people have anything better to do o_O


    oh wait nvm i am at work too ><!
     
  17. Peyomp

    Peyomp New Member

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    As I pointed out in another thread... I was on the toilet without toilet paper. I had some time to kill, cause I was dreading getting up to scavenge. I ended up using a paper bag and then showering down.
     
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