Stop Making Excuses

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by i dangled you, May 23, 2007.

  1. I've been recently spending time with a new group of friends and they are all interesting people. The one thing they lack is the ability to approach women. I've told them on numerous occasions to talk to a girl and they never do. They say she's too good looking, or she's not interested, or something to that nature, making excuses. This is a fundamenal problem.

    I have seen people in the Vag and even IRL make excuses because of some unknown reason. When you ask them about things, they sit there and try and justify their actions. I'll take Falconer as a perfect example, Falconer overanalyzes everything, then says he will do something and then makes an excuse why he didn't or doesn't. I don't see that going anywhere. We have Kotchy who says he has too high of standards, but then goes to post about sleeping with a Fat Chick, this too high of standards was clearly an excuse for his lack of action. We have Floppycock who justifies his actions through not wanting to be alpha. This is another fundamental excuse. All of you stop making excuses.

    We have so many people on here, that we tell to do something. I'm not saying don't question people who give you advice, but when we give it and it's clear it makes no sense why when it has been tried and tested that someone will do the exact opposite and ignore it. Then when asked about it they give a half-hearted excuse.

    I watch people at work, when asked to do something, and later when it's checked to see if it is done, why it wasn't accomplished, they make excuses. This is not the method to be using. The more excuses you make, the more you set yourself up to fail.

    Now the point of this post if it is not clear to anyone is, stop making excuses for your lack of action or your failures. Think long and hard, learn from that mistake and don't make it again. It is that simple to be successful in life, nothing hard or complex here. Stop making excuses.

    Beasty
     
  2. Miss Red

    Miss Red New Member

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    While I completely agree qith you, one must remember that we are online, and are not there in real life with that person usually to observe that situation or to see why your advice wasn't executed. One must also remember that we are online, and people may lie about things or manipulate the way they explain their situations so that its different.
     
  3. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    But what if I do actually have really high standards? :noes:
     
  4. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    Do you have a hard on for me or something? This is the second thread that you've mentioned me in.
     
  5. Do we need to get into this argument again, as an OP once said, we are just arguing semantics now.

    You are the best example I can think of, if you don't like it, don't put yourself out there.
     
  6. gabacho numero uno

    gabacho numero uno New Member

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    I've really started to get past this mental block now. As far as I'm concerned I'll do whatever I need to, change whatever I need to about myself, to get with the girl/s I want.
     
  7. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    Don't change though, just improve. Because if you become something you aren't and get a girl you will be happy as fuck for a while, but then will start to resent the girl that she isn't into you for you, but someone you are acting like IMO.
     
  8. gabacho numero uno

    gabacho numero uno New Member

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    If I change my style, that will eventually become who I am. I'm quite happy with the change if it produces positive results, it won't bother me to change. I'll still be who I am at the core of my being, I'll still be a good person when it comes down to it, I'll still have my sense of humor, it's just that those traits will have better packaging, you could say. I've been the kind of person I need to be to get chicks all along. I just need to let it out more and give it a better presentation*.

    *note: for the kind of chicks I want, not women in general

    Has anyone else ever done this or heard of it? Tayloring a specific style for a specific type of woman? Basically, you sit down and decide "the kind of chicks I want are into hip hop, so I'll try to appeal to them" or "the kind of chicks I want are into alternative rock, so I'll try to appeal to them". I did read in a PUA book once that you should figure out what kind of women you want to be with and base what you do to improve yourself on that.
     
  9. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    I just want yo make sure you know the difference between changing yourself and improving yourself, because there is a big difference.

    Now yes I have heard of doing that, but it is more of a teenager type thing. In a few more years you won't really need to do that. Don't jump on me for saying that, because it is true - you just won't know that for a few more years.
     
  10. Chip Chipperson

    Chip Chipperson New Member

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    groucho I think you might be confusing changing your clothing and other first-level impression things, with genuine value and interest changes.

    Having certain interests - those are not the core things that will attract or repel women.
     
  11. gabacho numero uno

    gabacho numero uno New Member

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    I know the difference. And I'm well aware it's more of a thing younger people do. But for now my age range is 18-22 and the kinda girls I like are that way now. Of course things begin to work differently as you get further away from adolescence and become more a part of the "adult world". I know that while this will be acceptable now, it won't work anymore 10 years from now.

    These days though, does it seem like people in their 20s act like teens for longer than they used to? My brother is 29 and he is still into a lot of popular music, has a "style" of dress, rather than just normal clothes etc.

    I knew of a ton of people at the community college here who were in their mid to late 20s and still that way. Just saying.

    I think at this stage in the game both do. But I do understand the difference between the two and that the values & interests are vastly more important. I think the very fact that my attitude has changed should demonstrate to you that that part is changing with me too.
     
  12. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    Dude I am only 23, and don't need to change my clothes to get girls of different types. I was picking up raver/club girls in TO on the weekend, and I don't look like a raver at all. My clothes have nothing to do with my ability to have my personality shine through. But using crutches is a great way to learn, just learn to work without them eventually.
     
  13. gabacho numero uno

    gabacho numero uno New Member

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    I see what you're saying. but like I said, I've known quite a few people who are still that way in their mid to late 20s.
     
  14. driftwell

    driftwell New Member

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    just wanted to say that the OP's message is golden!

    i think alot of us justify our lack of action or failure to make ourselves feel better.

    But i also want to say that sometimes there are valid excuses, especially in the work environment (if you had my boss... or bosses i should say, you'd understand). On the other hand, most excuses when it comes to talking to girls are just that... excuses.

    I do the same thing still sometimes... everything has to be "perfect" before i can approach, she has to be facing me at a 38 degree angle, i have to see her look at me at least twice, one of them for at least 3 seconds or longer, i have to have a good hair day, the stars have to be aligned...

    haha... all just excuses
     
  15. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    You missed the entire point of my thread, and now you're bandying it around like a trophy.

    I mean, I agree with most of your post. I really do think that any given person is capable of doing pretty much anything. But you need to realize that not everybody is like you. Not everybody feels the burning need to change. Some people are happy with who and what they are, and don't take your advice because they don't feel like they need to.
     
  16. You miss the point of being human in this day and age: to strive to become better through every action you take. You are still making excuses but I'm not going to clutter up this thread to make you see the light that is clearly shining in your face. Note: This has nothing to do with alpha maleness.

    For those that are happy with who they are, they are clearly willing to settle for mediocrity. No matter how good you are at something, you can always become better at it.
     
  17. Coottie

    Coottie BOOMER......SOONER OT Supporter

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    What I find really sad and pathetic is that you feel the need to call out others in the vag. Make your points without specifically mentioning anyone. The quoted post reeks of you having serious inferiority issues and you need to call others out and put them down to make you feel better about yourself.

    Knock that shit off dude.
     
  18. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    If I like who I am, why should I take advice I disagree with? I think that a hefty amount of people you give advice to don't take it because they like themselves and think you're wrong.

    I'm not trying to clutter your thread, and you have no right to complain even if I did, but you're stuck in this mindset that anybody who disagrees with you is inferior and making excuses. You're all about self improvement and learning, how can you learn when you block out dissent?
     
  19. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    You are right, some people don't feel like they need to change. But those asking for advice and insight into why they aren't getting girls obviously (although maybe happy with who they are) need to improve themselves in order to attract women. So stop fucking arguing about us telling people to improve themselves in the Vag, that's what this place is for (You still don't seem to understand this).
     
  20. Take it or leave it for what it is, either way it is not my concern.
     
  21. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    Why are you so threatened by somebody who disagrees with your idea of self improvement?
     
  22. Human nature is to improve, you are fundamentally saying that self improvement (the point of the vag) is not needed. While it is the exact opposite.

    Not threatened, just showing your flawed logic.
     
  23. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    How do you figure I am threatened? If anything you are the one that comes across as threatened since you jump on anyone giving advice/answers to questions asked.

    This place is somewhere that anyone can ask questions, and you seem to not want anyone to answer these questions. You don't like the answers - that is fine, I honestly don't care. But that doesn't mean I am going to stop posting because you get offended when I tell people to be more confident in who they are.
     
  24. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    I've never asked you, or anybody, to stop posting, but I have disagreed with you. Every time I disagree, I provide an alternative. Just because you don't like my answer to somebody's question doesn't mean I'm not giving one.

    I've never said this.

    All I did was disagree with some of the ideologies preached here like gospel.
     
  25. XaPU!M

    XaPU!M Active Member

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    I disagreed with you in one thread man, and you now freak anytime I respond to you. All I said above was yes there are those that don't want to change who they are. But those that do are asking question and we are answering them... yet somehow I keep offending you.
     

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