Somebody please help me interpret what the hell she wants out of this..

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Inferno, Nov 27, 2008.

  1. Inferno

    Inferno New Member

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    This is my first post in here in hopes for a solid answer, and frankly just a place to vent...

    A little background info on me.. ive been with girls in the past, but ive never wanted a real relationship, this girls the first one i've wanted something more with. Honestly, her personality isn't even the greatest, but shes absolutely gorgeous, a solid 9/10, thats why its so hard to just let her go, despite all our problems. This may seem shallow, but its justified in my head :o I guess when things are good, they're real good :wiggle:

    So we've been seeing each other for quite a while.. a few months now, but it hasn't been very smooth. We go like 3-4 days without talking sometimes.. and it gets to me and we end up only talking after these days because I start a convo, never her. About a month and a half ago, after not talking for like 4-5 days, I ask her to talk because clearly somethings wrong. To make thing short, she pretty much tells me that shes felt different about us because a couple weeks before that, she was the one to kiss me first. Yeah, really.. she was mad about that. Sure, I guess I should've kissed her first, as traditionally the guy does, but shes older than me by a year, cute as hell and I guess I was just a little nervous because, like I said, I actually wanted something out of this so I didnt want to mess anything up. Night sums up with her saying she feels differently about me.. and I'd give her time to think about it. She finds out my friends think shes shallow because of this and she texts me saying "I dont want to be with someone who thinks im shallow". I take it as this was her ending it.. so the next night (halloween), Im drunk as shit and make out with one of the girls i was seeing in the past. She finds out, cries and all that BS, tells me how she thought about it all it she wanted to make things work and now i "cheated" on her, etc, etc, and how her text didnt mean she wanted to end it. Okay, next week is a bit rough but we make up.. and we're all happy..

    Then it happens again, we dont talk for a few days, doesnt make an effort to say anything on msn, etc.. she pretty much stops putting any effort into it altogether, it killlllls me. So I'm pissed.. that weekend we see eachother at a party. She doesn't say a word to me. (her excuse was she didnt see me) So I'm really really pissed and I walk up to her. She smiles and says hi, I'm like "hi... its over, ok?" infront of all her friends... she calls me later sayin she hates me more then anything in the world, etc, etc... so next day we're talking, im trying to apologize for making it so harsh, etc.. but she keeps saying she doesnt want to talk. So I end up saying "well i tried...have a nice life" and ignore a couple of her texts, i tell this her that we can talk later on that night. We talk, i tell her to stop playing dumb little games and she needs to start showing she cares, etc. and everythings good. This was sunday night, its now thursday and we STILL haven't hungout and barely talked.. our convos are always short and she puts no effort into them.

    So thats pretty much our turbulant relationship summed up. What I'm trying to show is, if she didn't like me at all, she would've let me go after all this, right? If so, then why doesn't she ever seem to want to hangout/talk like she used to?

    Phewf... that feels better :hs:
     
  2. GanglyGoodness

    GanglyGoodness .

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    She (you both) sounds extremely immature. She also doesn't sound interested at all; how old are you two? Your best bet would to just move on and forget about the drama.
     
  3. Inferno

    Inferno New Member

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    :rofl: :rofl: It sounds immature im sure, but I'm summing up the worst parts of our relationship. If I wanted to just "move on" then I wouldn't be making this thread, I want to understand her. I'm 19, shes 20.
     
  4. Abomb

    Abomb New Member

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    low interest
     
  5. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    What is there to tell you?

    She has a little bit of interest in you, but not a whole lot, so she wants you to do all the work of chasing her, to which she will only respond if the mood strikes her.

    You're wasting your time, and she will disappear as soon as someone she really likes comes along.

    Just move on, this one's not worth the time, energy, or drama.
     
    Last edited: Nov 27, 2008
  6. Priddo

    Priddo New Member

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    Give her the flick - don't talk to her again if possible and find someone else.
     
  7. Vysion

    Vysion New Member

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    She's a drama queen and you're not experienced enough to handle her.

    It sounds like you're clingy and insecure about the relationship, and a hot babe will pick up on this fast. A hot babe will have hundreds of guys trying to get her attention. Any slight downfall of confidence and she will lose any and all attraction for you.

    She called you after you broke it off with her because you acted like a man for once and took the power away from her. She wanted to see if you'd act like a man again or if you'd buckle under her test.

    If you try to get back with her it will continue to be turbulent. That's how some women are, that's how she sounds.

    Put it all in the past as a good memory and move on with your life. Keep meeting more women and if you're lucky you'll meet a stable one.
     
  8. Inferno

    Inferno New Member

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    it sounds like you guys have us figured out.. is there any hope to fix things? From what you're saying (which makes sense) is that she wants a man with confidence. So I could either stop acting like I care, just like shes doing.. and if she actually wants something from this she will react, or I could start trying again but acting more confident, but I guess I'm not sure how exactly I'm not acting confident. :dunno:

    I'm much rather make this work then simply let her go like you guys are suggesting, its much easier said than done :o
     
  9. evh

    evh Active Member

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    No, dude. It's already been said.

    She has a little bit of liking towards you, but not a whole lot. If you contact her and the mood strikes her, she'll respond positively. When she finds someone she really likes a lot, you're out.
     
  10. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    sounds to me like she has read and follows "The Rules"

    if you want to keep seeing this girl, you having to chase her down is not going to change

    personally, i prefer women that come to me (but different strokes for different folks, right?)
     
  11. Inferno

    Inferno New Member

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    theres gotta be a way to get her to like me more :o

    if not then i guess i'll have to let this ship sail.. but like I said already, its the first time ive had real feelings for a girl so its going to be a tough ride if it comes down to that
     
  12. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    Not really. Even if there is, it's not worth the effort it would take.

    You're young. It seems like you have real feelings...but they aren't the real feelings you want to have in a relationship. You're lusting after a girl who is not that interested in you, and disrespects you.

    Everybody goes through this a couple of times.

    I guarantee, if you had a relationship with a girl who liked you and respected you, you wouldn't give this girl a second thought.
     
  13. Inferno

    Inferno New Member

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    I guess why I'm trying to defend this is because I know for a fact that she actually liked me a lot very recently.. and I've always been a believer that people don't just lose feelings for each other so suddenly.. i guess I just think shes playing dumb little games, but maybe you're all right and she has lost interested somehow :o
     
  14. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :barf: People who have this mentality just don't get it.

    Think about this:
    Why on earth would you want to be with someone that truly didn't already want to be with you? Why would you want to be with someone that you had to try for weeks, months, years to impress just to give you a chance? Why can't you just accept that not everyone is meant fo each other.

    Guys always seem to have this thought that every girl they like is right for them, but they are not! There are billions of women out there and this one isn't really that interested in you. You are 19 years old kid, just because she's the first chick you've had feelings for doesn't mean she's "the one" :uh: Experience the thousands of women who live within a 100 miles radius of you instead and move on from her.
     
  15. Inferno

    Inferno New Member

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    Youre right.. i shouldnt have said that and I agree a hundred percent, but I guess what I should've said was "theres gotta be a way to allow her to be comfortable showing she likes me" because I truly believe that she still does and shes playing stupid immature games

    I understand what you guys are saying.. i guess only time will tell
     
  16. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    But again, if her playing games > than her just being with you it shows she really doesn't care about you as much as you'd hope. If a girl can't get past her issues or games to be with someone she likes then it's just not going to ever work. Not to mention she's your typical 20 year old girl and your relationship would probably last <6 months anyway due to immaturity. Hence why dating around and having fun is :bigthumb: at your age.
     
  17. Inferno

    Inferno New Member

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    six months is better than nothing :o

    :hs:
    really not what i wanted to hear
     
  18. Midgetized

    Midgetized Don't mess with Douche Cat

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    :bowrofl: you don't even know what real feelings are. Real feelings means you would like her for her personality, not because she's hot and you know you can't get any better. Why should she bother wasting her time with you? You only like her because you like the status it brings by having a hot girl with you, you don't actually care about her.
     
  19. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :werd:
     
  20. Inferno

    Inferno New Member

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    thats not true at all.. the girl that I made out on halloween was equally, if not better looking... ANDshe likes me, AND she has a better personality.. but I just can't see myself with her for some strange reason
     
  21. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Does she want you?
     
  22. Inferno

    Inferno New Member

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    yeah.. on the night we made out, she conciously did it so she could show that she likes me more than the other guy she was seeing
     
  23. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Then that's why. All you want is the chase. Once you have the girl this thread is about she would only be arm candy and something for you to boost your ego over, nothing more. Hope you grow up a little :)
     
  24. Inferno

    Inferno New Member

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    I dont understand your philosophy behind this.. if I wanted a girl to boost my ego over then I could easily just date the one that likes me, i just cant see myself dating her and I knew this before i knew she liked me.

    I want the girl that this thread is over because I like her, and thats that.
     
  25. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    let me guess, she's of Asian decent of some kind, isn't she? :mamoru:
     

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