Some douche sent my girl flowers @ her work

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by EBK, Sep 8, 2008.

  1. EBK

    EBK Hate hippies & hadjis

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    We're dating. Her ex-boyfriend has called a few times over the last couple of days playing the "depression" card. Also, one of her male friends invited her to a kickback.. when she returned his call after leaving my house one night he admitted on the phone he had a crush on her after she let him know about 'us' dating.

    I told her -- in a nice and comforting way-- to tell her ex to fuck off and to nevermind the male friend.

    It seems she's not getting it thru. Should I confront these dudes? I don't have their numbers or addresses but I was thinking of sending them a message on MySpace? Shits aggravating
     
  2. 1.8t

    1.8t Member

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    You sure your girl is actually trying to convey the message?
     
  3. EBK

    EBK Hate hippies & hadjis

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    I'm not 100% sure. Is that enough reasoning for me to take the initiative to tell them?
     
  4. EBK

    EBK Hate hippies & hadjis

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    She sent me a text 20 mins ago asking if I sent them; with the words written: "guess who"

    How should I respond?
     
  5. THoC

    THoC New Member

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    pulling the myspace/calling them/going to their homes card is not a good idea.

    let me put it this way. when someone is in a relationship whose job is it put an end to flirting? its the person in the relationship! not the single guys that are hitting on her.

    is it respectful of them to hit on her? maybe not. but if they dont know you they dont owe you any respect.

    your girl is the one that owes it to you. she should be the one telling these guys to fuck off. not you.

    you doing it makes you seem possesive and not confident.
     
  6. vodkacollins

    vodkacollins New Member

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    bad idea to contact them. its rude of them to chase after her when they know she has a bf, but she needs to stop the contact if they are going to keep disrespecting the relationship. the fact that she isnt is a problem
     
  7. GTLifter

    GTLifter Banned

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    "nope"
     
  8. ww_Crimson

    ww_Crimson New Member

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    Posted a similar situation thread about a week ago. Dude kept texting my girl and trying to flirt with her at a party. I was pretty heated, considered fighting him, had her talk to him instead. She told him she was with me, he's since backed off. If the dudes won't leave her alone after she tells them to that is when it becomes an issue for you to resolve.

    It seems like a lot of people in the vag don't trust girls to tell the guy to stop because they "love the attention" or something. You'll see what I mean if you browse my thread. If you think she's done her duty by telling the guy to knock it off and it doesnt -- that is when you take the next step.
     
  9. EBK

    EBK Hate hippies & hadjis

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    Exactly what I'm thinking.

    I spoke to her just right now and she told me she called her most recent ex after she texted me and asked him if he sent them. She told me the ex-boyfriend said no. I doubt that she's lying because she tells me the things he says to her (MySpace/voicemails). I trust her that she's telling him to fuck off because he leaves her comments like "eyy where did my comments go??", etc. so he's not getting it through his head.

    I really want to take the initiative but my gf and her ex were "best friends" before they began dating and agreed to be friends. She gets hurt easily and claims she "feels bad" when he calls up and pulls that 'I am depressed' shit

    I think I need some more guidance playing this one out
     
  10. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    It's alright if she gets flowers. It doesn't mean anything. Her coworkers will think it's from you. :mamoru:

    If she's attractive she'll likely always have guys hitting on her. That's what guys do and no, they never seem to get the message. You have to rise above and act like the better man and she will be more loyal to you.
     
  11. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    as long as she is still interested in you and the sex is still good then i wouldn't sweat it
     
  12. fray

    fray New Member

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    that said, if she tells them and they don't listen, it's not her fault if they're doing things like sending flowers. if she's talking to them on the phone, letting them come over, etc., that's her fault. but flowers she doesn't have much control over if she's already told them to back off.
     
  13. Ari1979

    Ari1979 New Member

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    lol you're overreacting and sound a lot like i did with my ex. :mamoru:

    Just chill, chances are you'll come off as insecure if you blow these small issues up. If this girl wants to be with you she will, nothing you can do about it. I would only intervene by confronting the guys if they became an issue for her. i.e they start harassing her etc.

    I do however believe that she should have the common sense to leave her ex completely in the past.
     
  14. ChaCha

    ChaCha Active Member

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    :bowdown:
     
  15. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Why does this situation happen so often? And why does the bf in the situation always feel it's his job to fight or talk to the ex boyfriend? This is something she needs to put her foot down on, at least if she gives a shit about you.

    You shouldn't turn to be pissed at the ex bf. He's a guy with a penis who doesn't care if she had a bf or not. You on the other hand are a guy dating a girl who wont do what is right and tell off any men who try and get with her.

    How long after they broke up did you two get together.

    More importantly, why is she even acknowledging her ex? Ask yourself that.
     
  16. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    so some dude wasted his money sending flowers to a woman he's not going to be able to fuck.

    What's the problem?
     
  17. EBK

    EBK Hate hippies & hadjis

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    They were best friends before dating.. At least 2-3 years before dating.. After they broke up they asked eachother to remain friends. I told her, 'hey -- it's ok if this dude wants to say hello or look cool by having you on his mySpace that's fine.. I trust you'

    I actually called her up a while ago and brought it up.. Told her he's not getting it and she needs to say it again. And that fucker even left a chinese lettering comment on her page that means "I love you" on Sep 5. -- brought that up as well.. Broke the tension a little bit with normal funny talk and made her laugh.. But after reading some of these posts I shoudlve just relaxed from the start.

    So, I texted her:
    "Hey I know youre busy at work but I want to say I overreacted eariler and I shouldve just said no to your question re: the flowers and continued working on your [gift]. You handle issues well enough -- talk to you later"

    Feedback on what I did?
     
  18. HuskiRuski

    HuskiRuski Cardinal Fan

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    she's giving them a reason to keep contacting her. trust me.
     
  19. Viper

    Viper OT Supporter

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    It's because the women in these scenarios like the attention and do not take the initiative themselves. What most of these guys don't realize is that the "anger" they feel is probably towards the fact that their girlfriend isn't telling these guys to fuck off and not toward the guys themselves.
     
  20. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    i do want to point out that i consider this completely different from guys who persistently hit on your girl or try to get her attention WHILE YOU ARE AROUND

    in that case i consider it my duty to make the other guy understand that i'm not gonna tolerate it
     
  21. Yail Bloor

    Yail Bloor OT Supporter

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    this i agree with as well

    how many threads do we see where a guy meets a girl, then she is suddenly "never available" and he can't get her on the phone at all

    if she is making herself available to these guys, there is at least some interest on her part
     
  22. ChaCha

    ChaCha Active Member

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    yeah, there are times where action needs to be taken but usually it's best to just not worry about it.

    And as you said, as long as the relationship, sex, what have you is still good, there really isn't anything to worry about.
     
  23. Drifter87

    Drifter87 Yippi-kay-ay, Motherfucker

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    If she did not want them contacting her, they would have stopped awhile ago. Believe me, my GF as put guys down, and once they realize she is not going to fuck them, they give up pretty quickly.
     
  24. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    where does she work?
     
  25. Dahlia

    Dahlia Active Member

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    I think we need a sticky for an EDU for this situation... This has happened so many times recently!
     

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