SRS social differences

Discussion in 'On Topic' started by okietiger, Jan 4, 2009.

  1. okietiger

    okietiger New Member

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    I just got engaged a week ago and my family is saying they dont agree with the marriage because we come from different social groups. My family was well off when I was growing up and has since lost most of their money, My fiance is from a family who never had much money growing up. I have always viewed people for what is on the inside not on how much money they have in their wallet or the group of people they associate with. This is both my fiances and my second marriage and my family did this with my first wife and it drove me nuts. They need to realize that I am happy and I want to spend the rest of my life with my fiance. I also dont want any tension in my family. Any Ideas to get them to accept my decision?
     
  2. no lol today

    no lol today Soy la bailarina de la muerta. OT Supporter

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    Are you Indian?
     
  3. RachTyrTaiya

    RachTyrTaiya New Member

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    why didn't the first marriage work out?
     
  4. okietiger

    okietiger New Member

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    nope
     
  5. okietiger

    okietiger New Member

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    she tried to commit murder-suicide
     
  6. no lol today

    no lol today Soy la bailarina de la muerta. OT Supporter

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    Then you don't have a caste system to worry about. It's not a feudal fucking society.

    Tell your parents to stuff it. Nobody wants to deal with the kind of bullshit they're trying to put on you.

    If you really want your life to take off, you're not going to get it without standing up for yourself. You'll have to face the conflict head on. In all likelihood, you'll gain respect for standing up for you own interests.

    Your parents DO NOT control your best interests. If they think they do, you need to set them straight, or else you'll be stuck in this scenario until they die. Then you'll resent them and feel bad about it. Make a move toward bettering all your lives now.

    As a side note, for several years I dated a guy whose father controlled his life. His dad was some rich, ex corporate scumbag. Didn't like me all that much ... & it's not like I'm not connected, either. My ex wanted to get married ... can't be sure if it was ME he wanted to marry, or just a life goal & a convenient situation. The man didn't know WHAT he wanted because he relinquished control of his own decisions to his father. He seemed very nice & polite at first, but I came to know what a miserable, depressed human being he was. I got sucked into it & never realized how miserable I had become until he was completely out of my life. Wow.

    Take control. You'll be a better person for it. Just take it slow, depend on your fiance for decisions often so you learn not to be overbearing.

    If things were different in my own past, I could see myself doing the same as your ex. Not that our situations are matched by any means - I just happen to feel like I can relate on a vague level.
     
  7. Raisedshoulder

    Raisedshoulder Some Blode.

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    This is something I did for a long time until recently. My girlfriend kept telling me to be independent and to stop trying to please everyone. She was able to show me how my parents controlled what I did. Now I'm a different person because of her.
     
  8. MattThom01

    MattThom01 New Member

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    there's probably nothing you can do. So...why bother? So they don't agree with the marriage? Tough shit for them. You need to live your life to make YOU happy, not THEM.
     
  9. RachTyrTaiya

    RachTyrTaiya New Member

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    yikes . . .



    it's your life . . . you are not hurting anyone do what makes you happy and if they can't understand that then . . . fuck em'.
     
  10. no lol today

    no lol today Soy la bailarina de la muerta. OT Supporter

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    Hope it's all good, man. With that little voice in your head constantly reviewing your actions to ensure approval from from your fam, you have no room to be a full fledged human being.
     
  11. Ameter

    Ameter Active Member

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    yikes
     

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