So, you're now her boyfriend..

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Kreigore, Mar 14, 2008.

  1. Kreigore

    Kreigore New Member

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    What now?

    A lot of emphasis is placed on "how to obtain" a girlfriend.

    What do you do after you've become a couple for a long period of time? How do you keep the interest?

    My experience/perspective: I still try to keep things relatively fresh and new. I have my own hobbies and activities I like to do (ice/roller hockey, snowboarding, hanging out with my friends with no girlfriends around, etc). You still need to have time to yourself and pursue your own goals and interests.

    My girlfriend and I go out occasionally to bars with mutual friends, go ice skating, go for walks, play frisbee golf - anything different. We'll even stay in for nice evenings together. The interest is definitely still there, but what about after one year, two years, four years, etc.?

    What do you do with your significant other? Does everything fall into place and you don't think about "thrilling" her (or him) as much?

    Women of the Vag, please feel free to chime in too. I'm interested in your perspective as well. :wiggle:
     
  2. eskarinna

    eskarinna New Member

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    keep on changing it. Go to vacations to bring back the spark.

    Make a date from time to time if you live together, its still kind of exciting to get dressed and doll up to meet your SO somewhere out and have a romantic evening, like as if its a 1st date.

    Try new things in bed or try having sex in places you don't usualy do.

    Do something kinky like have her dress the sexiest outfit and take her to a nice restaurant and to a nice hotel just to have sex somewhere different.

    For me i have always tried to surprise my bf/hubby with new things - nice message, a poem here and there, a gift without an occasion, sexy nightware, and other such. For example last weekend was dress up "provocative and slutty" day in our night club so i went wearing alot less than my usual jeans and shirt atire had few drinks and at the end of the night on our way out i even tried to dance on a pole for about 2min before anyone noticed just for him then the embarassedment got the better of me and we left. After all was something i have never done and was totaly hot for both of us ^^
     
  3. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    Keep it fresh by:
    *not becoming clingy
    *having a life of your own outside of them
    *making sure to communicate any issues that bother you upfront
    *coming up with new fun activities
    and many many other things, but those stick out the most for me.

    My bf and I LOVE trying new restuarants. We also try everything. One week we check out an arena football game. Next week we go to a theme park. This weekend we're traveling to a different city to go bar hopping, etc.
     
  4. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    perfect. Having a life outside of them (for both partners) is SO essential.
     
  5. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    role playing
    whips and chains
    vegetarian cruisine
     
  6. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    i'd like to hear floppy's input on this one

    i dunno. it's not something to worry about IMO. if the feeling is there it's there... if it isn't, find it elsewhere..

    it doesn't make sense to me to try to force something that has to occur naturally.

    i guess the best solution is, don't stay in a monogamous LTR or a bf-gf-by-default LTR with someone if the love isn't there.
     
  7. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    As for all that other stuff, I think having your own life is something that you need to do anyway - I wouldn't say that LTR's suffer because you don't do fun shit, I would say that life in general suffers because you don't do fun shit, and life includes your LTR('s).

    Either way you should still be clubbing.

    Beer, you've got disposable income, right? I just figure, from all the activities you mentioned, plus how you reacted so negatively to the line, "are you rich? i need a gf who will support me," in that other thread.
     
  8. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    you'll never know until you try it. my favorite dish is vegetarian lasagne :yum:
     
  9. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    I was a vegetarian for years, never seemed to help my relationships.
     
  10. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :rofl: My income is so far from disposable. I just handle my money wisely. I don't spend on material items. Just save towards bills and then for fun events.

    I'd rather have an awesome weekend at a huge concert than a big HDTV.

    I laugh at that canned line because it's ridiculous, at least to me. I would laugh in a guys face if he said that to me, and not in a cutesy way. In a "get a life, you bum" way. I know it's meant to be funny but I don't see why. It's fake funny.
     
  11. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Okay, sugar
     
  12. JordanClarkson

    JordanClarkson OT Supporter

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    oh well, you win some, you lose some
     
  13. demosnat

    demosnat New Member

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    I am genuinely curious as to how I would react to "canned" lines. But I guess i'm jaded from you people :squint:
     
  14. lauren

    lauren Active Member

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    as a unique and intellectual female, we see right through the bullshit and laugh in their face, but of course!
     
  15. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    :rofl:

    :bowdown:

    yeah. actually that's one interesting thing about the whole process. usually a girl's ego is big enough that she knows she was different from all the rest.

    especially after having had sex... you can say you're into seduction techniques and she will say, "o rlly that's cool, i'd like to see that."
     
  16. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    jaded? why?? :noes:
     
  17. mondaynightmike

    mondaynightmike New Member

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    DEFINITELY No *Unlinked* Cock Pics
    I see my SO maybe 3 times a week.

    It's just right.
     
  18. FloppyCock

    FloppyCock New Member

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    I think the big keys are:

    1) Being yourself. No fronting, no games, no bullshit.
    2) Being completely and entirely honest. About everything.
    3) Apologizing when you know you're wrong. When she returns the favor, don't rub her face in your rightness.

    There's probably much more, but those are the big ones. Keep in mind, I'm assuming you're not needy, clingy, controlling, spiteful, etc. If you are, you've gotta fix yourself (not by reading books...) before you can start to worry about a carefree, fun relationship.

    Yup.
     
  19. feint

    feint New Member

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    Having your life and not just the COUPLES life, especially after a few years in the relationship is PARAMOUNT. Alot of people tend to lose their own self identities in a long relationship... learn to love yourself first and improve your own skills. The couple that plays together, stay together.

    Remember Seinfeld where George didn't want Elaine to hang out with Susan? Yeah... same thing.
     
  20. teep

    teep New Member

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    I find that little things help keep things alive and fun more so than grand gestures. I'll pick up an US weekly for my girl and a pack of M&M's if I happen to be at the store, or sometimes I'll meet her after work and we'll go exploring in the city and out to eat. We like to randomly come across new cafes and restaurants and make them "our spot".

    Sex in new places is always great especially if it's spontaneous. I like to send my girl dumb text messages too. For example today she has on a striped shirt that makes her look like a sailor and I texted her that I was going to plunder her booty. Or the other day she asked me how I was feeling (I was sick), and I told her that my head was pounding like the pounding her vagina was going to get later.

    And like everyone else said (I learned this the hard way) space is key. Even if you live together it's so important to have your own life and do your own thing. You have to give the other person a chance to miss you.
     
  21. SC0TLANDF0REVER

    SC0TLANDF0REVER Rest In Peace, Brother...

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    Holy Lurker Batman!
     
  22. SC0TLANDF0REVER

    SC0TLANDF0REVER Rest In Peace, Brother...

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    So you're a Feminist. Not that there's anything wrong with that. You're probably a minx in the sack.

    You know it is interesting. When you meet that woman that's able to surpass the rest - my last GF (Love of my Life?) was *on point* with being different from anything I had ever encountered prior... then when it came to sex - whoa! To this day she still comes to me in my dreams...

    What I'm trying to say is that women rock!
     
  23. Emfuser

    Emfuser Nuclear Moderator Super Moderator

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    I've never met a female OT'er that wasn't jaded about men because of this place.
     
  24. iwishyouwerebeer

    iwishyouwerebeer you shut your cunt Moderator

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    :rofl: I even catch myself thinking about things from the forum. Last night after all these guys discussed how they hated ball play I asked my bf "so ummm, do you not really like ball play?" He went ":eek3: :rofl: Are you kidding!? I love it, I ask you for it!"

    :mamoru: I started to doubt it just because so many guys in one of the threads were against it. Silly me.
     
  25. innerpeace26

    innerpeace26 New Member

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    Exactly how i feel :)
     

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