so what should i do?

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by katatat, Jul 13, 2007.

  1. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    i dated a guy for quite some time, and became on good terms with his friends. we've been broken up for quite awhile now and him and i just recently lost complete communication.


    the problem:
    one of his best friends and i talk here and there, and he is throwing a party in a few weeks. i was invited to said party by his friend, the one throwing it. well another one of my ex's friends found out that i was going or was considering going, and asked me "why are you going" as if i am not allowed to be there or that i wasn't invited or what-have-you.

    what should i do?
     
  2. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    i assume you want to go to this party?
     
  3. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    yes. every other party or gathering that i've been invited i end up getting the boot because he is gonna be there and doesnt want me there so they have him come and me not allowed to be there
     
  4. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    i'm not trying to date anyone. especially any of his friends. i'm just talking about this party.
     
  5. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Go to the party... I don't see why this guy has any claim on what you do socially.
     
  6. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    i know. but yet most of his other friends would be like "he is going to be here, and we dont want him or others to feel awkward or have anything happen so you can't come". i had that happen about a month ago.

    if he is over me then it shouldnt be an issue if i'm there.
     
  7. Tripper

    Tripper Active Member

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    I wouldnt date fuck or hook up with one of My friends EX, i see it as s ign of respect, to the OP perhaps people are looking after you. one of my ec girlfriends new boyfriend use to hate when my Ex use to see me, then one night out of the blue he was like my best friend, giving me money to buy her and me drinks if we went out.

    think of it this way the reason your not allowed to go is some guy likes you but is a total dickhead, and is only after a hate fuck for his mate, ie bosst his own ego and make you feel like a bag of shit.
     
  8. wack0

    wack0 New Member

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    dont go
     
  9. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    If they disinvite you from the party then if you do go you're probably just stirring shit up, right? It would be a confrontation.

    I still don't see a problem. Do it if you want to
     
  10. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    On the other hand, I get the feeling you may want to go to this party to fuck with your ex-bf emotionally.. to get some power back. If that is the case then don't go.
     
  11. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    well if that's the case, then don't go

    why haven't you talked to him about it?
     
  12. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    i understand that his friends want to respect him. but at the same time i still think there's something behind all of it.

    i mean seriously. if you are over someone you should still be able to be in the same room and be ok with it. doesnt mean you two have to talk but still be civil.
     
  13. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    obviously there are some communication problems between you and your ex
     
  14. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    i really dont wanna start shit. i just wanna go to have a good time. see some people i havent seen in awhile (that still are cool with me). THATS IT
     
  15. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    he's always said he is over me, yet i would get phone calls and texts asking what i was up to, but it isn't like any of his friends knew this. :dunno:


    i just wanna go and have fun. no drama, no bullshit.
     
  16. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    how old are you?

    cause this sounds like some high school stuff and there's not much anyone on this forum can help you with :dunno: no offense to you
     
  17. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    he was my long time high school bf. but i'm in college, and he's......well... i don't know that he's doing anything.?
     
  18. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    i think i'll see how things progress until the party comes.
     
  19. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    I think you are hoping to verify that he isn't over you.

    Amirite?>
     
  20. sportsjunkie

    sportsjunkie OT Supporter

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    :werd:
    you know what's going to happen so why don't you just spare yourself the embarassment and humility and not go
     
  21. Kreigore

    Kreigore New Member

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    Honestly, if I saw my ex at a party I was at, it'd be pretty uncomfortable. We haven't been separated for that long. Seeing her out and about at a bar or club with another guy? I'd probably feel even more uncomfortable.

    I guess there would be a point at which someone "gets over" the other, but it wouldn't be 1-2 months. It could take multiple months or even years.

    I have a friend who dated a girl for 2-3 years then they broke up. I got a job at the same corporation as his ex. I spoke to her (as she worked in the same department as me) and hung out at work functions. She was a cool girl.

    Whenever I would talk about work or mention her in a casual way, he'd change the subject and admitted that he didn't want to hear about his ex in any form. He was with another girl at the time and was separted from his ex for about 8 months.

    The point is: There will still always be some love, hate, confusion, anger, or some other emotion there. It's all how you deal with it.

    In your ex's case, he probably doesn't want to see you. Be it talking to another guy or just being there. It brings back good or bad memories.

    Maybe you just weren't that into him?
     
  22. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    we were each others first loves, i'm his first real gf/relationship. and he lost his v-card to me.

    :dunno:
     
  23. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    its been a good while though already. just like a week and a half ago was when we lost complete contact with another.
     
  24. katatat

    katatat you're outta your league Donnie

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    ugh. so then what is my best option
     
  25. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Are you trying to figure out if he is or is not over by going to this party?

    If you're not about to get back with him it would be kindest of you to leave him alone.. up to you
     

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