So what do you do when you get a chicks number....

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Achmiel, Mar 13, 2006.

  1. Achmiel

    Achmiel Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshi

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    .... and you call the number and you get a voice mail system? I'm torn by this. Got a girls number I'm interested in getting to know better, and I tried to call the number to make sure it was legit. I got VM, so I hung up. I want to call again and leave a message, but I'm not really sure what to say. What would you do?
     
  2. B_RowL

    B_RowL OT Supporter

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    "Yo...its <insert name here>. Just wanting to say whats up...call me back at 555-555-5555."

    1) If she calls back...great! Shoot the shit with her and setup a date.
    2) If she dosen't call back...wait several days and try once more. Or see step 3
    3) (If she still didn't call back) Its time to move on...dont call back, because she is obviously not worth your time. Life is too short to act desperate and call a chick more than necessary who dosen't give you the time of day.
     
  3. Achmiel

    Achmiel Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshi

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    Mmmm... maybe I overthink shit. I'm gonna give it a shot :bigthumb:
     
  4. B_RowL

    B_RowL OT Supporter

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    BTW...don't fear teh voicemail and sound confident as possible. Alot of people screen their calls so its normally a good idea to exchange numbers, so she knows its you when you call (Thanks Poco! :bigthumb: )
     
  5. jonno

    jonno New Member

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    leave a short message telling her who it is and to call you. if she never calls dont call her again
     
  6. poopies4u

    poopies4u Active Member

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    get voicemail leave your name, where you met her at and ask her if she wants to go out <insert day>
     
  7. Werdna

    Werdna Livin' the SLO Life...

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    uh, leave a message... :ugh:
     
  8. Felix

    Felix Its good to be me.

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    Getting Vm is kinda better actually, that way you can say you made an attempt, leave a message and if she calls back you know she is interested, if she doesn't, then you know with out all the Bullshit
     
  9. chlywly

    chlywly Active Member

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    I call it, when ever im free, usually 1-2 days after
     
  10. N-Word-Jim

    N-Word-Jim Cure for boredom

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    I call it repeatedly until she answers, then I hang up.
     
  11. Achmiel

    Achmiel Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bullshi

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    Well, I called today and left a message. :dunno:

    On with my life now... :big grin:
     
  12. Elusion

    Elusion New Member

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    you should let us know if she calls you back.

    because we're ... curious ... and like to know stuff that isn't our business. Oh that's just me.
     
  13. The Big Eye

    The Big Eye New Member

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    I wish I could get a girls # in the first place :hs:
     
  14. GSRwBOOST

    GSRwBOOST New Member

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    wait a couple days and then call... in the case of the current so, she called me because i didn't call her (after 2 days)...


    it will drive them nuts why you havnt called,third day call them.
     
  15. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    I personally wait 5-7 days to call. I call once, and leave a message. "Hey, this is [name], call me back. 555-555-5555." Click.

    That's it. I don't call again.

    If she calls back, set up a date. If she agrees, you're good. If she agrees, but changes the day, you're good. If she agrees, but gives you ANY excuse as to why she can't go out (like she has to work or is too busy or whatever the fuck) then she is not interested - be polite and get off the phone, toss her number.
     
  16. RunDMT

    RunDMT OT Supporter

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    Leave a message saying you're breaking up with her, they always call back :bigthumb:
     
  17. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    :rofl: I like that one!
     
  18. Socrates

    Socrates New Member

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    My favorite is calling the girl and telling her you're pregnant.
     
  19. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Why wait so long? As a woman, I would interpret that as you not being interested.
     
  20. BlazinBlazer Guy

    BlazinBlazer Guy Witness to The De-Evolution of Mankind.

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    But.... it's Poco! He can't be wrong.... he's the expert on women and his word is law! :mamoru: :o

    I agree with you, however. Unless the circumstances prevent it, there's no reason not to call sooner if you're interested.
     
  21. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Yeah you know, I just don't agree with everything Poco says.
    And to be completely honest, if a guy waited 5-7 days before calling me back I probably wouldn't be interested myself. He obviously isn't all that into me. This whole game thing men and women seem to like to play is BS in my mind.
     
  22. PocoDiablo

    PocoDiablo New Member

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    Simple reason. To judge your interest level and to build some anticipation. I've been over this time and time again, really, and have had some interesting results. The whole "I would think he is not interested" line is easy to say, but in reality women act a while lot different.

    Most guys, when given a woman's phone number, will call her the next day. Right there most women will think he's predictable and, what's worse, she may even pick up on him being desperate. For the record, most women who I have called after 1 day have not answered their phone, nor have I received a call back.

    Now there are a large number of guys that have enough self-control to call in two days. However, the same is true as above. Women seem to say "He called after two days - predictably - like every other guy I give my number to." Again, a big yawn and usually no pick up of the phone.

    I know very few guys who will actually wait three days, and this is about the 50/50 mark from what I can tell. Calling in three days has a substantially better "return" than 1 or 2 days. Why? Well, maybe it's because you have not gone and done what every other guy has done - you showed some patience, some self control, and - get this - you're NOT like every other guy she's given her number to. This is important, because if you do or say something like every other guy, she is going to lump you in that pile *OF* "guy." Yes, you're a guy, just like every other guy who has called.

    Pause for a second. Remember folks, many women get hit on by LOTS and LOTS of guys. The more attractive they are physically, the more often they get hit on. So they will TEST you to see if you're like everyone else. Chances are you simply *are* like every other guy. Now think about this carefully. Say a woman gets hit on 5 times a day, and she has come to realize it's quicker to just give her number out in some - if not many - cases to end the conversation quickly and then move on to the next test. That test being, of course, how long he waits to call and what he says on the phone. Now she cannot possibly take the time to screen EVERY SINGLE guy she meets, so she is going to test them. And after being hit on over 1000 times she's gotten it down.

    You know that reply of "I've got a boyfriend" or "Sorry, I'm not interested" laced with ice cold emotion? That's a test. She may or may not have a boyfriend, but the concept here is to get rid of "guy." Any normal "guy" will lower his head, apologize, and scuttle away. Now some idiots will ignore her and try harder, to which she will have to keep pushing back more. She's immediately resistant to the approach, and she has learned through trial and error how to get rid of these dummies.

    Now, back to the call. So let's say you do call in 1 to 3 days... and she gets lots of calls... well, you have clearly not distinguished yourself from any other guy she has given her number out to. Guess what? You failed a simple test that she uses to screen out desperate guys.

    Day 4 is where things get interesting. I have found that after day 4 she changes. All the sudden she either forgets you (good; I'll explain) or she starts to wonder why you have not called (good also; I'll explain.) The simple fact is that now you are able to determine her interest level in you. Yes, if you were a complete idiot and she really did not want to talk to you, when you call on day 5 and she picks up or you have to leave a message, you'll be able to quickly determine HER interest level in YOU. If she picks up, you say "Hey, it's Poco from the bar." and she says "Who are you again?" then you know she has not been thinking about you at all. She's not interested. She was being polite when she gave you her number. But ... if after five days she remembers who you are ... hey, she's been wondering why you have not called! That is a sign of interest.

    The goal here is to find out her level of interest while simultaneously NOT projecting a level of desperation and insecurity. Most guys say to themselves "I'd better call so she doesn't forget who I am!" but hey ... guess what ... that's the point! :wavey: If you have to call quickly then it telepaths "I'm insecure! I'm desperate!" and women can smell that shit 100 miles away.

    I read an interesting letter from a woman a few days ago which demonstrates this nicely:

    This guy was desperate, he was creepy, and he was doing the same old shit that every other guy does. Did he even get her number? Not a chance. If he had, how long do you think he would have waited? A day? An hour? fifteen minutes? Not smart. :nono:

    Now let me give you a little hint about something I discovered a long time ago. I found out that women rarely talked about nice guys, nice things that happened to them, or things that were nice in general. Instead, they talked about the idiot who said something mean and made them cry. They talked about the BAD news all the time. Well, long story short, due to some genetic and evolutionary factors, human beings are essentially "programmed" to think about negative things. This is how we learn not to try to kill that wooly mammoth all by ourselves, lest we get stomped on. It keeps us alive. This is why if you grab a hot frying pan once, you're not going to do it again. This is why if you eat something and get really sick you're not going to eat that again. It's a survival instinct. And women work that way when it comes to the fact that you have NOT called. *IF* (a big if, pay attention to that) they were interested in you and you *don't* call they will often ask themselves "Why hasn't he called? Is he not interested in me?" (just like 03 white zx3 said ... hey, she proved my point! Thanks! :mamoru: ) or "What did I do wrong? Did I say something wrong? Maybe he thought I was too ugly or mean?"

    The point is that we all focus on our failures. You GUYS do the same thing. You call a woman, leave a message, and then wonder why she doesn't call back? We're idiots though, and we think "Maybe her answering machine is broken" or "Maybe her ringer was off" or "Maybe she is playing hard to get" or any number of idiotic reasons when in fact she is just not interested in you. We all work the same way.

    Now, realistically, if you called up to TEN DAYS later and she was really interested in you (and this does happen) you think she'd still go on a date with you? SURE! You could have been out of town, sick, caring for an ill parent, whatever. You may of had finals, or you may have just plain been TOO BUSY to call anyone and make plans. If a woman says "Oh, I'd never talk to him if he made me wait ten days, that's utter and complet bullshit. Women aren't usually that hardcore about how soon you called them, and quite frankly if you call and she is ... you don't want to be with her! I mean, if you do date her, and you're 15 minutes late picking her up is she going to flip out?

    People, look for caring and flexible women. If you find a woman is totally rigid about when you call her ... move on.

    Personally I have had very good experiences with calling after 5 days, and up to ten days. Sure, I've had so no-shows, but a lot less than if I were calling in one or two days.

    There are more details to this, but that's the general idea. Think about it and I am sure you can figure out other aspects of the concept.

    And, of course, this doesn't work for everyone, and it sure as shit won't work if you're not skilled with your social graces. So don't expect this to work if you've never done this before.

    A very good example, as most folks know, is the movie "Swingers." The scene where he is calling the girl he just met is SO typical and SO painful ... I actually cannot even watch it.

    So, there you go. No, you don't have to agree with me, and no this won't work for everyone. It just works for me and many guys I know, so take your best judgement of it and decide if it's right for you. ;)

    I'm heading out, enjoy your evening folks!
     
  23. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    Poco, I AM a woman. I HAVE dealt with the whole numbers thing. I no more agree with you after reading that long post than before I read it.
    If you would read my post, I also said that I would not be interested in someone who enjoys playing these little games and listening to people and rules on the internet about how long he should wait before he calls me. I think it is childish and petty.
    To be COMPLETELY honest it also irritates me when guys think that 'nice guys finish last'. There are plenty of mature women who appreciate a nice guy. Quit looking at the immature girls and maybe you'll find that. You DON'T have to be an asshole to get a woman.
     
  24. huntz0r

    huntz0r New Member

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    So who made up this law that they have to call you right back within two days (or whatever). What if the guy was out of town? What if he was just really busy because he's a hardworking ambitious guy or has lots of friends or is helping out familiy members or *gasp* is in demand with the ladies. You are gonna drop him just like that because he isn't playing by YOUR rules, huh? Even if you really really REALLY dug him and thought he was the best thing since sliced cheese, you'd pre-empt that with you arbitrary little two-day call rule?

    Good, at least they'll know you are inflexible and save themselves the trouble of dealing with your overstructured worldview. Hell, if he owes you so much after meeting you once and talking for a half hour, how demanding are you gonna be when you get married? :)

    We all know being an asshole is not the way to get a woman. Waiting 5 days to call is not being an asshole, it's being a self-controlled, self-assured person who doesn't have a need to rush into things. The problem with being a "nice guy" is not being nice... it's being needy and desperate and not having a backbone, which is the case with most who self-identify as "nice guys".
     
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2006
  25. Cerridwen

    Cerridwen Guest

    For one thing I'm married, so it truly doesn't matter. ;)
    If you're truly interested in a woman, it shouldn't be that hard to take a couple of minutes out of your day (it's not like you don't have access to a phone and never take a break or any time away from work) to call her.
     

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