So my gf saw a txt from my ex

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by Falconer, Dec 11, 2009.

  1. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    My phone goes "ding" (the sound it makes when you get a coin in Super Mario Bros., greatest txt notification sound ever) because I got a txt message. I was busy so I said "oh, I got a txt, can you check and see what it says?" (I don't have anything to hide, plus I was expecting a txt from my mom anyway)

    So my gf grabs my phone and is like "um..."

    The text was from "Crazy" and said "I hope you had a great thanksgiving and are doing well!!"

    "Crazy" is the name of my ex in my phone. I keep her in there only so I know when it's her texting me or calling me. I don't know her phone number and I wouldn't want to get a text or call from a number I didn't know and then have it be her. I don't answer calls from unknown numbers (if it's important they'll leave a vm) but I can't stand getting a txt from a number I don't know :run:

    So anyway, my gf knows who "crazy" is and she knows that every 6 months or so she tries to contact me. She also knows I don't talk to exes. But she asked "wow, why is your ex STILL texting you? Hasn't it been almost 3 years now since you guys broke up?"

    I said "I dunno. Probably because she's a dumb attention whore and she probably just got dumped or in a fight with her bf and is now looking for attention. That's how she operates. That's also part of the reason she's my ex."

    My gf was weird for like 5 minutes, and then she was back to normal and that was the end of it.

    Then I started thinking maybe my reply wasn't so great. I said it very matter of factly; it wasn't spiteful or anything, but it was a bit judgmental which chicks tend to not dig.

    Did I handle the situation ok?

    This was all like a week ago. It just popped into my head now.
     
  2. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    Sounds fine to me. I mean I don't think your ex is an attention whore for saying happy thanksgiving, but aside from that :bigthumb: for not talking to your ex!
     
  3. Toxica

    Toxica New Member

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    Sounds like a fine reply to me.
     
  4. antihero

    antihero OT Supporter

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    sounds fine to me.

    I would have kept the "why does she still text you?" answer to "don't know. don't care. delete it."

    In my experience with touchy things, keep it very short and sweet, because the more you say the more chance for something to be found offensive/suspicious/who the hell knows with women.
     
    Last edited: Dec 11, 2009
  5. ForgottenSpiral

    ForgottenSpiral Hope and Irony OT Supporter

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    :roflw:
     
  6. THoC

    THoC New Member

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    sounds fine to me. she didnt question you too hard and you replied to the point.
     
  7. kopetzki

    kopetzki Banned

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    subtle brag is subtle
     
  8. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    aka blow it out of proportion like they do with every fucking thing
     
  9. fray

    fray New Member

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    Sounds good to me. Would still be jealous it happened, but would not blame you for it.
     
  10. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    Brag in that another girl is into him?
     
  11. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    You sound cool
     
  12. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    I guarantee you it IS for attention/validation. That's how she operates. She wanted a reply so she could keep talking to me/change the subject and get validation.

    She's the master of slut plausible deniability. "What? We were just texting. It's not my fault I ended up fucking him!"

    That's why I don't even reply. Plus I don't talk to exes anyway. Plus she's tainted with old man cock. And she's a fucking basket case. She's hot and good in bed but she brings with her so many issues and so much drama that she wouldn't even be worth a FB if I was single.

    She was a wonderful learning experience, however. Every notion that is taught in PUA/social dynamics was multiplied 10x in intensity with her. It was like an accelerated course :rofl:
     
  13. chlywly

    chlywly Active Member

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    I think your looking way too far into this situation as you do with most situations. Your girlfriend seems alright and your response was fine, wtf is the point of this thread?
     
  14. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    odd.

    i for one found this thread interesting enough to warrant it's existence.
     
  15. Deborah

    Deborah Seeing is believing, but I don't want to know.

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    :werd:
     
  16. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

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    :werd:

    I agree, but just want to add that there are occasionally girls who benefit from more info rather than less... but you'll know when that's the case from spending time with them. Default mode - if you don't know one way or the other - should be short & sweet.
     
  17. BoomBoomBoy

    BoomBoomBoy Guest

    You handled it fine. You should probably ask her not to text you in the future if you really feel the way you described.
     
  18. infinite.purple

    infinite.purple New Member

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    ehhh contacting her at all will just encourage her to get pissed and text back. ignoring is the only way to go.
     
  19. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    This.

    Saying "don't contact me anymore" is validation because they get a response. Plus, if they really want to talk to you, it triggers that freak-out clingy/needy response which is the opposite of what you want from someone that you don't want contacting you.

    Besides, I already told her not to ever contact me again when we broke up. Obviously she didn't listen :rofl: But then again, everything I say is literal and correct (not my fault if she can't understand direct statements), and everything she said was part of some kind of game or maneuver, so when I told her "I don't talk to exes" she probably viewed from her perspective as being something I was saying at the time to bring about a specific result or some other game playing bullshit. Too bad for her, when I say "i don't talk to exes" I mean "all your texts and email are getting deleted without response." And when we actually broke up and I told her "do not contact me ever again in any form and I will do the same" I have no idea what she actually thought I must have meant. Actually, what I told her was something like "I don't want to be friends or have any contact, so don't contact me in any form and I will do the same. If this ever changes and I decide I want to have communication with you, I will let you know. Until then, do not contact me." And I definitely haven't changed my mind :rofl:

    I've probably gotten 10-20 messages from her since we broke up, from "hey, how are you doing?" (deleted) to a long "i hope whoever you are dating now doesn't make the same mistakes I did and let you get away blah blah self-serving bullshit designed to make me want to respond to her" (also deleted).

    I guarantee you in all cases she was contacting me less than 24 hours after she and some guy got in a fight or broke up. She's an attention whore (and therefore a bad girlfriend) and also a bit of an actual whore (also therefore a bad girlfriend).
     
  20. k1ko

    k1ko OT Supporter

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    falcon, i'm a little behind. is this gf a new chick or the same one you had problems with before?
     
  21. just_another_on

    just_another_on New Member

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    Broke up and got back together
     
  22. Falconer

    Falconer OT Supporter

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    Yeah.

    Things are really good now (knock on wood).

    The "ex" in this example is my psycho ex from like 2.5 years ago.
     
  23. k1ko

    k1ko OT Supporter

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    nice, i'm glad to hear that shit ended up working out
     
  24. schmitty101

    schmitty101 You might remember me from such films as "Dig your

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    dude you think way too hard. I think you overthink things even more than me.
     
  25. giz

    giz Active Member

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    werd :rofl: fuck dude how do you have time in the day to accomplish actual shit
     

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