So, my gf makes about 35% more than me at her new job...

Discussion in 'Vaginarium' started by MCohen, Jun 28, 2009.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. MCohen

    MCohen #NotMyPresident #AmericaIsAlreadyGreat #GoSolar OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2004
    Messages:
    40,450
    Likes Received:
    515
    Location:
    Washington, DC
    And now thinks she's entitled to make the final ruling on all financial related decisions involving both of us :rofl:

    Its cute now, but I imagine later in our relationship, its going to annoy the fuck out of me. :o

    I suck at being tactful, any ideas on how to shut her up?
     
  2. MCohen

    MCohen #NotMyPresident #AmericaIsAlreadyGreat #GoSolar OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2004
    Messages:
    40,450
    Likes Received:
    515
    Location:
    Washington, DC
    Although you're likely correct that she would shut up after that, it doesn't solve my problem, and instead creates another.
     
  3. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    Do you have a joint bank account?
     
  4. MCohen

    MCohen #NotMyPresident #AmericaIsAlreadyGreat #GoSolar OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2004
    Messages:
    40,450
    Likes Received:
    515
    Location:
    Washington, DC
    For the rent and household expenses only since we split that down the middle.

    When I said financial decisions involving both of us, I meant stuff like this:

    She feels we need a housekeeper to come a couple times a week, I think its completely unnecessary because we've been fine up until now. She says with both of us working, we should be able to enjoy our weekends or time after work w/o worrying about cleaning. I disagreed, she said she makes more than me, and she'll pay for it, and hired someone yesterday.
     
  5. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    You want to know how to get her to spend her money differently?
     
  6. MCohen

    MCohen #NotMyPresident #AmericaIsAlreadyGreat #GoSolar OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2004
    Messages:
    40,450
    Likes Received:
    515
    Location:
    Washington, DC
    More like finding a tactful way to tell her pulling the "i make more than you" card is fucking bullshit
     
  7. Soren

    Soren OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 9, 2002
    Messages:
    37,552
    Likes Received:
    5
    Opportunity cost. Didn't you graduate from a top school? :ugh2:

    Even worse, she's paying for it. :hsugh: You sound like a sniveling control freak.
     
  8. Genghis.Tron

    Genghis.Tron New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2002
    Messages:
    5,188
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Great White North
    Is it a problem because you didn't get your way or because you didn't get to decide together?
     
  9. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    Wait, what? So it's okay if she spends her money on a housekeeper? Or it's not okay? You are flip-flopping at me.
     
  10. MCohen

    MCohen #NotMyPresident #AmericaIsAlreadyGreat #GoSolar OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2004
    Messages:
    40,450
    Likes Received:
    515
    Location:
    Washington, DC
    God, some of you are so motherfucking dense.

    Its going to get worse when we start sharing all expenses. Thats the fucking point.
     
  11. Ford4Life

    Ford4Life Guest

    She is paying for it, what do you care?
     
  12. NuShooz

    NuShooz OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2005
    Messages:
    11,761
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Southern CA
    this just screams..."i want control of every decision"

    it may seem all nice when she says she's gonna get a housekeeper and she'll be paying for it. But this is a sign that she'll be making nearly ALL the decisions when you're married.
     
  13. MCohen

    MCohen #NotMyPresident #AmericaIsAlreadyGreat #GoSolar OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2004
    Messages:
    40,450
    Likes Received:
    515
    Location:
    Washington, DC
    :werd:

    Congrats, you're easily the smartest person to post a reply in this thread.
     
  14. Soren

    Soren OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 9, 2002
    Messages:
    37,552
    Likes Received:
    5
    All I see is her paying for a housekeeper who will benefit the both of you. Your point is weak.

    You have to make quite a logical jump from her paying for a useful housekeeper to her commanding you to pay for useless things. :hsugh:
     
  15. MCohen

    MCohen #NotMyPresident #AmericaIsAlreadyGreat #GoSolar OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2004
    Messages:
    40,450
    Likes Received:
    515
    Location:
    Washington, DC
    I'm not explaining this you to any further. You're clearly not smart enough to infer how current negative actions will only get worse as time goes by if they are left unchecked.
     
  16. CorpseStreet

    CorpseStreet New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 10, 2008
    Messages:
    9,447
    Likes Received:
    0
    First off, having a housekeeper may be nice but to me it is completely unnecessary so why waste your money on it? Also, going out and saying that she gets to make this decision because she makes more money is a pretty low blow. Yeah it's her money and she should be able to do what she wants with it but considering you guys live together hiring a housekeeper should be a decision made together regardless of her financial situation. In a relationship you should be equals but to me it is coming off as if she thinks she has the upper hand now. Sit her down and explain to her how you don't appreciate her making these kinds of decisions on her own. Also, mention how you didn't like the fact that she brought up how she makes more money or used that as a reason why your opinion no longer matters. If you're going to continue living together she just can't continue using her financial situation against you.
     
  17. MCohen

    MCohen #NotMyPresident #AmericaIsAlreadyGreat #GoSolar OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2004
    Messages:
    40,450
    Likes Received:
    515
    Location:
    Washington, DC
    How am I being controlling? :hsugh:
     
  18. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    No, I'm smarter than you are. I promise! Seriously. No question.

    You are the one asking how to get your girlfriend to spend her money on stuff of your choosing.

    If she spends her own money on a housekeeper that is qualitatively distinct from spending pooled money.

    I don't know why you are grouping them together.

    When she tries to spend pooled money without your input, come back here and I will tell you how to keep your woman in check.
     
  19. Ford4Life

    Ford4Life Guest

    You want to "check" her behavior. You can't, it's her money and she can spend it on what ever the fuck she wants to spend it on. Instead you are acting like a pissy little bitch because she didn't do what you wanted.
     
  20. MCohen

    MCohen #NotMyPresident #AmericaIsAlreadyGreat #GoSolar OT Supporter

    Joined:
    May 30, 2004
    Messages:
    40,450
    Likes Received:
    515
    Location:
    Washington, DC
    You're may be smarter than me in some twisted wet dream, but certainly not in reality.

    WE ARE GOING TO BE POOLING OUR MONEY TOGETHER IN THE FUTURE. IF SHE IS PULLING THIS "I MAKE MORE THAN YOU, SO I CAN OVERRIDE YOUR DECISION" SHIT NOW, IT WILL GET WORSE DOWN THE ROAD.
     
  21. Dahlia

    Dahlia Active Member

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2008
    Messages:
    27,527
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lexington, KY
    This. If some guy tried to dictate how I spend my own money that I worked hard for I would get tired of it real fast.
     
  22. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    Before we teach you what to do you need to distinguish between different cards.

    She is pulling the, "I am spending my money on what I please," card.

    There is also the, "I am spending our pooled money on what I please," card.

    You are pulling the, "I can't follow basic logic because I'm trolling," card, which is the only way to confuse cards 1 and 2
     
  23. Ford4Life

    Ford4Life Guest

    Since she's paying the house keeper, ask if she can afford to get you a nose job with all her new found wealth.
     
  24. JohnJohnJohnson

    JohnJohnJohnson Effetely Sipping My Latte OT Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2004
    Messages:
    23,006
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Manhattan
    :bowdown:

    This thread is my favorite today.
     
  25. THoC

    THoC New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2007
    Messages:
    7,341
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    TRampa, FL
    based on what you have said this is not an issue yet.

    she has not brought up making more then you. you may be insecure about it and her making a decision that you did not consent to could just be the start... but as of now i would not make a big deal of it.

    if she ends up brining up making more then you OR if she makes purchases for the house that impact you w.o consent then i would bring it up.

    simply tell her that you feel like decisions should be made together and that you are bothered that she overlooked your opinion.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page